...bruh. Out of literally all of the things that people guessed to be the topic...it was just straight up THIS. Which means that excellent fic fodder shall be provided. (I watched this episode when it came out but my brain was on fire the whole time and it it took awhile to process...)
...or is it? >:3
General Ep Thoughts
I love Joyce omfg <3 One of my fave guests!
2 people that can get Shane Madej to purr: - 1.) Steven Lim (by complimenting Shane’s commentary voice in Watcher Weekly) - 2.) Joyce because Joyce
Ryan asks Joyce if the list was written as a marry, f*ck, or get that a*s obliterated list...but instead of saying “f*ck” he does this gesture...
K*nk Counter: 1 (F*sting)
(Ryan says his list a mixture of both f*ck and marry btw)
I feel like Ryan saying this was lost on me in my first two watches but the third time, man oh man...seriously, do something nice for ya self today and re-watch this part.
How he thought we would think this meant anything other than V*agra??? Like, sir, you yourself have said that you become very sleepy/useless on, well, what you meant to say...
Their faces OMFG
I’m sorry Ryan, you WHAT NOW??? (This is proof positive, imo, of a common headcanon that if Ryan were to happen upon a k*nk of Shane’s, he would become obsessed with finding out more and would end up on an Internet deep dive (Nord VPN!)
(Also he goes on to say that he wouldn’t use the word s*xual to describe Shane and it’s like...what counts as being outwardly s*xual enough to garner that as a characteristic? XD Does Ryan think of himself as being s*xual? :o )
So then Shane does this in reply to what Ryan said...
and then Ryan’s like:
...
EXCUSE ME YOU WHAT NOW? Was this *just* to rile him up and make him *prove* that he was s*xual so you could watch?!?! Wat. WAT. Full List Analysis for Ryan and Shane
So as far as DEEP ANALYSIS for their full lists are concerned, going from left to right: Shane The notes are a bit longer because he waffled back and forth between “these aren’t characters I would bang” to “yeah I’d bang Ursula” to “yeah, Fifi’s a smoke show.” Some people thought he might be faking some or all of his picks, some didn’t. Either way makes for good fic. So, I’ll just be typing my HCs as if they were all legit, for fun XD 5. Miss Bianca - 1920s Mommy (K*nk 2, A*geplay/Mommy K*nk) issues according to Joyce and he likes that she’s always ready for adventure. And then was just like “maybe a throuple situation.” AND I WAS JUST LIKE...BE STILL MY SHYANARA/SHARYELLE/SMASHR HEART??? 4. Ursula - Likes that she’s powerful (K*nk 3, the “S” in B*SM) knows what she wants, and that she would c*sh him with her t*ntacles (K*nk 4, the “B” in B*SM and also K*nk 5, t*ntacles). Ryan: So this is the one you wanna bang then? Shane: Yeah! 3. Queenie - Mommy giving milk (K*nk 6, l*ctation), and the way he talks about nippyness (K*nk 7, n*pples), which of course meant Ryan had to chime in with (you want to do the sucking or you want to get sucked?). This shows not only Ryan’s previously known n*pple k*nk, but also low-key sounds like a convo that could easily be plucked from a switch fic. >:3 Unsure about that whole o*dipal thing though... 2. Rattigan - Wants to be him, not boink him, but he’ll wait and see what happens. MAJOR switch energ XD 1. Fifi - Regrets not putting Lumiere on there when he saw Ryan’s top hottest Disney characters involved him in the middle of two animated Lions ;) Also, human Fifi has a similar physique to Sara and feather duster Fifi has a dump truck a** like Ryan >:3 Ryan 5. Powerline - Bi King Bergara (K*nk 8, s*xy dancing). 4. Vixey - Ryan’s S*xual Awakening (K*nk 9, furry). 3. Esmerelda - Mentions her beautiful green eyes and lovely curly hair (like Mari’s ;-;); also mentions the green eyes of Scar and Nala; Shane says Ryan is gonna get a bit Topsy Turvy with his #3 pick, and then adds (or Bottomsy Turvy); more headcanon proof for switch!Shane ;) 2. Roxanne - Vanilla pick, cute nerdy girl; not much to say here unless I’d be stretching to make it fit for his crushes on various Buzzfeed people in fic :3 1. Nala/Simba - Ryan wants to be in a lion OT3 XD Last Part of the Ep Thoughts
Joyce suggesting Ryan wants to be in the middle and Ryan goes into throuple!panic mode ;)
...why do we even bother with fic when they write it for us?/j
