At some point I really have to write a fic about Sauron/ celebrimbor. I was a Sauron girlie long before I was a maedhros girlie. There’s just so much to think about there, Sauron really is the Tolkien version of Lucifer, the fallen angel. The guy who was quite literally an angel in paradise but as with any Tolkien villain, greed corrupted him and he destroyed himself totally of his own accord. But the line that really scratches at my brain is ‘nothing is evil in the beginning, even Sauron wasn’t so’’, like????!! He wasn’t always evil. And I’m not a person who really buys the whole oh melkor corrupted Sauron. I think that Sauron totally did that to himself. And I think there were probably some moments where he regretted his choices but really ONLY out of vain reasons where he would see the beauty of goodness in others and wish he were still beautiful without wanting to actually be good
I think the ONE AND ONLY time he ACTUALLY regretted what he had become was with celebrimbor. I think he felt a genuine love and connection to celebrimbor that he hadn’t felt since he was young and pure and he wanted to have his cake and eat it too. He wanted power but he still wanted his friend and he was way too far gone to turn back and there was no way this could have gone any differently but I think some sort of him wanted to stop what he was doing and be a different person but he gave up too much of himself already for that to be possible
