#spideypool headcanons

[spinechxlls]

Peter: last time I was, you know, on top during a hook up I broke his pelvis

Wade: ...what

Peter: i know, I feel really bad...

Wade: no that's the hottest thing I have ever heard

[hammers-eatingme]

I know what happens when Deadpool lives while Spiderman dies, I know. I know he ends up dying as well eventually, I know he grieves, but in the meantime?

Every Deadpool has a Spider-Man, yes? So when he does pass, Wade gets a new spiderman. His hair isn't brown and coily, it's straight and blonde. He's not snarky, but he's compassionate. He doesn't snort when he laughs, his face doesn't go red with laughter. He doesn't accidentally break mugs. He doesn't start singing musicals, swinging from rooftops. He's not Peter. But he's spiderman.

Then he passes. Maybe he meets a new Spidey. Maybe his name isn't Peter, but it's Harold. They're different, yes, but they both sound a bit geeky. He's not a baby-boy, but maybe he could be a different nickname. He doesn't have a dimple in his left cheek when he smirks, he doesn't randomly do backflips, he doesn't like pickles, he doesn't like tacos, he likes pizza. He's not Peter.

He passes as well. Now he meets someone exactly like Peter. His hair is brown and coily, he complains about it, he likes pineapple on pizza, he pours milk first when making cereal, he drinks exactly four cups of coffee a day, etc. But something's off. He's not his Peter, he's just Peter.

Wade's doomed to search for Peter in every single Spider-Man. He's doomed to look for his soul. He has photos of Peter that he Cherishes. They're fading, but he just gets a new one. He has Peter's clothes, worn in, doesn't smell like him anymore, now it just smells like Wade. He has that friendship necklace he bought for them, the other half still around Peter's neck. He visits his grave, even though it's crumbling and taken over by moss.

No one is Peter, and Wade will forevermore be doomed to yearn for him, to search for him in everyone he sees. When he finally does die, maybe the earth implodes, or maybe it was a nuclear blast, he sighs one last time, relief seeping from every pore on him. "See you soon, Baby-boy," he mumbles. The name, even though he's gone decades without saying it, slips off his tongue. It's familiar. A chuckle dies on his tongue as a warmth envelopes him. Maybe it's death, but it feels like Peter. It finally feels like his Peter.

[icarusredwings]

GUYS: Peter traces the spotches of skin and thinks of it like cloud watching, guessing what each shape looks like. Wade draws constellations on Peters back with his freckles.

Neither of them know about this.

[spiderculechronicals]

Wade and Peter's Spider-man/Deadpool banter over the course of their budding relationship turns from snarking at each other to yes-anding each other against the opponent, to flirtatious gassing each other up, and then back to vicious antagonism but it's over the top because they're just pretending to fight while actually working more in sync than ever to efficiently take down the threat, then make out with masks pushed up partway in front of the webbed-up bad guys until right before the cops get there and then bolt off home giggling.

[ghosttalksalot]

i think wade, once he's eventually comfortable enough, is a big-time cuddler.

he wakes up as soon as peter is no longer within his grasp, not in his arms, or close enough to touch, because his spider is such an important presence, even though peter just had to slip away to use the bathroom.

he sleeps best holding peter tight to his chest, knowing that he's there with him, safe and comfortable in wade's arms.

anytime they watch a movie or anything, doesn't matter how they start, they always end up pressed tightly against each other, as if wade's holding on for dear life.

peter often chuckles and reminds wade that hes not going anywhere, and wade squeezes him gently and whispers back that he's just making sure.

really, it's just that wade has never gotten used to, and will never get used to, the fact that he has such an incredible person that loves him so much, and he wants to feel it as much as possible, in the form of cuddles, all the time.

when they go to restaurants, wade likes it best when they can sit next to each other, sides pressed against each other and one arm around peter. when they sit across from each other, he always links one leg with peter's, and usually holds his hand over the table as well.

when they walk together, wade likes to have an arm around peter's shoulders.

after patrol, his favorite part is the warm and sleepy embrace, relieved to be safe in each other's arms.

wade is even the type to snake his arms around peter's midsection while the latter tries to cook, nuzzling his face into his spider's shoulder.

after a hard night, wade will just want a long, tight hug, to feel peter's presence entirely. he might even want to be the one held that night, just as tightly as he holds peter, to feel just as safe and loved.

peter doesn't take much time to get used to it, and learn that the happiest wade is a held wade, and he is more than content to deliver.

[thegayghost26]

Peter, about to be murdered: man i sure hope this is gonna be on buzzfeed unsolved

Murderer: *takes off mask to reveal shane madej* it will

Peter: Ohmygosh, mr madej sir !!!

