#skoolwerk

[tootsaloots]

Dis gon teik 5evar #pan #garden #diagonal #paint #skoolwerk

[hauntedwithcompany]

If I can hold out for three more weeks, then I won't have to feel guilty about staying in bed until forever on Sundays. Until then, I'm hiding here from my schoolwork and taxes, inching closer to either resolve or panic with every passing minute.

[hauntedwithcompany]

I'm trying to acquire two more responses to the survey on which I'm working. If you would like to participate, send me a message. It's still open for anonymity, in case that's holding you back. Please and thank you in advance.

[hauntedwithcompany]

Anyone Want to Help Me with an Assignment?

It's for my Research Methods course. I need to collect data for a project and all that is required is for participants to answer two questions in a survey. Responses are entirely confidential and no identifying information will be shared. Send me a message if you want in. Anonymous responses allowed.

[hauntedwithcompany]

anxiā

This is Finals Week for my Statistics class. We have three chances, timed at four hours each, to complete the exam by Sunday. I had planned to come home and throw down my first attempt this evening, but work was so terrible that I knew I couldn't focus on something as important as this class. As a result, I've been slow roasting in my own anxiety over when I'll have enough time to knock this thing out and earn the grade of which I know I'm capable. Since it doesn't look like this is going to be a productive night, I'm going to talk to you guys about what anxiety feels like for me.

There is almost always something freaking me out. It's like my mind is Saturn and my near-constant worries are its rings- at any given moment, some new and stressful thought it always swirling around me. I worry about work, school, my car, and how money figures into all of it. I can calm my mind with assurances that I won't work at the same place for much longer, I can finish these last two classes if I just dedicate myself to it, and my car has been checked over enough times recently that it's fine, but every "it's ok" immediately gets booted out of the way by the "oh, but what if" of some new nightmare. People take medication for this kind of anxiety. Maybe they should. When I think about being prescribed something, I think that I shouldn't deaden these thoughts because I need to think them. I need to be thinking about how I'll handle all of these different things and what I can do now to prepare for later. When I try to express these thoughts, people don't know what to say. "Worry about it later", "Cross that bridge when you come to it", "There's nothing you can do about it now" probably all seem like valid platitudes to the people saying them, but to someone like me, they're as helpful as telling someone with stage fright not to be nervous or a person on the verge of tears not to cry. 

I feel like I put people in a bad spot to vent my concerns because, really, what is anyone supposed to tell me? I wouldn't even know what to tell me. Talking about how scared I am makes it real, something I can see for what it is. I'm not asking for advice or help or sympathy. I just want to say.

[hauntedwithcompany]

Grade-Nuts

During a meeting with one of my instructors last week, he told me that I seem to have a preoccupation with obtaining reassurance, a need to make sure I'm doing what is "right" and "good" too often, and that the world isn't so straightforward.

(Some kind of meeting, right?)

He doesn't have to know that I just refreshed the course's website a couple times, chanting "Grade me, grade me, GRADE ME" and waiting for my marks from the last assignment to post.

Look, Dennis Hopper strapped a bomb to my school stuff and said that it'll blow if my scores dip below 95. You don't want my transcript to explode, do you?

DO YOU?

[hauntedwithcompany]

I just finished all of my homework for the night and started singing this (as one might a wordless melody), then had to crank it and do a special dance that threatened to break the coffee table, splitting shards of glass into my forearms.

Worth it. Always worth it.

[hauntedwithcompany]

Mono Rules

That's a misleading title.

I learned awhile ago that one of the ways to get over mononucleosis, aside from just waiting, is to listen to your body. If you're tired, sleep. It's your body's way of telling you what will help you recover. I live by this when I'm working on school stuff and, as result, frequently take naps when I'm trying to finish a project. Today was no exception- I passed out for about an hour while I was trying to read a long article on synesthesia. Now I feel more alert and prepared to type the shit out of this term paper and be marginally ahead of the game.

Mono Rules, guys. Learn 'em. Live 'em. Love 'em(?).