When I was a baby gay new in LA in the 2010s, I took one scriptwriting class and proceeded never to do anything with it. But I've been inspired recently so sharing this snippet from a Half Man AU I've excised from my mind. Heavy on the AU. Not formatted properly bc idk how to do that here.
GLASGOW 1991
EXT. PARK – SUMMER EVENING
The football has finished, though you’d never know it from the noise still drifting across the city.
It’s one of those Scottish summer evenings where the sun seems reluctant to leave. The light hangs low over the park, turning everything gold.
Niall (20) and Ruben (21) wander along the path, pleasantly drunk after an afternoon at a beer garden. Neither is in any hurry to get home.
NIALL
…I’m telling ye, if they’d started McStay—
RUBEN
Ye’ve been telling me that since pint number three.
NIALL
Because I’m right.
RUBEN
Because you’re pished.
Niall laughs.
They walk a little further.
NIALL
Hang on.
RUBEN
No.
NIALL
Aye.
RUBEN
We’re nearly home.
NIALL
Should’ve reminded me before the last pint then.
Ruben snorts.
Niall veers off the path towards a clump of bushes.
RUBEN
Pure class.
He wanders over to a park bench and climbs onto the back of it, balancing there without thinking.
He waits.
A dog tears across the grass after a tennis ball.
Somewhere nearby, someone is trying to sing Flower of Scotland. Poorly.
Niall emerges from behind the bushes, fastening his shorts as he walks back, entirely unselfconscious.
Ruben looks. Then keeps looking.
It’s his shirt.
Niall nicked it months ago and, somewhere along the way, it stopped feeling borrowed.
The sleeves are rolled to his forearms. It hangs loosely over his frame. The rugby shorts he’s wearing are slightly too small.
Ruben realises, a fraction too late, that he’s staring.
Niall catches him.
NIALL
What?
Ruben nods towards the shirt.
RUBEN
That’s mine.
Niall glances down, as though he’s genuinely checking.
NIALL
…Is it?
RUBEN
Aye.
Niall smiles almost flirtatiously.
NIALL
Honestly…I don’t know anymore.
Ruben hops down from the bench.
Falls into step beside him.
A small smile creeps across his face.
RUBEN
Aye.
Ye don’t.
They carry on through the park, shoulder to shoulder.
The conversation picks up exactly where they left it. The path narrows as they leave the city centre. The noise from the football crowd has softened into a distant hum.
For a while, neither of them says anything. They’re too pleasantly drunk for silence to feel awkward.
RUBEN
Still think Scotland were robbed?
NIALL
Aye.
RUBEN
Even after seven pints?
NIALL
Especially after seven pints.
Ruben laughs.
RUBEN
Ye’re hopeless.
Niall bumps him with his shoulder.
NIALL
You still came out with me.
RUBEN
Somebody had to stop ye arguing football wi’ strangers.
They walk on.
Ruben stuffs his hands into his pockets.
Almost as an afterthought—
RUBEN
Where’s… what’s-his-face?
Niall glances over.
NIALL
Who?
RUBEN
Martin.
NIALL
Oh. We broke things off.
Ruben nods.
They keep walking.
RUBEN
Shame. He seemed alright.
NIALL
He was.
Just…wanted a lot.
RUBEN
Oh did he, aye?
Niall lets the comment pass.
RUBEN
I noticed ye stopped bringing blokes over.
NIALL
Aye…
RUBEN
Why?
Niall shrugs.
NIALL
Dunno, just wasn’t working out.
They walk another few paces.
RUBEN
He was your…
Fifth boyfriend? In about four months?
Niall stops and turns to face him.
NIALL
Ruben…
RUBEN
I’m no’ judging.
Just observing.
NIALL
I’m not a tart.
A smile flickers across Ruben’s face.
RUBEN
Didn’t say ye were.
NIALL
Then why mention it?
Ruben doesn’t answer.
Instead—
RUBEN
Did ye sleep wi’ all of them? I know you did with Martin and that posh prick, Barnaby…
Niall blinks.
NIALL
Why does that matter?
RUBEN
Just answer me, Bambi. Did ye?
Niall studies him intently. In no rush to answer.
Ruben begins to regret asking.
NIALL
Why?
Are ye jealous?
Ruben stops.
For a split second, instinct takes over and he squares up to Niall.
Then his bravado disappears but he doesn’t look away.
He looks Niall straight in the eye.
Certain. Certain enough that it almost frightens him.
RUBEN
Jealous? Why would I be jealous?
I know…
…none of them are me.
They don’t know how to fuck you like I do.
Why else did ye go through them so fast?
Niall is completely taken aback. Processing Ruben’s words as if they were the most obvious thing in the world.
And because Ruben is right.
Neither of them knows what to do with that.
After a long moment, Ruben starts walking again.
Niall follows.
The rest of the walk home passes without another word.
