Blog Entry 8: Sociological Perspectives (Symbolic Interactionism, Looking Glass Self, and Dramaturgy)
The topic had gotten to me quite a bit, as I recognized a lot of things about myself while learning about these. I didn’t pay much attention to Symbolic Interactionism at first, since I simply associated it with things like emojis, hand gestures, and the like where interpretations are straightforward and too… general, to want to pay attention to. Then, I had realized it goes into more than just those. We assign meaning and interpretations to things such as facial expressions and body movements, and one fascinating thing is we can have our own interpretations of certain movements, but our interpretations can be wildly different from another’s due to how each of us developed our ways of thinking differently. I could associate a person not replying to me on Facebook as them not being interested in wanting to talk to me, since I am used to active online chatting and getting to know someone online. However, the other person may not be as bothered by it, because they just don’t prefer talking online and are more comfortable talking in person. The fact that we can put different meanings into the same event or reaction makes it difficult sometimes to read a situation, but it also forces you to become more open-minded and learn to not assume either the extreme positive or extreme negative realities of a situation.
The Looking Glass Self is nicely named, as it first immediately grabbed my attention as I am a big fan of Alice In Wonderland. Once we had gotten into it, I came to realize just how much I focus on this process of self-development, as a lot fo what I do, what I approve of myself or what I change about myself is due to how I want to be viewed by other people, even if I say I’m doing it for myself. I find a lot of pride in my ability to do things, such as being adequate at singing or painting, or doing well in school, because others praise me for it. It’s a little sad to admit, as I wish I could say I was proud of myself simply because I liked my own work, but honestly it’s not really the case. I am quick to find flaws in my works, but I am able to move past it and enjoy what I do because I know that even if I don’t like it, a lot of other people do. My love for anime and kpop and fangirling stems from me genuinely enjoying them, yes, but it is also fueled by me seeing how other people who do the same are seen as comfortable with who they are enough to express their love for something without being embarrassed, and I think, hey, I want to be just like that.
I get a little confused sometimes as to whether the looking glass self means that you judge yourself based on what you think other people think of you, or if you judge yourself based on how you see yourself in someone else, and how you change based on whether or not you like that, but I think the theory involves both. As it focuses on how you view yourself based on your “reflection” in other people.
Dramaturgy was a new term for me, but not a new concept. Acting differently based on who you’re talking to is something I’m very familiar with. As I was growing up, I had to be very careful with how I presented myself in front of my parents, in front of my friends, in front of everyone. I had to act a different way in front of all of them in order for them to consider me as “acting normally”. This way of living soon got to me, and when I’m by myself, in the backstage, I began to question what kind of person I actually was. Who was I? Which representation of myself was actually closest to being the most genuine?
I got tired after a while of having to keep up a front, especially different fronts when it came to the people closest to me. As I got older, and became more comfortable with sharing my thoughts to my parents and siblings without being afraid of them disapproving, I began to portray a similar image to them as I do with my friends. I became more vocal about my thoughts on things, my love for different bands and styles, I was open about how I reacted to things I disliked, and soon enough I began to see what kind of person I really am, because I had less fronts to keep up. The only fronts I keep up are with those I wasn’t close with, but with those I was, I’m very comfortable acting the same way. And I am rather proud of this, as I’d like to consider it as me knowing who I am.
