#so-called experts

[pressradio]

Have you noticed how narrative changed, huh?

[xzacloudx]

Contractors: 100% Failure Rate

Man, my family has never once had good luck with contractors. We've gone through two for making footers/foundation for our doublewide mobile home back in the country (the first of whom poured four-inch thick "cookies" when we needed a minimum of two FEET deep, the other who left his material out in the rain so it got ruined then tried to charge us for extra parts), three to repair a leaking roof at mine n sis's house (STILL leaks), one to put linoleum flooring in our bathroom (he kinked it several times, then 'fixed' it by gluing patches onto it that are predictably lifting at the edges and cutting our feet)...

Now, Mom tried to get a garage/outbuilding put in, having done the foundation herself with my brothers' help to save money and ensure it was done right. All the contractors had to do was drill in holes so poles could be inserted into the ground, then add the siding and roof and garage doors. Mom specified light gray siding, with a dark roof.

Well... they switched the sidings around so it has dark siding and a light roof. And... here's the kicker: They ran into an obstacle on the last hole they were drilling. And rather than dig in and move the rock out of the way or whatever and complete the drilling... They decided to raise all the walls instead. So the poles that were supposed to go into the ground, are now resting on top of decorative custom bricks... that they STOLE from Mom's pile meant for fixing our patio (she had them counted out specifically to have enough, so now she no longer has enough)... then on one side the siding juts out crookedly around the bricks and looks terrible, while on the other side they clumsily cut around the bricks.

Then apparently had the gall to stand back and nod and say "Yup, we did a good job we can be proud of!" and left. A strong enough wind could blow the whole thing over!

Mom's gonna start dealing with them in the morning. I wish her the best of luck.

Cuz so far, we've never been successful in getting refunds or taking the other contractors to court for all the times we've been screwed over. I hope this time will be different.

Scratch that... ONE of the roof contractors was told she had to refund a small portion of the money we paid her. She has yet to pay a cent, and apparently for small claims, the courts can’t do much to make her. Closest we've come to justice. :/

The rest of the contractors couldn't be found (disappeared or changed their names), or the judges ruled against us despite overwhelming evidence. The floor guy, the more he tried to fix things, the more he kept screwing up, and we had to keep paying for replacement flooring each time, so we eventually just told him to go away and paid him so he'd shut up. We shouldn’t have, but we were just so... TIRED of all this. So very, very tired.

I hope Mom won’t bow down in this case. She shouldn’t have to pay for replacement siding, because it’s THEIR fault it needs a complete do-over. They need to return her bricks and replace any if they’re damaged. And they need to put the damn poles into the ground where they belong!

It’s friggin sad that we’ve ended up having to do so much work with building, renovating, wiring, plumbing ourselves over the decades. Fainting from heatstroke and wrapping up injuries and learning as we went, trial and error, taking weeks to do what experts could do in a day. But we’ve HAD to, because not a single contractor in our collective pool of experience has been able to do the job that they were TRAINED to do, and do PROFESSIONALLY for a LIVING!

NOT!

ONE!

That’s not encouraging. That makes the thought of American workmanship look like utter crap. That doesn’t help me believe that people CARE about the work they do. It’s just so frustrating and disillusioning and... ugh. I just don’t want to see people in my family screwed over yet again when we’ve never had a lot of money, and lost what little we saved to scammers who can’t do their ONE JOB.

Sorry for the rant. My new antidepressants are slowly starting to help me feel emotions again... just in time for a good reason for me to experience “well and truly pissed off” once more. :/

[pointless-letters]

Okay...... 1) "Simply abolish cash" to stop tax evasion.....Do the big tax evading multinationals do a lot of cash-in-hand work then, Brian? 🤔 2) Muggers will still mug people, Brian, for stuff like their phones, iPads, cameras etc. They might even still mug people for their cards and their PIN numbers. 3) Isn't benefit fraud a tiny, tiny amount of the overall benefit bill? (I'm sure I remember seeing something that said that more was paid out in admin errors than was paid out to fraudulent claims) 4) How will it stop illegal immigration, exactly? Because if you're going to illegally come to a country and (presumably) find work illegally then you'll, what, stop short at getting fake documents and opening a bank account? Or just using someone else's?

[autistichedgehog]

Seeing a lot of posts about this today, so I thought I'd put my experience out there. My psychiatrist specializes in ASD, and basically told me that I'm autistic (he said something noncommittal like "An autistic woman with your background might look like you"), but because I can just barely function in society, he won't diagnose me with it because he thinks I'll use it as some kind of crutch. I'm already applying for disability due to anxiety issues, I don't see how it could make anything worse.

[autistichedgehog]

I saw another ask about therapists being ignorant, and thought I'd share my story. I went to my therapist with inquiries about looking into ASD for me, and she said "But you talk?" I couldn't believe it. "You have a boyfriend, though?" was another gem she threw my way, alongside other incredibly ableist things. It seems that if you're not specialized in ASD, most therapists are completely clueless.

Yes, it does indeed seem that way. What saddens me the most is how few specialists in ASD there are for adults. Autism is not new, not in the least. Not only that, but almost 20 years ago when I was diagnosed, they were already finding a lot of autistic adults who’d fallen through the cracks because they passed well enough. None of this is new information and it should be something there are competent therapists and psychiatrists for. That there isn’t distresses me deeply. 

[autistichedgehog]

My therapist said she didn't think I'm autistic despite matching up with most of the traits because I'm "capable of emotional relationships". I just needed to tell someone this.

I’ve gotten a bunch of these in my inbox tonight. I am so, so sorry that so many people go through this crap. I mean, I experienced something similar when I made an attempt to move to an adult psychiatrist when I turned 18 (and ended up with my pediatric psychiatrist right up until I left for Sweden five years ago) but I really hoped that was an isolate incident. Running AH has taught me it isn’t, and that kills me. 

[autistichedgehog]

my therapist told me i wasn't autistic because i speak well (i'm gifted and my area of skill is language) and "show emotion and empathy" is she bullshitting me or was she right?

I’m alarmed by the amount of these questions I get. Holy crap, what are they teaching psychiatrists and psychologists these days? (Fellow Hedgies, that was rhetorical.)

I don’t know if I’d say she was bullshitting you…more like she’s ignorant as fuck. She’s not right. She’s wrong. Bad wrong. Badong. Just like allistics, we have all kinds of skills and talents, and we certainly don’t lack emotion or empathy. That’s an unfortunate bit if ignorance that’s been spread around for far too long. Maybe your therapist needs to read up on things like the Intense World theory. Times, they are a’changing. 

[autistichedgehog]

["Autistics have no imagination." "Autistics live in their own little world."

WOULD YOU PEOPLE MAKE UP YOUR GODDAMNED MINDS!?]

One of my favorite* of the constant contradictions "experts" like to spew about autistic people.

Tell me something, experts. If I have no imagination, how do I live in my own little world? What exactly would I even do there? How is it even possible to be absorbed in one's "own little world" without an imagination to take one there in the first place? 

"Experts," it's time to just admit that you think we're all brainless husks that sit around staring into space because we lack the capacity for thought. Sure, it's tasteless and makes you look like a horrible person (and you are) but at least it's a lot more honest and a lot less contradictory. 

P.S. I don't live in my "own little world." I live in lots of them, and they're rarely little. You jelly?

*By favorite I mean "most laughably asinine."