But also like. A thought I've been having a lot lately is that I used to call myself asexual and thought I might possibly even be aroace because I just didn't feel a lot of romantic attraction towards people save for a few exceptions and when I did actually try to get into dating sexuality felt like some sort of chore. And me IDing as ace was SUCH a big thing for some reason, I remember having so many discussions about how I'm denying myself so much etc. Well as it turns out I was SAd and that was a coping mechanism but like. Being ace wasn't what harmed me. What harmed me was people constantly telling me off for it. Even if it is actually a phase, that doesn't make it any less valid and important in your journey to find yourself, you know? Without ace people showing me it was okay to have a relationship without sex I wouldn't have ever been in a relationship where I felt comfortable setting boundaries from the beginning, and I would probably just have let potential partners go for it without consideration for my own wellbeing, because I couldn't imagine physical intimacy as a space where I was in control.
