Discover Top Posts Tagged with #soft gatekeeping

Criticism is tolerated — so long as it doesn’t disrupt the perfectly curated consensus.

Since a Big Blogger™ offering writing wisdom decided to delete my comment, I’ll post it here instead — because honestly, that act speaks louder than any neatly worded advice.

Here’s what I wrote:

Funny how some people talk about 'newbies' with kindness while still keeping them outside the door — like they’re not ready to be heard until they’ve paid some imaginary dues. I’ve read ‘new’ writers who sound like thunder, and 'veterans' who echo like empty rooms. No — I don’t think you can tell who’s experienced and who’s not just from a fic. And maybe you shouldn’t try.

—I’m the big bad wolf.

Deleting Dissent won't delete The Conversation

Being 'called out' for having a thin skin (intended as a gotcha) is an accomplishment. It's a valued skill and tool for many artists and writers.

Deleting comments for rubbing you the wrong way, labeling them as haters or trolls simply because they challenge the status quo or don't shower you with compliments, is on you. By doing so, you not only dismiss their time and serious engagement. But also deny yourself the opportunity to grow and learn.

That approach will come back to bite you. It impacts your reputation as a blogger because maintaining a blog isn't just about broadcasting—it's about interaction. If you can't practice what you preach, that inconsistency will become evident quickly. Most especially when the comments are thoughtful, analytical, and contribute to the discussion.

As long as they adhere to guidelines and aren't rude or threatening, your reasons for silencing them don't hold water.

Citing mental health as a blanket justification doesn't align with therapeutic practices; no CBT therapist advocates for avoiding challenging discussions. They emphasize doing the work, facing discomfort, and consistent self-exposure.

And to be clear: I'm not impeding anyone's right to manage their comment section. That's their prerogative. But they can't expect to control the broader conversation or demand my silence on social media.

So let’s collectively agree to keep hypocrisy in the exception percentile — and not mistake it for the rule.

Source: Should bloggers delete comments that disagree with them?