Ok hear me out on this. I was watching TikToks and I nearly threw my phone across the room when this thought popped into my head. You know how juvenile birds (swans/chickens/ducks/and I presume fucking flamingos as well) have fluffy feathers until they shed those and their full adult feathers come in. What if that’s what’s happening to Vessel? He’s grown now 🥹 his fluffy downy feathers gone, replaced by sleek beautiful black feathers!
summary: new boyfriend!virgin!vessel thinks the world of you and can't think of a better way to show it than giving himself to you completely
vessel x fem!reader 𐙚
head's up/tags: switchy desperate lovesick vessel, sweet gone feral, smut with feelings, loss of virginity (lots of checking in and sensitivity), new established relationship, vessel is touch starved and simping, pet names (craziest one is puppy-girl tbh), p in v, dirty talk
Something Vessel didn’t tell you when you first matched on Tinder was that he was…well…how would he have even put it? Touch starved? Desperate? Needy? But you seemed to understand that. You were always holding hands while walking, or in a tight embrace if you were waiting at a crosswalk, or your legs and feet were touching while you sat. You get the idea. As much as he enjoyed the affection, he needed more. While he didn’t out himself as being, well, completely desperate for any kind of physical affection, he was upfront about being a virgin. Sure, he’d fooled around. He’d been blown plenty of times backstage and at parties…and yes he knows where the clitiros AND g-spot are, thank you for asking. But it never led to intercourse. In fact, it didn’t always lead to a relationship or a text back. A lot of times the timing was just off or the person was wrong for him or neither party wanted to. Which was completely understandable, but he had started to wonder if something was wrong with him. That was until he met you.
You were witty, kind, fun. Easy to talk to. And deeply into him. Vessel understood the allure of him. His aura and what came with it physically but otherwise he couldn't understand why you would want to stick around for more. Yeah sure he put himself out there on Tinder during a break from tour and he wanted the attention, but you…you were an angel. You made him take a step back and really consider what he’d been doing all this time. The drive to feel someone and something from others was strong for him. The sex he’d had wasn’t “consummating” by the wider society’s standards, and he was at peace with that, but he finally saw some truth in “saving yourself for the right person.” And it all came from a very sweet genuine place. He thought the world of you! But the other drive... To taste. To ravish. To fuck. That was very much running in the background.
When you two started having serious conversations about your histories and preferences, he was nervous. When he admitted that he’d never actually fucked someone, you chuckled just the tiniest bit, making him blush.
“What’s so funny?”
You just shook your head and looked past him, trying to keep a level head. “I’m not laughing at you. Just myself.”
“Oh. Why…at you?”
“Because I could have really fucked things up. Do you know how hard it is to be good around you? To not just…rip your clothes off every time you come over? To not immediately drop to my knees with my tongue out like a greedy little puppy-girl?” You paused and met his gaze. Poor guy was blushing and breathing like he’d been out in the heat. “I don’t want to scare you. It’s not like I would push you or anything, but I’m glad I know. If you’d ever like to…you know…do something with me. Just let me know. I think we could have a lot of fun together.”
And that’s when Vessel started loving you and simultaneously cursing you. Loving you because you were so sweet, and patient, and gorgeous, and fun, and thoughtful and and and(at this point whoever was listening would pat his shoulder and say, “we get it, mate, you’re whipped”). But he cursed the day he mentioned being a virgin to you because he couldn’t get that image out of his head: you on your knees, begging for his cock. You saw all his scars and flaws and still wanted him in the rawest, most basic way. That blew his mind.
…
On the night you two finally slept together, you stayed out later than usual. Probably past midnight. But you don’t care. He clung to you all night at that stupid party and tried to make out with you in the Uber like a horny teenager. It was adorable. He was adorable. Back at your place, you fiddle for your keys on the darkened porch, which was quite difficult with a giggly man clinging to you.
“Use your phone light,” Vessel says as he holds your waist and kisses your neck.
You let out a playful, exasperated sigh. “You use your phone light! My hands are full!” Finally the front door opens, and you both clamber in. Vessel’s hands find your waist again and pull you in for a frantic kiss. His hands can’t stay still as he clutches your plush ass but then trails all the way back up to grasp your hair. With a moan he pulls away.
“I think… I want to try it tonight.”
The giddiness and giggliness doesn’t stop once you fall onto your bed, making out and attempting to undress each other. Vessel kicks off his shoes and hesitantly moves away from you so he can take off his jeans. You lean back on your elbows, shaking your head softly. “So eager for me,” you chuckle.
