#simplyfelisa

[whatfesaid]

Old Ladies and the Dating Game

I have a vlog and sometime last year I posted a video about dating over 40. Since I am over 40..and I would like to date I figured I had something to say on the subject. I recently had a viewer leave a comment in the troll section wondering if I really thought “anyone was trying to date old ladies”. While I didnt answer him directly I will answer it here with a short HELL YES! I have no idea when over 40 became old (Im lying, I used to think 30 was near death when I was in high school) but yes men are trying to date us. Ok...they mostly try to sex us but sometimes there are some requests for dates in there.

Point is that old ladies over 40 appreciate effort. We appreciate men who know exactly what they want and are past the stage of trying to scam up on some booty. The majority of us have long stopped being interested in men who present a project...men who need more encouragement than Iyanla can give, men who are “fixer uppers” and generally will require us to pull out a breast, not in the passionate sex way...more like in the I am breastfeeding a man over 30 way. 

Women of a certain age are tire of the bullshit. Women of a certain age are looking to date with a purpose. Women of a certain age have experienced life in a certain way and no longer give passes for lackluster, half-assed approaches. Old ladies as we were referred to are like roller coasters and unless you are at least THIS TALL...you cannot ride...

[whatfesaid]

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New Vlog is up! I've been on sabbatical since losing my dad and tho this isn't me 100% it's a start! Topic is Actively Single.. Watch, like subscribe! Link is in bio.. #simplyfelisa #youtube #blogger #vlogger #speaker #activelysingle #single #relationships #meetups #socialcircle #dating #dating101 #datingfiles #love #findinglove #summerlove

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Dating over 40...#over40 #over45 #lowerexpectations #dating #dating101 #singlemom #single #relationships #datinglife #datingover40 #marriage #igiveup #simplyfelisa #curvychick #2016 #instapic #selfies #vlogger #doeshehavehisteeth

[whatfesaid]

Life is ah-mazing! Learned a few things the past few months . 1. Forgiveness does not mean you are ok with the behavior. It also does not mean you can't hold people accountable for what they did. 2. You aren't required to set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm. Some sacrifices are not worth it 3. Stop embracing people who reject you. The need to be liked and wanted will destroy you. They wanna leave..let them go 4. Life is about choices. We all have them. We might not like them but we have them. You are not a victim unless you want to be. 5. You teach people how to treat you. Sometimes when people have too much access to you it's taken for granted. Stop letting people pimp your emotions and loyalty with no boundaries. 6. Start putting yourself first. You can't give anything to anyone if you are so broken, drained or half crazy. Your kids don't want an angry, frustrated mama. Put on your own oxygen mask first...breathe. 7. We get one life...one go round. No do overs. I don't live with regret..all experiences teach. Live..love..be well. Happy Sunday! #beautifulday #browngirl #curvygirl #simplyfelisa #revelation #understanding #takecareofyourself #happysunday #relationships #purpose #goals #lifeisgood #ahmazing #loveme #happinessisachoice

[whatfesaid]

Sometimes you have to let go even when everything in you wants to hold on...#weight #release #letgo #moveforward #moveon #peace #relief #namaste #simplyfelisa #futuregoals #futurefocus #joy #happiness #liveandlearn #liveoutloud

[whatfesaid]

The Struggle to Fitness

I like to eat. I like to eat things I like to eat. I don’t think I am the only one that feels this way. Living in a community where there is literally a Starbucks on almost every corner (no exaggeration. There are at least 4 within a 4 mile radius of my house) including inside my neighborhood Target (I have NO idea how I managed to get toilet paper and not have a latte all this time). Not to mention the Wendy’s, Tubby’s (appropriately named don’t you think?), KFC, 2 McDonalds, 2 Burger King’s, Potbellys, Penn Station, Chipotle, 7-11 and the too many to name stores and gas stations that all sell my favorite candy (everything is my favorite when Im dieting) I feel like I am losing a battle for my own fat. Reality is that should I choose to acknowledge it, I will be 47 my next birthday. Gravity has inched its way into the folds of my fat and are urging them to return to the earth from which it came. Everything seems to be in downward facing dog form and I am inclined to just go with it.

Then there is the small voice in the back of my head that tries to be reasonable. The little voice that convinced me to buy Insanity when I really just wanted to buy a great pair of shoes. That was the same voice that said it would be a great idea to buy cute little Nike sneakers because if I wore them I could finish my work outs. That voice should be silenced with a face full of Oreos and never permitted to speak again. Insanity is exactly what is sounds like and I am convinced that that is exactly what I will be at the end of these 2 months I am committed to. The fact of the matter is that I am overweight. I am a middle aged mom who has carried and given birth to 4 human beings. I like Oreo’s and chocolate and foods covered in sauces. I also want to live a healthy and long life...so I am trying to find the balance of it all.

I am committed to a healthier me but I am also committed to enjoying my life every day I am blessed to have one. What does that mean? It means that I will work out and have an Oreo when I want. It means that this summer I will lift a jiggly part of my body and shove it into a swimsuit of my liking. It means that I will love the skin Im in without shame and if someone does not like something that might be hanging from underneath my swimsuit, or shorts or whatever garment I choose to wear they have two choices. 1. lift it up and put it back where they think it belongs or 2. minding their own damn business, Personally I’d like to suggest 2. It will make things so much easier for the both of us.

Life is short...eat an Oreo when you want.  Exercise when you want. Live each day to the fullest. At the end of life no one regrets not spending more time in the gym...they regret not spending more time LIVING!