I miss my John Watson. I don't even know which iteration of the broader source I'm from is my specific source, process of elimination has ruled out all slightly more modern adaptations I'm aware of, but I don't feel like my source would be the original novels either.
Perhaps I have to write my own iteration of my source, which would be far easier if I had real exomemories to rely on. Sure, I have my intuition, but I think anyone with any sense of who I was would understand why I prefer something at least mildly more reliable than that. But if I can only rely on myself for source information (because I have yet to even find another person with a similar experience, let alone with compatible senses of what the world was like), I'll have to work with what I have.
I must admit, I hate that I know the response if I ever publish my experiences. Yes, I was in love with my John, and he with me, I'm sure plenty iterations of us were and plenty weren't (and both paths are entirely understandable). But "god" forbid someone write a serious novel about it because... Well, because apparently, the long and storied tradition of fanfiction, something heavily linked with the original Sherlock Holmes novels in the days before the internet, is not "respectable" and clearly, according to some people who wouldn't know realism or respect if it bit them, it's just unimaginable that two social outcasts who have excellent rapport would end up in a forbidden romance at a time when same-sex relations were outright illegal.
After all, the law is always followed, isn't that right? And it's often Americans who make such an unreasonable fuss about it, as if that whole country wasn't founded on people defying authority. Oh, but that's not it, the "problem" is that teenage girls enjoy it so it must be terrible, right? I've found teenage girls can have more sense than grown men sometimes. Though romanticizing "our love could literally get us killed" can go a bit over the top, honestly, it's exhausting trying to evade detection by the law. At least they weren't as suspicious as everyone is today.