He stands before you in his boxer briefs after he’s taken his shirt off, just taking in the sight of you. His fingers twitch by his side…and so does his cock. You like what you see and feel yourself propelled forward. Onto your knees. “Gonna take care of me, babe?” he asks with a shaky breath. He whimpers softly and bites his lip as you smirk up at him with a little smirk as your fingers lightly trace the waistband of his underwear and his happy trail. On the inside, he’s a mess. He feels the need to claim you as his. He doesn’t even really care about losing his virginity. Vessel just wants to know he’s been with you. The thought of screwing up tonight and not fucking you makes him cringe. He can’t take another night of fucking his stupid little fleshlight and sucking his own fingers pretending both holes are yours. When you ask if you can take his boxers off, he nods dumbly and bites his lip. He thinks he must have blacked out because suddenly your tongue glides from base to tip. Such a pretty smile on your face, too.
“Take your dress off. Please. Please, baby,” he pleads.You shake your head “no” with a little wink as you take his cock deeper into your mouth, nose almost touching him. “Fuck. My girl is talented,” he says as his chest starts to heave a little, “mmm please I…I want to see you.” He can barely get the words out as you let your tongue drag up the underside of his cock. As your lips pass over the head, Vessel’s panting turns into little whimpery moans. “Please.” You gaze up at him through half lidded eyes and see that he’s chewing on his lip and shaking…he wants to manhandle you. He needs to act out. “Fuck it.” Vessel takes your jaw in his hand and holds you so that you’re looking up at him.
“I am done begging. This is me telling you. Take your fucking dress off for me.”
His voice is firm. Dark. Lustful.
“Yes sir,” is all you can manage before pulling the straps down. You stand up and let the satin-y material pool around your tummy. Vessel curses and growls under his breath as his eyes trail down your bare chest, his hands then pulling your dress further down your plush waist and hips. The feeling of his thumbs hooking the waistband of your panties makes you gasp a little. Vessel just shakes his head and chuckles as he undresses you.
“You’ve already sucked my cock like it was nothing and yet me undressing you embarrasses you? And here…I thought you would be bossing me around tonight. You’ve folded, hm?”
“I uhm…heh.” You can’t even finish your thought as he pulls your hair back so you look straight up at him. “Got…got too excited I guess.”
“Hm,” he hums with amusement, “like a greedy puppy-girl. All bark…but you have any bite for me? Hmm?”
You stammer as he pushes you back on the bed. There’s something in how he maneuvers you that feels calculated. Practiced. “Ves…babe…? Are you sure you’ve never done this?”
He laughs as he lays atop you, his cock rubbing against your tummy. You can feel him quivering as your nude bodies touch for the first time. Vessel steadies his breath and whispers into your neck, “baby, if you had kept sucking me any longer I was going to lose it…but just because I’ve never been fucked doesn’t mean I don’t think about it.” His cock twitches between you both. “I know what I’m doing. And…dammit I know I’m going to just absolutely…” he pauses as his fingers mash against your clit “…drain myself so fast once I’m inside you. My pretty girl.” He trails wet, sucking kisses down your shoulder, breathing heavily as he poses a question. “I know you think about this. Has it made you cum?” You grit your teeth and whimper as his middle finger enters you and starts to fuck you.
“Veeeeessssss fuck, baby…s’not nice to ask me something…while you…fuck.” He’s relishing in you trying to answer as he adds a second finger. Your hips buck against his fingers as he kisses your forehead and coos about what a sexy little thing you are. You can’t help the whines coming from you as he pulls his fingers from your needy pussy. All sense in your head flies out the window when he sucks his fingers clean and tastes you for the very first time. “What happened to my sweet, timid boyfriend?” you ask breathlessly.
Vessel plants a soft, deep kiss on your lips as he nudges the head of his cock against your entrance. You find yourself giggling breathlessly as he peppers your face with kisses before he rubs his nose against yours and whispers. “Still him. Just taking what you’ve so very kindly offered me…fuck…you gonna let me in, love?”
You nod softly and whimper as he pushes in. A pathetic, throaty moan ripples through him as he bottoms out. You’d never been someone’s first. It was a bit surprising but very endearing to see him go from feral and touch starved to blushy and pussy-drunk. Vessel wants to move. To feel your hot body against his…to hear you…to kiss you…to have any simultaneous feedback. His lust reciprocated.
The instinct to care for him kicks in. You hold his face and whisper. “You feel so good inside me…you do baby…I want you so bad… Do you feel good?” His eyebrows knit together and he whimpers softly, wincing like he’s in pain. But he nods. “Do you want me to take care of you?” He nods again and buries his face in your neck. God his cock is throbbing hard inside you. Your hips buck sensually against him, riding from beneath.
“Oh…fuck…you’re actually…you’re fucking me…you’re fucking me…” he whimpers pathetically. He winces and bites his lip. “Stop, baby.”
“Are you ok?”
