can you please explain to me how fantasy hockey works? I would love to have my own little team next season but I just don’t understand how it works 😭
ok so this is my first season doing fantasy hockey!! i am by nooooo means an expert.
we are using ESPN fantasy. i already had an account from March Madness Bracket challenges in the past, so i didn't have to make a new one. we only have four people in the league i'm in: cappy, hanz, me, and one of hanz's hometown friends (who, btw, hasn't lost a week yet... but i'm kicking his BUTT now that i know how to use fantasy). in other years, i'm probably going to want to have more people in the league– or maybe we all could do a league together next season! it would be soooo cutie to have a little puck-luck league.
drafting involves setting a date and time where everyone is available to make picks (which is why it would be really difficult for a puck-luck league to exist, sigh), then you choose your picks in a pre-determined order: person a, b, c, d, d again, c, b, a, a again... etc. each person in my league chose 9 forwards, 5 defense, 1 utility, 5 bench players, and 2 goalies. hanz somehow chose 3 goalies, so i think she only has 8 forwards. there is also a spot for an IR player: mine is currently taken up by Mr. Mattias Samuelsson... the man with glass bones. i cannot drop him because i love him.
you can add/drop players at any time (unless they're actively playing a game). cappy is a fucking menace when it comes to add/drop, whereas i've only dropped one player in order to clear my IR spot for Titibear. if you want to know about add/drop in fantasy... go ask cappy. i don't do it enough to know about it.
there IS a list of "undroppables," which are predetermined by ESPN. there are 4 players from each position under undroppables, and three goalies. The list is as follows (the players on MY team are highlighted in green): (C) McDavid, Draisaitl, Matthews, MacKinnon. (LW) Panarin, B. Tkachuk, J. Robertson, Ovechkin. (RW) Rantanen, Pastrnak, M. Tkachuk, Kucherov. (D) Josi, Makar, Fox, Q. Hughes. (G) Shesterkin, Hellebuyck, Valisevskiy. SO, even if i wanted to, which i DON'T, i would not be able to drop draisaitl, mackinnon, ovechkin, or hellebuyck.
each day you have to move players from your bench to your active roster IF THEY ARE PLAYING. you want your players with games today to be in one of your forward or defense spots– example: Cole Caufield is not playing today. He was one of my forwards last night. Sidney Crosby IS playing today. He was not playing last night, so he was on my bench. I moved Sidney to Cole's forward spot, now Cole is on my bench. Tomorrow morning, I will move my players around again.
Every week, you face someone from your league and get points throughout the week. Whoever's team has the most points wins. If there are an odd number of people in your league, one person has a bye week. The bye week rotates. Cappy is currently on her bye week for ANOTHER league, but since our league only has four people, we play each other constantly. I faced Cappy last week and I beat her, since my team scored 162.8 points, while hers only scored 90.7. there were a lot of games last week, so that's why there were so many points... my current status is 73.6 vs. my opponent's 54.1, and there are three days remaining for us to score points (friday's games, saturday's games, and sunday's games). then, i will face a new opponent for the next week.
i hope my NOT brief explanation of fantasy hockey helped you! it was super fun to type this out. i may be wrong about some things, but this is the way iiiiiii understand ESPN Fantasy Hockey, and i'm just a girl who has literally never participated in fantasy sports before <3
I am a uni student, soooo we don’t have summer breaks.I live in Australia, where summer breaks do not exist anyway.IIIIIII also live in the southern hemisphere, where it is currently… winter. It’s nine degrees Celsius outside and midnight as I am writing this.
So. Um. Good, I guess? I’m on holidays for over a month after next week, so I’m hoping to get a lot of writing done. I’m also thinking of taking advantage of the month-long netflix free trial so I can binge some short series I want to watch. I think it’ll be good. Means I’ll have made it through a whole semester at uni and hopefully passed everything, which last year I didn’t know if I was going to be able to do.
