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i swear i could get hit by a car and my mom would come up to me and say, “look, this happened because you wear too much makeup. can’t see in front of you with all that eyeliner and mascara over your eyes.”
warning: Rant ahead!
who else hates making malawah (somali pan cakes) for the whole fam? , dont get me wrong , my malawah is the bomb, all red and stuff but making it is just a hustle especially if you have many brothers who will be stealing them off the plate as soon as you put it there (not to forget mentioning they still want to have their original share when its dinner time). these niggas make me wanna be a ninja and sucka punch em all while they be swallowing it. lool jk . Not! i’m out.
when you can’t wear dirac to a wedding because your mom wants to deprive you from more cultural ties
18 year old me.
Me: ::breaths:: Mother: Uf, what is that smell? Oh god, Why is she a slob, she'll never learn to take care of herself, how will she ever find a husband ? Oh my god, I raised a failure daughter, why can't she learn to clean the house properly? I will be old one day but my adult daughter will live in the house and still won't know which sock matches from the laundry.
when Hooyo cooks bariis but there's no moos
Hoyo why you do me like that
Even when the house is clean as hell my mum still finds something for me to clean. The other day she told me to clean behind the couches. Like who's really gonna come visit us and look behind every couch
I'm not even that dark but since I'm the darkest in my family next to my dad I have to constantly have my mom try to bleach me uhm? And she doesn't understand why I could care less it's not like I'm persecuted the way some black folk are first of all she's lucky she can out light skin her and everyone else can pass for some kind of Egyptian/Syrian/Sudanese so she shouldn't even be trying to project her colourism on me but wtf I'm your child and not even 18 let me breathe. I spent so long hating my skin more like nah man black is beautiful and I'm black and I'm beautiful.
Ok but seriously tho, these somali "moos" jokes are getting boring now, JUST STOP.
