Close yet Apart
Having to bring this up again is redundant and said 1000x over, but it needs to be: 2020 was...awful. For everyone.
Me personally, though, hit a couple of roadblocks: quitting my job of 6 years took a bit from me, but was manageable and very timely (given I quit BEFORE the virus hit. I dodged a bullet with that one), and I moved to a new...albeit okay-ish job for a time. But more importantly because of the virus being everywhere, that meant we had to push back plans for my loving boyfriend to come visit the US.
To me that set the tone for the rest of the year, and I was unfortunately right.
The year got more stressful, more awful, and maybe 7 months into my new job got me (along with others) being overworked with limited numbers. In the end, I left that job, too. It’s been 5 months since then...
-and along the way I fell into a really...really bad funk of sorts. I didn’t know how to handle these emotions, but I figured I could try on my own for a bit. With the entire world just turning on it’s head with everything horrible going on, everyone’s got bigger issues right now than deal with my feelings. What position was I in to try reaching out to someone?
...I still feel so silly for how simple it was, but that’s all I had to do. I reached out to you, @agent-everfree, and I felt a lot better after. Not 100% of course, but way better. I still struggle with a few things even now...
I think that’s the biggest take I got from last year: even with a literal pandemic going on...even with my personal and financial problems, or anything in between...even if we don’t frequently talk like regular in-person couples do, I’m so fortunate, lucky, and grateful to have you in my life.
Not getting to see you last year hurt me so much. Despite that, we’ve still gone 7 years strong. We made it, and still have to get through all of this. But I know we can...with all the love you give me every time we speak, or message between each other - I know that everything’s going to be okay.
I will see you again; I’m counting on it.
Happy Anniversary, love~
