Sonny Carisi x Reader (I)
Request: Sonny x Reader. They’ve just had a baby and things are going really well but then Y/N’s name comes up in an investigation as a potential victim. How will Sonny react?
Warnings: Mentions of Reader being sexually assaulted
Sonny Carisi was content with his life. He hated how busy he was with his job, but he was always satisfied to put another scumbag away where they couldn’t hurt anyone else. And more than anything, he was happy with his home life. He had a beautiful wife, Y/n, and a new daughter, Y/d/n. He’d taken a week off work to help Y/n with Y/d/n, and was returning to work today.
“Fin, Rollins. Glad to see that the place didn’t fall apart without me.” Rollins laughed. “It came close, but we managed to scrape by. How’s Y/n and Y/d/n?” Sonny nodded. “They’re both good. I’ve got pictures if anyone’s interested.” He pulled out his phone. “Maybe if there’s time later, Sonny. For now, we just caught a case,” Olivia said.
The young woman was lying in a hospital bed, her face towards the wall. Rollins knocked lightly on the door before walking in with Carisi. “Hey, are you Alice?” The young woman turned her head to face the two of them, and nodded. “I’m Amanda, and this is Sonny. We’d like to ask you a few questions, if that’s okay with you.” “No.” She shook her head. “No, it’s not okay.” Amanda frowned, but looked sympathetic. “Honey, I know this isn’t easy –” Alice shook her head again. “No, you don’t. Get out. Both of you, get the hell out of here.”
“That went well,” Amanda said. Sonny huffed. “Yeah, well…. Hopefully she’ll come around at some point.” Amanda nodded. “She better.”
The two of them went to Barba’s office and met up with Fin and Olivia there. “Do we have any leads,” Barba asked the partners as they walked in. “No, and our vic isn’t talking, either,” Amanda said. “What do we know about the men in her life,” she asked. “She’s got a husband,” Fin replied. “Low-life, but never accused of any kind of abuse.” “Dig,” Barba said. “If it’s there, someone will know about it.”
“Hey, baby.” You stood on your toes and kissed your husband’s cheek. “How was your first day back at work?” He shrugged. “Stressful. We’ve got this girl who got beat up pretty badly and assaulted, but she won’t admit to who did it. We think her husband, so we’re going through his history now to find anyone else he may have done this to. How was your day? How was Y/d/n?” You smiled. “She was good. She slept a lot. Ate every couple of hours.” Sonny nodded. “You were able to get around okay? You weren’t in too much pain?” You nodded. “I was okay, baby. Sit down, I’ll throw some of that lasagna you made last week in the microwave.”
At the opening of the business day, the squad was sitting in Barba’s office. “So, who can we contact that has been in association with this man?” Rollins pulled out a sheet of paper. “Well, there’s not much to go on. He started dating this woman – Alice – in high school. Had one girlfriend before her. Apparently they were pretty serious. They talked about getting married, but her parents thought they were too serious for high schoolers so they broke up instead.” “What’s her name?” “Uh….” Amanda looked at the sheet again. “What’s wrong,” Carisi asked, looking over her shoulder.
“You’re home early,” you said, giving your husband a peck on the cheek. “Look at you, out for a week, home on time yesterday, home for lunch today…. You are home for lunch, right?” Sonny was being quiet, and avoiding looking at your face. “Sonny?” “Is the baby asleep?” “Um…yeah, but she should be waking up soon to be fed.” He nodded. “We have somewhere we need to go.”
Sonny, Y/n, and Y/d/n ended up at Barba’s office. “What’s – what’s wrong? Sonny, have you been getting threats?” Everyone’s eyes were on you, except for your husband’s. “Sonny….” You didn’t want to fight in front of his co-workers, but could he not at least look at you? “No, Sonny hasn’t been getting threats,” Olivia said. “Actually, we wanted to talk to you. Your name came up in an investigation.” “Mine? But….” Barba opened a case file, even though he’d memorized the names in it. “Alice Williamson has been sexually assaulted and beaten. We’re thinking it’s her husband, Matthew Williamson.” He looked up from his file. “Does that name mean anything to you?” You stood there, frozen; your mind still repeating only the words Sonny knows, Sonny knows, Sonny knows. When you were silent, Sonny spoke for the first time. “Do you know him?” “Yes,” you whispered. He turned to look at you. “Did he ever hurt you?” You pulled the baby closer to you, and she started to quietly whimper. Sonny instinctively held his arms out for her, and you handed her over. “Yes.” You were so quiet that no one could hear you. “I’m sorry?” You nodded. “Matthew. I know him. He – he dated me in high school for, like, a year and he – he –” “He raped you.” Sonny was looking straight at you. “Yes.”