Vessel looks down at you with hazy, dreamy eyes and nods. “This is heaven. You are heaven.” His mouth goes to your nipple while he maneuvers one of your legs over his arm. “What did I do to deserve this…hm? Smart, beautiful girl with a perfect pussy…you shouldn’t have been single,” he whispers as he moves to kiss your lips. You both moan into the kiss, which makes his hips twitch. You feel the first tentative little thrusts and make sure to nod and “mhm” throughout the kiss to encourage him. He breaks the kiss, panting and quivering. You’re about to ask if he wants a break but he looks you dead in the eyes and gulps. “I love you, but I’m feeling a little overwhelmed. You’re driving me crazy. I’ve…I’ve wanted this for so long…and doing it with you I just…darling….” He trails off, thrusting slowly, making your eyes roll back from the stretch and feeling of his pubic bone meeting yours. You can tell he’s holding back. Holding his breath.
“Ves…Ves, babe…breathe with me. You’re ok…you feel so fucking good.”
“I can’t stand it…I have to…I need to…”
The look in his eyes betrays the sweet pout of his lips. He wants to claim you. Shape your insides to him. “Do it. I can take it.”
He growls in your ear with a little chuckle, “you’re not one of my toys. I don’t want to hurt you…” He takes a shaky breath and cups your breast with his free hand, his other resting above your head.
“I trust you. And love you. You look sexy up there, ya know?” You say with a smile, trying to lighten the mood. He responds with another chuckle and kisses you deeply. You both get lost in each other and then he finds his rhythm again. You have no concept of how long he actually lasts. And you don’t care. When he cums he keeps fucking it into you, his face buried in the crook of your neck as he cries out your name…little curses…broken moans.
The next morning, he spoons you. Pressing his morning wood against you and whining about how you didn’t cum last night. “I know I don’t know everything yet, babes, but maybe I could just poke around…play a little? Please?”
I'm having thoughts about Sleep Token (not unusual). This is probably going to be kind of rambling, and kind of a mix of band lore and more personal lore (no name spoilers or anything like that, just my own personal observations).
In my own personal interpretation of the Lore™, I usually start with Sundowning. The EPs and singles before that could certainly have meaning to Vessel within whatever lore he's constructed, but to me they seem tangential. And in a real world sense, they were just getting the band started, so they were probably just trying to put out music while working on making a full album, right?
Anyway, I think the key thing is what Vessel (or at least, the official social media accounts) have told us. The first three albums were a trilogy, yeah? Nothing lasts forever. New era. I read an analysis (sorry I don't have a source 🙏🏻) theorizing that the trilogy isn't necessarily chronological as much as it's... Rehashing the same events at different times. (Playing discordant days on repeat.) I think this works whether you're interpreting the lyrics as Lore™ or as a man writing about something so deeply personal it becomes... almost worshipful, in a way.
I see a lot of the five stages of grief in the first three albums. As many people who have dealt with trauma know, those stages aren't necessarily linear. After thinking about it for a bit, here are my thoughts:
Sundowning: denial, anger, lil bit of bargaining
This Place Will Become Your Tomb: depression, bargaining
Take Me Back to Eden: anger, beginnings of acceptance
I'm not going to go any deeper with that analysis in this post (could be persuaded to do so in another post...) and could certainly be interpreted in many ways. From a Lore™ perspective, all three albums could be pondering over and over a complex, unhealthy relationship with a deity. I really don't want to speculate too much about the man behind the mask, because I'm not comfortable doing so. For the sake of this post, I'll say this: I kind of doubt all three albums are about the same person. Could be! Kind of doubtful imo. I think that sometimes we keep surrounding ourselves with people who aren't good for us, and they end up hurting us in the same ways over and over. The cycle repeats, and each time the hurt goes deeper. It gets harder to believe it's not your fault. I'm projecting A LOT with that statement, to be completely honest.
I kind of lost my train of thought so moving right along to Even in Arcadia. From a marketing standpoint, they did a lot of work to make sure that this was very visually a new chapter for the band, and the music is certainly in line with that.
The two sides of my analysis:
Lore™, this one is heavily my own interpretation so take it as you will. In some mythologies, sleep and death are represented by similar or related deities. Take Hypnos and Thanatos, for example. There's a lot of death imagery throughout Sleep Token's music. Like, a lot. All kinds of it. Even a lot of the artwork has death imagery (fish skeletons in TPWBYT, reaper-like creature with a scythe in TMBTE). What if "Sleep" has been lying to Vessel this whole time? What if "Sleep" has actually been Death? And what if Vessel killed them after learning of their betrayal and took their place... As Sleep. (Am I walking with gods, etc.)
The last stage of grief is acceptance. I think we started to see that in Take Me Back to Eden (Euclid, mainly) but becomes the main focus of Even in Arcadia. Yes, there's certainly still grief and sadness in the lyrics. There's anger. But it feels more... Past tense, to me. Reflective. The difference between going through something and being tormented by it and having passed through it and seeing it more clearly from the other side. Not invalidating how you felt, or forgetting it happened, but being able to take the first steps away from it as a new, slightly bruised, but healing person.
I've already gone on longer than I meant to so I'll wrap it up. I think we've all noticed that Vessel seems a bit lighter this tour, and that's wonderful. I hope that he's doing well, and enjoying this well-earned success.