Gotta get on with chapter ten as well, don’t I? More cats, more fluff before I bring the angst back.
okkkk so i was tagged by @whenjikookhappens and @idunknowhyimhere for one version, and @sashagirl1116 for another version...right?? maybe more but honestly for some of ‘em, i’m super late to getting to this OTL forgive me, but i’m combining them since they’re similar and i’m lazy :3
1ST RULE: Tag 9 people you want to get to know better (I think I might break this rule, because I don’t have 9 people askhakjss)
2ND RULE: Fill in the categories
Appearance: i have shoulder-length curly ass hair that’s dark brown (so dark to the point where it just looks black at this point-). i am 5′5″ i believe (approx. 167cm according to google) and have brown eyes. i’m always wearing black because i live that #Emo lifestyle....jkjk, no but i always wear either sweaters or hoodies/overthrows and pants- it’s a rare occasion if you see me in a dress, skirt, or shorts but it can happen if i’m feeling up to it.
Personality: i’m super quiet and reserved if i don’t know people (i try not to be online, but am still awkward as all hell) but i’m super lame when you get to know me. like, very lame. so lame i’m surprised if you don’t leave. that lame. i like to make lame jokes and puns a lot, but sometimes hold myself back because even i embarrass myself sometimes (all the time). i like to tease the people i feel close to, so outsiders may think i’m just a bitch, but i swear i’m not...or at least i try not to be *hides* ummmM i’m also sarcastic af if i know you well (or feel that comfortable) and i speak fluent meme. i’m very emotion-based in my actions, so don’t mess with those i love unless you’re looking to catch these hands!! :)
Ability: iiiiiii don’t have any “SUPER WOW AMAZING” abilities lol, but i draw and write aaaaand can play piano by ear *shrug* i dunno what my IQ is but apparently i pick things up quickly and am good at teaching myself stuff from either just experimenting or using...my...brain... so people say that’s smart, no idea. (i don’t believe them but sure, why not-) i dunno if this would count as an ability, probably a negative one, but i’m a toTAL WORD DUMPSTER. like, you’ll see in this because i can just type and type and talk and talk and saljsalsja i also ramble a lot along with this, so that’s also great. but yeah i shall stop myself now.
Hobbies: as mentioned above, writing and drawing are my main hobbies! also just listening to music (or musicals) in my cocoon (blanket) lol i don’t do much because duh, i’m lame.
Experiences: hmm this’ll be more like injury stories because those are fun. ok story uno: i was born with a hole in my heart!! :D i was apparently super close to dying because duh, nothing was functioning right and had to get my first surgery ever while only a couple seconds old. mmm there was also this one time where i was riding my scooter in my family’s garage on easter (i was like 6 or 8) and i bumped into the grill which had rose clippers on it. the rose clippers fell and sliced my foot open from heel to toe. i didn’t even notice tho and kept riding until my aunt was like saying how i’m trailing blood somehow and looked at my foot and screamed...then i started crying like a baby (ofc) and got 8 stitched and a cast. i didn’t understand why they wouldn’t let me walk tho and made it worse becAUSE I WAS A STUPID ASS KID. uhh another time i was riding my bike on the road and i was standing and riding (like this) and my foot slipped so i fell right on the road. my face hit the concrete and my arm was twisted and underneath the bike. me being the stupid 8-11 year old i was froze and started to cry because there was a car driving towards me and i thought they’d run me over. the car stopped, duh, but i was still convinced i’d get hit and i couldn’t frickin move because i was weak, so my mom had to come and get me after i was screaming bloody murder for her nonstop. i’m so embarrassed by that one because i was so dramatic ugh...and iN PUBLIC TOO ASKHSLJSA i’m the clumsiest person ever (namjoon level, bro) so injuries (either minor, major, or just plain stupid) happen a lot.
My Life: well i go to a charter school, which is basically home school except i have to go onto “campus” (we call it campus, it’s a regular school building) twice a week. but majority of everything is completed online. mmmm right now i’m trying not to fail math as i continue my hate for biology ^_^ i live with my parents, grandparents, and younger siblings. i wanna be some sort of artist or writer, but i’m just not sure yet soooo yeah.
