I am starting a towel... lace. Lace towel. I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS PATTERN. IT'S IN A MAGAZINE FROM THE 1980S. I mean. I understand it SOMEWHAT but BUT HOW DO I REPEAT THE FUCKING THINGGGGGGGG. IT SHOWS A SQUARE AND THE INSTRUCTIONS ARE LIKE A COUPLE OF SENTENCES, A PHOTO (THAT IS NOT EXACTLY HELPFUL) AND A PATTERN SQUARE THING WITH DOTS AND AND SQUARES.
And the main issue? I think I didn't chain the correct number of chains for the pattern and I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WHEN I TURN BECAUSE THE PHOTO SHOWS THE TOWEL ON A TABLE AND YOU CAN ONLY SEE ONE SIDE. SCREAMING CRYING AND THROWING UP. The Spanish? Now I get it. The filet isn't meat okay I'd understood that I KNOW I'M DUMB BUT NOT THAT MUCH but when I turn I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO DO AND I WANT TO SURPRISE MY MOTHER WITH THIS TOWEL OKAY. SO I CAVED AND ASKED WHAT THE FILET MEANT AND SHE WAS JUST LIKE 'oh that's just the chains and the talls stitches back and forth to make the lace pattern haha' AND THEN LAUGHED WHICH OKAY I LAUGHED TOO BUT I WAS BECOMING THE JOKER BECAUSE I'M AUTISTIC AND HAVE ADHD OKAY ALL DIAGNOSED TOO YES SHE DIDN'T WANT TO BELIEVE IT AT FIRST BECAUSE IT'S HEREDITARY AND YEAH SHE HAS SOME OF THAT TOO, BUT I GOT IT FROM BOTH SIDES SO YAY ME WOOO AMAZING. jokes aside, I was becoming the joker because of the old terminology and she was joking that it was all that gringo terminology BUT NOT REALLY BECAUSE NOWADAYS PEOPLE DON'T REALLY SAY THIS STUFF LIKE BACK THEN EVEN IN HISPANIC/MEDITERRANEAN/IBERIAN CONTEXTS OKAY? OKAY. so the gringos were not to blame it was the ancestors calling lace meat and me not getting it and google being USELESS.
Now. The foundation chain is 267 chains. TWO HUNDRED AND SIXTY SEVEN CHAINS. The first row is just double crochets. I did that. Then I did the second one. Then comes the third one. IT'S NOT ALIGNING. I DON'T KNOW IF THE PROBLEM IS THAT I CHAINED WRONG OR SIMPLY THAT I DO NOT KNOW WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO DO. I CAN DO LACE. I CAN. I HAVE MADE DOILIES WITH WACK ASS EDGES I KNOW ALL THE STICHES, I GO THROUGH BACK LOOPS AND I DID MY HOMEWORK. BUT I DO NOT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK I DID WRONG AND I DON'T WANT TO SHOW MY MOTHER, OKAY. IT'S MEANT TO BE A SURPRISE. SHE POINTED THIS TOWEL AND SAID SHE'D MEANT TO MAKE IT BUT NEVER GOT AROUND TO IT. AND NOW I AM IN A TIME CRUNCH BECAUSE I WANT TO GIVE IT TO HER FOR CHRISTMAS AND MY MOTHER IS MY PRIORITY RIGHT NOW LIKE. CHUNKY CROCHET? THAT SHIT CAN BE WHIPPED UP IN A COUPLE OF HOURS. I'M TOOTING MY HORN I DON'T CARE. I STARTED AT THE START OF THE YEAR. AND I WORK FAST AND KEEP MY TENSION CONSISTENT. I STARTED LACE LAST WEEK AND I CAN KEEP THAT SHIT CONSISTENT AS WELL. ALMOST CRIED BECAUSE MY MOTHER VALIDATED SOMETHING I DID FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE ENTHUSIASTICALLY BECAUSE TENSION IS A BIG DEAL. BUT I WANT TO SURPRISE HER BY MAKING THIS RIGHT WITHOUT FURTHER HELP.
At this point, amigxs, I will march up to the old lady who sold me the yarn and show her this magazine and ask for HELP. THE SAGA CONTINUES. I AM ON A RAMPAGE.













