#siddgeir

[traindork]

Siddgeir, the debaucherous Jarl of Falkreath

[headcanongarbagedump]

Jarl Siddgeir fanclub do u exist im gonna assume u do

Jarl Siddgeir smashers?

YES THATS ME!!

no thanks

nuance/platonic option

Voting ended onApr 21, 2025

[skyrimtournaments]

Best Jarl Tournament: Round 2

Siddgeir vs Laila Law-Giver

Siddgeir

Laila Law-Giver

Voting ended onFeb 17, 2025

These two both got almost exactly two-thirds of the vote last round. Now that they're head to head, will one of them get two-thirds again? Or will this match be more or less definitive?

[archangelsunited]

How Ulfric sees his opponents

[ladytanithia]

WIP Wednesday

tagged by @thequeenofthewinter

Trigger warning: prelude to SA, nothing terribly graphic.

Future chapter of The Best-Laid Plans Oft Go Awry.

tagging @dirty-bosmer @skyrim-forever @gwilin-stay-winnin @mareenavee @thechaosdragoness @thana-topsy

“My jarl, I’ve helped your people as you asked,” Miranja told Siddgeir with a respectful bow.

“Yes, about that thane title…” Siddgeir said, eyeing her shrewdly. “There are some things you must know about this position that would be better discussed in private.”

Miranja’s hackles rose. So far, no other jarl had indicated there was anything secretive about the position she’d been granted. This didn’t feel right. Nonetheless, ignoring the voice of alarm in her head, she followed Siddgeir when he rose and went to his private chamber, figuring she could defend herself against one man if it came to that.

Once the door was closed, Siddgeir got right to the point. He drew very close to her but refrained from touching her. “Before I give you the pleasure of becoming a thane in my court, I’d like for you to give me some pleasure. Understand?” He reached up and lightly toyed with the lock of hair that had loosened at her temple.

Oh, she understood, all right. What an ass! “Jarl Siddgeir, I don’t know what kind of woman you think I am, but I don’t use sex to get special treatment. My work for you throughout the hold should speak for itself. If you think I’m going to sleep with you to become a thane, then you’re sadly mistaken, and you can shove your thane position straight up your ass.”

He actually seemed to be amused and aroused by her defiance. “Sweetheart,” he said condescendingly, “your reputation as a crimefighting sellsword isn’t the only reputation that’s followed you here. Now, if you want to keep that choice piece of land I gave you, then you’ll return the favor with a choice piece of ass. Call it an agreement between friends.”

Miranja was too stunned by his audacity to know how to respond. She really wanted to keep that land – aside from Proudspire, it was her favorite property. Plus, she was concerned about who in Oblivion might have told him about her sexual activities and who else might be in the know. Or was he bluffing?

Before she could respond, he spoke again. “If you want to play hard-to-get for a little excitement, I think I can play along.” He pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and balled it up in his fist. In the couple of seconds it took her to realize what he planned to do with the handkerchief, he had grabbed both of her hands and squeezed them tightly together in one hand, then grabbed her head with the hand holding the handkerchief and pulled her toward him.

Gods, why was she always so slow to think to use her Shouts?

He kissed her forcefully, pushing his tongue into her mouth, exploring, then he withdrew and stuffed the handkerchief into her mouth before she could use a Shout against him. And why didn’t she take the opportunity to bite his gods-damned tongue off? Was she afraid of punishment? Or did she…

[uesp]

"You've proven reliable. There's a group of bandits in my Hold that I... may have had a few discreet dealings with. The cut they were giving me was good at first, but now it's time to clean things up. Go and take care of it."

--Siddgeir, Jarl of Falkreath, admitting he was supporting the bandits that were preying on the people of his hold and Skyrim.

[dingoes8myrp]

Damn Dog

Siddgeir: I could make you a thane if... Did that mutt just knock something over?

Me: -shrug- Not my mutt.

Siddgeir: But, you brought him into my longhouse.

Me: Nope. He followed me. No idea what that's about.

Barbas: She sat in your throne while you were sleeping!

Siddgeir: I was wondering why it was smeared with blood. Well, no matter. Proof you did the job I asked. Also, I'd love to know how you got the dog to talk.

Barbas: *barks incessently*

-

Arcadia: Watch what you're doing!

Lydia: It wasn't me! It was the dog!

Barbas: Way to rat me out, Lydia.

Arcadia: He talks?

Me: Barks, too. Want some dragon bone?

Arcadia: Ooh, I'd love some dragon bone.

Barbas: I got a bone for ya right here...

Arcadia: ...

Me: ...

Lydia: God, we gotta get rid of him.

-

Farengar: Good to see you! I just got some new spell tomes and scrolls! Have a look!

Barbas: You smell like crappy magic.

Farengar: ... Did your dog just insult me?

Me: He's not my dog. Here, I found some robes I thought you'd like.

Farengar: ... There's blood on them.

Me: Yeah, sorry about that.

Barbas: She kills wizards on the regular. I wouldn't talk to her much longer.

Farengar: I'll give you a hundred Septims if you never bring that thing in here again.

Me: Deal.

[thebanneredmareinn]

u okay buddy?