Relationships: i’ve never been in any sort of serious relationship. i once dated this guy online but i was, like, 12 so i don’t really count it, nor mention it (until now pfft). bUT my tumblr wifey is none other than @ithefanfictionwriter (aren’t i just the luckiest person alive to have them?? *sighs fondly*)
Random Stuff: if i get into the right mindset i like to bake. like, a lot. i always have these random bursts of creativity and/or motivation where i just wanna try shit .. like right at that moment, no waiting because i’ll most likely not wanna do it later. so now. right now. i’m also impatient af if you couldn’t tell. hmmm most of the time, i don’t like watching movies or anything like that because i have such a short attention span and will most likely get bored within a couple minutes. i’m in other fandoms that aren’t relating to kpop- i.e., talk to me about hamilton, heathers (both the movie & musical), deh, camp camp, eddsworld, rick and morty, etc. etc. and i’ll love you forever!!!!! i used to be into hetalia but only when i was younger so majority of it’s been pushed outta my mind, hence why i never mention because i don’t want people to think i’m hARDCOre ‘cause i’m honestly not.
das it!! wow, look at all those words. i’m sorry if you read through it all. this is why all my essays turn out to be 2000 words over the word limit majority of the time and- shit i’m doing it again. I’LL SHUT UP AND TAG PEOPLE: @futuristicgardenerbasement , @jhopesun , @chimchimswifey95 (i know you lol but no one else does so get typing dorky), @thewordbedlookslikeabed , @neckpillows , @chockenscritch and that’s all because i dunno who else to tag (oops).
Rules: Answer these 85 statements and tag 20 people
tagged by @madi-starlight thanks!! i’m procrastinating and this was a v nice distraction
i’m gonna tag @zoetekohana @zaatanna @puddingmcmuffin @mininjas @fireonallwires @distopianpixie + anyone else who wants to, sry i’m shit at tagging people in these things
the last
01. drink: water
02. phone call: to a local restaurant for food delivery bc i was too lazy to cook
03. text message: one of my friends is obsessed w/ lisa frank so i sent her the link to the lf tarot cards
04. song you listened to: "dinosaur” - akmu
05. time you cried: last week probably. my best friend and i currently aren’t talking and i’ve been taking it pretty hard lately.
06. dated someone twice: yup
07. kissed someone and regretted it: not really
08. been cheated on: yuuuuup
09. lost someone special: my childhood dog, balki. i’ve lost all my grandparents, but none of those hit me anywhere near as hard as my dog, honestly.
10. been depressed: i mean i go through phases where i’m sad? but i think to say i was depressed would be embellishing it.
11. gotten drunk and thrown up: almost every time tbh. unless i’m home drinking alone, then i know when i’ve hit my limit. but if i’m out with friends i usually don’t realize i’m ~gone until like....... i’m way fuckin gone
3 favourite colours
12. turquoise!!
13. green
14. b l a c k
in the last year have you
15. made new friends: i don’t rly think so
16. fallen out of love: never been in love!
17. laughed until you cried: oh yeah
18. found out someone was talking about you: no! but i wouldn’t be surprised if my coworkers do lmao
19. met someone who changed you: nnnnnno
20. found out who your friends are: regrettably
21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: yup!
General:
22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: the vast majority of them? i don’t use fb anymore but i honestly don’t think i added anyone on there i hadn’t met. OH there’s a few tumblr friends on there, but i think only three maybe that i haven’t actually met.
23. do you have any pets: yep! a dog, khloe.
24. do you want to change your name: i used to?? i mean. i’m not in love with my name. heather is kinda ..... lame tbh. but i mostly go by nicknames so it doesn’t bother me too much
25. what did you do for your last birthday: i don’t think i did anything, actually.
26. what time did you wake up: noon. ooops. but i didn’t fall asleep until almost 5am soooo
27. what were you doing at midnight last night: probably working out. that’s usually the time of night i finally force myself to lmao
28. name something you can’t wait for: young justice!!!!! getting my hair/cut dyed in a couple days! i ordered new glasses and i’m excited for those to come in!!