You didn’t remember how you ended up in the bathroom. You heard the door open and turned to see who it was. “Olivia. I’m fine.” “You’re crying.” You shook your head. “He – he must be so mad.” The door opened again, and you heard a familiar voice. “Everyone decent?” Panic momentarily flared up in you again, but you nodded, and Olivia called out to Carisi that yes, everyone was decent.
You heard the door shut, and saw that you and Carisi were alone in the restroom. “Sonny…I, um –” But you didn’t know how to finish the sentence, so you simply let your voice trail off. “You what?” And you still didn’t know how to answer. “I just…I didn’t want you to know.” That much was true. “Why not?” You just shook your head, wiping at your eyes. You still thought about him and it sometimes, but not as often as you used to…but you found that every time it crossed your mind, it felt immediate. Scary. Dark. And so you kept busy. You moved as far away from your old hometown as you could, all the way to New York City. You settled down with a good man, had a baby. You worked a good job, and did some housewife tasks, too. You stayed as far away from thinking about it as you possibly could. You never told your husband, you didn’t see the point. You were fine. At least, that’s what you told yourself. You opened your mouth to try to explain yourself to him, but all that came out was a small sob. The anger in Sonny’s eyes completely disappeared, and he held out his arms for you. You took a tentative step towards him, but shut your eyes when he put his hand on your forearm. “I’m sorry,” you managed. He pulled his hand back. “It’s okay,” he said softly. “Hey, hey, hey, it’s okay. Let’s sit down, okay?” You sat on the floor, and Sonny crouched down, a few feet from you. “Hey, it’s okay.” You shook your head, keeping your eyes on your husband’s hand. “You don’t want to get…him on you,” you said, in a shaky voice. Sonny frowned. “I won’t, doll. You can come here. You don’t have to, though. You can stay right there if you want.” You looked at him, and let him hold you. “Sonny, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” you sobbed into his shirt. “Doll,” he murmured, stroking your hair. “It’s okay. It’s okay. You’re okay. I’m right here, and I’m not goin’ anywhere, okay, doll?”
It took you a few minutes, but you calmed down. You gently pulled back from your husband, wiping dried tears and streaks of mascara off of your cheeks. You stood up, facing a mirror, trying to clean the rest of the streaked makeup off of your cheeks. Sonny stood up, and wetted a paper towel. “Here ya go.” You took it, wiping the mascara from your cheeks and taking a dry paper towel to dry your cheeks off. “Thanks, Sonny.”
You turned and faced your husband. “I’m sorry.” Sonny looked at you. He nodded. “I know.” “I, um…I didn’t tell you ‘cause I, uh…I just wanted to avoid it.” Sonny looked sympathetic – you figured that he must have heard this story a hundred times before. “We can talk about it later, if you want.” “No.” You shook your head. “I wanna talk now.” “You sure, doll?” “I’m sure!” You took a deep breath. “I’m sure.” There was a brief pause. “What do you want to know?”
Sonny paused. “Sonny.” He bit his lip and looked away. “Sonny,” you repeated, a little more insistently. “Do you not trust me, doll?” You laughed, but in a watery way. “Of course I trust you.” “Why didn’t you tell me?” “I wanted to avoid it.” “Did you ever think about it?” You looked away, sniffling a little. “Some.” Your voice cracked. He nodded. “Why didn’t you come to me?” You shrugged. “I just…I mean…you hear this story at least twice a day. You told me, the first time you told me you loved me, that I was light. I wanted to be something you wanted to come to, not…not just more work.” He looked at you. “You’re not work.” You laughed again, blinking. “Am I not?” “No.” He was quiet, just looking at you, and you just looked back. “You’re not goin’ anywhere?” “No.” You nodded. “Thank you,” you whispered. “Hey, look at me, doll. I told you for better or for worse, and I meant that. I’m here. No matter what. I’m not sayin’ we’re done talking about this, but we don’t have to talk about it all right now, okay?”
A few minutes later, still sniffling slightly, Sonny led you back to Barba’s office. He stopped right outside the door. “You sure about this, doll?” You nodded, and squeezed his hand. You walked in with your husband. “You okay?” Rollins sounded sympathetic, and you felt everyone’s eyes on you: Amanda, Olivia, Fin, and Barba. It felt overwhelming, but Sonny gently put his hand on your back. You took a deep breath, and looked at the lawyer. “What do you need to know, Mr. Barba?”
