#singlefeels

[tatsyzeroone]

am i gay now?

[such-a-lonely-word]

Y’all, do you ever cry? I keep thinking that 2018 really should be the year I give up fanfiction - not because there’s anything wrong with fanfic per se, but because I always tend toward the meet-cutes and first kisses and get-togethers etc., and it just highlights...what I don’t have...more than is necessary or (probably) wise.

Today was one of those days that highlighted how single I am, and how much I need to change something - my job, my hangout spots, my church(??) - or else live with a trajectory of meeting nothing but married men and their children for the rest of my life.

(am I also kind of panicked/bitter because tomorrow will involved getting together with the high school friends, and every single one of them is dating/married?  yeah, yeah I am)

(what the actual fuck.  I'm thirty years old and have a flat-share, a job that does not constitute a career or pay particularly well, and no real prospects in sight.  ugh)

[iqpi]

I FOUND THE SOOTHING WATERCOLOR BRUSH; I think clip studio and I may have a longer term relationship after all

(art trade with MyChew from GO)

[to-the-fishies]

reasons i am crying at my desk: because apparently I can’t read the words “couples who J!” [ie, couples who watch Jeopardy! together] without feeling super-lonely all of a sudden?  what is this nonsense.

[to-the-fishies]

Sometimes classic rock is the only option on the radio, because familiarity blunts where it would sting.  No matter its subject, it doesn’t feel as lonely as every single pop song about people in love.

[wanderpaul-blog]

Una pa lang ‘to.

Bakit ba hindi mo makitang ikaw lang naman ang kailanga ko. Sa tuwing nakikita kita, feeling ko lumulitang ako. Hindi ko nga alam kung anong tawag dito. Baka nga adik nako sayo. Pero ang pangit naman diba, kasi hindi ka naman drugs. Kaso hindi ko mapigilang ma-fall sayo. Para kang bangin at ako naman eh walang kalaban-laban na bato na patuloy na bumabagsak sayo. Kaso di ko alam kung may sasalo samin sa dulo. Pero kahit anong mangyari, okay lang naman. Kasi bato ako; matigas, mabigat at higit sa lahat, minanhid na ng panahon...

[to-the-fishies]

There might not be any romance in my life, but there ARE two dozen e-mails from the library telling me my hold is ready for pickup.

[to-the-fishies]

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh.

Friend-getting-married-tomorrow had two people cancel last minute and thus has space for my roommate and I to bring dates.  Roommate is pleased, because the guy she likes agreed to go with her before we actually knew there’d be space for +1s. 

I tried calling the bloke that went about Ann Arbor with me (who has since been invited to this and that event).  But he is out of town this weekend...and apparently has a girlfriend now.

I’m feeling kind of cut up.  Not because he’s dating someone else - we ARE friends and I am pleased for him - but because it just makes me that little bit more certain that no one will ever be interested in me.

/goody, another wedding where I go with my brother, apparently.