29. when was the last time you saw your mom: a year and a half ago
31. what are you listening to right now: the crickets chirp
32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: i work in a retail pharmacy so yaaaaa probably on a daily basis, there’s a zillion ppl named tom/thomas
33. something that is getting on your nerves: blogs w/ impossible to find back buttons!! i’m trying to scroll through your blog like pls don’t make me work for it
34. most visited website: tumblr, youtube, ulta
35. hair color: blonde
36. long or short hair: medium?? it’s a couple inches past my collarbone
37. do you have a crush on someone: vaaaaguely. there’s a dude i semi-work with and he’s just so gosh darn nice?? he’s coming back to work with us for a few days and its Glaringly Fucking Obvious to my coworkers i like him so when head boss dude told me he was coming back he announced it in front of allllll my coworkers so they could laugh at how badly i blushed. i hate that i’m fucking obvious!!! but at least he doesn’t know lmao
38. what do you like about yourself: i like to think i’m pretty funny. also my hair. eyes. booty. not to be totally self-involved but tbh i really love my toosh.
39. piercings: two in each ear and a nose ring!
40. blood type: i probably bleed kpop at this point
41. nickname: benny, peetah, pikachu, little bit
42. relationship status: single, thank fuck. i like my freedom too much.
43. zodiac: libra.
44. pronouns: she/her
45. favourite tv show: AVATAR: THE LAST DAMN AIRBENDER, young justice, voltron (i hate putting voltron next to those two though bc no offense but like....... voltron could never ever compare to how glorious a:tla/yj are)
46. tattoos: none! i’m debating getting one before my bday in october though
47. right or left handed: right
48. surgery: i had my gall bladder removed when i was 15
50. sport: i was a goalie in soccer for years!
51. vacation: like dream vacation?? australia. california. vegas. seoul.
52. pair of trainers: apparently trainers = tennis shoes????? idek these things. i have a white pair of keds that i wear almost daily bc work
MORE GENERAL
53. eating: the last thing i ate was a couple apple slices?? idk what this is asking
54. drinking: waaaater
55. I’m about to: try to get some sleep
56. waiting for: sleepiness to hit me tbh
57. want: money. to kiss a pretty girl. to have my own house.
58. get married: maybe? i honestly can’t imagine myself caring about someone enough to wanna marry them though. and if i ever did no wedding pls thanks.
59. career: pharmacy technician!
WHICH IS BETTER:
60. hugs or kisses: hugs
61. lips or eyes: lips
62. shorter or taller: TALLER tho it aint hard bc im way too short
63. older or younger: i guess older?
64. nice arms or nice stomach: arms
65. hookup or relationship: iiiiiii guess relationship?
66. troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker duh
HAVE YOU EVER:
67. kissed a stranger: i don’t think so
68. drank hard liquor: yaaaa
69. lost glasses/contact lenses: nope
70. turned someone down: yupyup
71. sex on the first date: lmao yes
73. had your heart broken: i’m currently mourning the loss of question 72 so yes?? but truthfully yeah. i wouldn’t say my heart was broken as that’s melodramatic af. but there was a dude i could’ve really seen myself falling for and it didn’t pan out and that was probably the saddest i’ve ever been over anyone.
74. been arrested: nope. but i have been pulled over by the cops five times in one night. four?? maybe it was four times idk
75. cried when someone died: my dog, yeah.
76. fallen for a friend: i’ve had crushes but def never fallen.
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
77. yourself: sometimes
78. miracles: not really
79. love at first sight: lust, yeah. love, nope.
80. santa claus: nope
81. kiss on the first date: i actually used to be anti-anything on the first date, but that’s mostly bc it takes me a long time to warm up to people and feel comfortable enough around them to do anything. but the last girl i dated i did literally everything with on the first date so ?????? guess that shits out the door
82. angels: not so much
OTHER:
84. eye colour: mine?? blue. kind of a greyish blue.
85. favourite movie: the first thing that came to mind was ‘forgetting sarah marshall’ tbh
Haha, I’m hilarious. This is just a fic about Bendy prank calling people. It was really fun to write.
Did you know that prink is an actual word? Prink: v. to spend time making minor adjustments to one's appearance; primp. Neat, huh?
“Good morning! this is Sam’s Deli with the best dang grilled cheese sandwiches on this side of the Mississippi. How can I help you?”
“Well Ma’am, I simply have one urgent question for you: Is your refridgerator running?”
“Oh! Why, I do believe it is.”
“Well you better go catch it!” click.
“Lawrence Residence.”
“Is a gal named ‘Jenny,’ at home?”
“Sir, no one by the name of ‘Jenny’ resides in this house.”
“...She told you to say that didn't she. DIDN’T SHE?!”
