#sneep

[estashit]

those cauldrons won't know what hit them

[fafodill]

Sneep is baby 🤍

He is 🤍

[sneppu]

One of my silly headcanons is that Arthur Weasley is forever fond of Snape, because once upon a time, at some mandatory order event, Snape ended up explaining in a bit too much detail, exactly how one might go about stealing a muggle car the muggle way such that the ministry would not be alerted.

[notamalfoy-justagirl]

Severus Snape with back pain

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[blueboxfive]

Thank you @sevfan for this amazing commission! 😍🤣

Inspired by

[achingless]

The Marauders should call each other Tape Measure, Pliers, Wrench, and Pencil. Tape Measure for Moony, a retractable ruler, because Perfect Remus knows the rules yet has no spine. Pliers for Prongs; pliers look vaguely like antlers and James needs nothing less than pliers to ply his head out of his ass. Wrench for Wormtail; a wrench in the Light side's plans and can be a play on "wench". And Pencil for Padfoot; as a 40-something year old man who still uses insults like Snivellus, he gets the lamest tool in a tool box.

The Marauders are tools, is what I'm trying to say.

[er-idkhehe]

can we have a universe where Severus Tobias Snape WINS.

a loving, understanding father. Who did NOT get drunk etc.

Had quite a few friends.

was NOT considered ugly. (He can look the same. But not SEEN as ugly)

was not bullied from the moment he stepped foot in the Hogwarts train.

was NOT hung upside down and sexually assaulted.

was NOT almost mauled to death by a werewolf

was NOT forced to become a death eater.

Did NOT accidentally call his friend the m word.

Did NOT have the dark Lord target his best friend.

did not have his BEST FRIEND die.

with her husband and baby.

Was NOT made to be a double agent.

and died of old age.

etc

[purpleocean19]

Headcanon #6 (y/n edition — part 2)

[Part Two – Same Scene, Minutes Later. Lockhart has retreated to the farthest armchair, nursing his bruised ego. Y/N and Severus are still mid-flirt across the staff room like two dangerously attractive dragons in a chess match of sarcasm and mutual pining. Both Flitwick and Dumbledore are pretending to read, while Sprout is pretending not to watch, and Minerva is simply over it and just wants to quite literally scream at them to "Just kiss already!", but alas, refrains herself from doing so.]

Sprout (whispering to Flitwick): Do you think they know we can all hear them.... flirting?

Flitwick (grinning): At this point, I'm just waiting for a wedding invitation and some strong fire-whiskey.

Minerva (sipping her tea calmly): Finally

[Everyone turns to stare at her.]

Minerva: What? I’ve had a betting pool running since last term. I’m not getting any younger — someone needs to kiss before Voldemort does something dramatic again.

Severus (not looking up): You do realize I can hear you?

Minerva (without missing a beat): Good. Then perhaps you'll speed things up before the prophecy turns into a prophecy about your repressed feelings.

[Y/N chokes on her tea. Severus just smirks, eyes flicking sideways toward her.]

Severus (to Y/N): It seems we’ve become entertainment.

Y/N (cheeky): Better than Lockhart’s autobiography readings.

Lockhart (offended): I’ll have you know Magical Me is a bestseller—

Severus (cutting in): So is doxy repellent. Doesn’t mean we enjoy it at the dinner table.

[Staff room erupts into barely suppressed laughter. Y/N’s cheeks are flushed, and Severus leans back, smug and cool — as always.]

Minerva (deadpan, whispering to the others): Ten galleons says they’re dating before the next staff meeting.

Flitwick: I’ll raise you fifteen if she makes the first move.

Dumbledore: Oh dear, they still haven't kissed yet? Oh well, 50 galleons say they confess after a near-death experience. They seem like the 'slow-burn' types.

Severus (rolls his eyes before speaking dryly to Y/N): Care to split the winnings?

Y/N (grinning): Only if the prize includes dinner in Hogsmeade.

Severus (with a rare smirk): Done.

~End of part 2~