“Sir, I promise no one here is named-”
“OH, well this is just rich. A gal leaves a guy standing outside the theater for FIVE HOURS and pretends she ain’t home. Ain't this just swell.”
“Sir, I apologize for the misunderstanding and give you my deepest condolences for being stood up.”
“I was not stood up!”
“But this ‘Jenny’-”
“I was abandoned! Cheated!”
“Does not live here-”
“Scorned! Scoundreled! Hooly-hopkined!”
“I'm going to hang up now.”
“Flabber-gailed! Cathoodled! Rhapfooted!” click.
“Hullo?”
“Good evening sir! Have you ever heard of the Yodel Meter?”
“Bendy is that you?”
“Ah, yes the Yodel Meter, probably the most innovative invention of our time. What better way is there to measure the power of your yodel? There's none! Order now and receive five hundred Yodel Meters for only $700! Reach your full yodeling potential with the Yodel Meter today!”
“Bendy, you tried to selling me a Yodel Meter last week.”
“Oh no! We’re breaking up! How dreadful. See ya later Boris!”
“Wait just a gosh darn-” click.
“Who iiiiiiis it?”
“Bendy if you don't stop botherin’ folks this second-”
“Me!? Bother people!? Boris, I am appalled you would think so low of me. I would never!”
“Yesterday you put a bucket of ink over Mr. Malvin’s door.”
“He deserved it!”
“And then you put a fake spider in Mrs. Lory’s shoe.”
“She gave me a dirty look when I walked in front of her house!”
“You ran across her flower bed carrying a bucket of ink, spilling it everywhere while singing, ‘Sweet Violets.’”
“That was fun.”
“You have to stop!”
“Hmmmmmmmmm… Nah. Oh! And Boris?”
“What?”
“There should be around five hundred or so Yodel Meters arriving at the house today. I won't be there so if you could cover the bill that’d be just swell.”
“WHAT?!”
“Thanks for being such a pal!”
“No wait! Don't hang-” click.
“...Hello?”
“Hello Miss! May I interest you in the new and marvelous invention-”
“Kenneth is that you?”
“Uh...no, I'm just-”
“Kenneth you need to stop calling me! We’re over, done, no more! You cheated on me for the last time! If you like those other girls so much, go date them!”
“Wait...girls? How many girls?”
“...Eight.”
“Pffft-HAhahaha. And you stayed with that loser?”
“...Is this really not Kenneth?”
“Well DUH. But Miss, heheh, you must be really thick in the head if you’ll stay with a guy after he cheated on you with eight different girls.”
“I’m not with him anymore! We broke up!”
“Uh-huh. Well, it sounds like the next time he comes to your door with a bouquet of roses and eyes full of crocodile tears that won’t be true anymore.”
“I mean… If he gives me roses.”
“HA! Listen honey, I’m gonna give you some advice. Next time this Kendal-”
“Kenneth.”
“Ya, sure, whatever. Next time he comes over I want you to take one look at those roses, look him straight in the eyes, and tell him where he can stick them.”
“Where?”
“In the trash of course! Where he belongs. Then you slam the door in his face and go find yourself a better man. No man who’ll cheat eight times is worth his ink.”
“Yeah...yeah you’re right! I’m not gonna let him back in my life! Roses or no he’s not worth it! His treacherous, sinister...sad...deep...beautiful blue eyes….WILL HOLD NO MORE POWER OVER ME!! I’m done forever! No more Kenneth!”
“Mhm-hm. Sounds great. I’m soooo proud of you. Oh, and by the way, is your refridgerator running?”
“...Yes?”
“Then you’d better go catch it!” click.
Nerd time: So, I actually calculated how much i think 500 yodel meters would cost (and yes, they were really a thing in the 1920s/30s). I couldn’t find an exact cost on google :( but on amazon a metranome/instrument tuner all in one costed $20 so I calculated that if 1$ back then was equivalent to $140 now, then $20 of now money would cost $1.4 back then. Then I multiplied it by 500 and voila! That’s how I estimated it would cost $700 dollars for 500 yodel meters. To put that into perspective, the average cost of a brand new car was $640 back then. Yup. I’m sorry-not-sorry I’m a nerd :P