-

Deadpool: I don’t see why i can’t be both the love interest and the antagonist.

-

Tobey: I would always think to myself “How could another person kill someone?”

Tobey: And then I met Deadpool and i was like “Oh okay.”

[whyamialiverightnow]

10 SpideyPool Headcanons

Okay, so, first post about my favorite Peter Parker ship. Here I go.

I believe… that Wade is absolutely terrified of Aunt May.

I believe… that Peter will never give up trying to reform Wade.

I believe… that every time Wade “dies”, Peter loses his mind and absolutely wrecks whoever did it.

I believe… that Peter kisses every one of Wade’s scars after sex.

I believe… that Wade has killed someone because they looked at Peter for too long.

I believe… that Wade and Peter argue all the time, but they make sure to never let it get above raised voices.

I believe… that Wade basically trips over his own feet to get Peter’s attention.

I believe… that Wade sometimes spends hours just staring at Peter’s face while he sleeps.

I believe… that Peter will always calmly wash Wade’s suit after a particularly bloody battle.

I believe… that these two perfect superhumans are absolutely and beautifully in love.

[brunisimoooo]

SPIDEYPOOL HEADCANON, what would deadpool do after the events of SMNWH

OMG OKAY SO IDK WHICH SPIDERMAN IS WITH DEADPOOL BUT I THINK ITS ANDREW BUT ANYWAYS THIS IS AFTER THE EVENTS OF SNWH AND HE GETS BACK OR WHATEVER HAPPENS IN THE MOVIE AND DEADPOOL IS LIKE “BRO WTF HAPPENED WHERE DID U GO??“ AND SO ON

Ah, I hadn't thought about that, I like it SO MUCH that I just did a weird and long thing. Hope you like it.

- First things first. They were together before the multiverse wooosh portals disaster happened, on patrol around the neighborhood

- Peter was stressed and Deadpool really wanted to make him rest. Maybe not a free night but a calmer one

- Even the neighborhood was calm enough with just a few incidents. Like it really tried to give the friendly neighbor a free night

- So, Wade insisted on buying Peter's dinner. Even so, he offers him a dinner in a fancy restaurant

- But Peter said no, as he wanted to be on the watch for problems

- So instead, Wade bought burgers and fries to enjoy on the rooftop of an old building

- Then, Peter felt his spider-sense tingling in an alley, he didn't let Wade go with him

- And he just vanished

- Wade didn't see any of this, so he thought Peter went chasing someone

- He was sure he was gonna came back, after all, they were having a non-official date

- But then, the minutes transformed into hours and he was getting worried, so he started to search for Peter

- And then, all of the sudden, Peter came back. Looking like a mess, excited and somehow, happy

"Where the fuck did you go?" was the first thing Deadpool said to him. He even went to Peter's apartment

"I'm sorry, but man, I'm gonna tell you something, something really really weird. You will not believe me at first but I swear it's true"

"Just...why didn't you say anything?" Deadpool whispered. He was happy to see him as a joyful puppy but at the same time, he wasn't good with the fact that he just disappeared. That easy. It was scary.

"I couldn't! I swear!" Wade considered Peter's words and he finally noticed how down his friend looked "I'm fine, really. If another magical portal appears in front of me I'll bring you with me, okay?"

"Now you're fucking with me" both men sat down at the emergency stairs of an old apartment building. Peter laughed and take off his mask.

"I promise I'm not, just listen to me" then, Peter told him everything.

"Two other Peter's...whew, they were hot like you?" Wade pinched Peter's cheek, while he moaned in annoyance

"After everything, I told you, that's what you ask?" he stifled a laugh, unsure of the meaning of that heat in his cheeks. He had said to the other version of himself, Peter 2, that he wanted a normal dating life. At that moment, he thought about the cute relationship between the younger one and his girlfriend, and inevitably, he started to think about Gwen and the possibility of being with some new girl but maybe what he had in return was something different.

Something he didn't want to accept as something more than a "bromance" type of friendship.

"We are handsome, yes. But one is only a kid and the other one is probably married, I don't know" then he realized the danger he had been in and how worried was Wade.

"I...I'm sorry for disappearing like that. I mean it"

"Nevermind. Just set me up with the married one and we're good"

"I hope there are others of you. But nicer and less gross" Peter escaped from his arms while Wade groaned at that action.

"I'm joking, bubble-butt. You know I only have eyes for you"

Finger guns.

"You are really cringe" but Peter couldn't hide the red from his cheeks.

"Peter...I mean it" and before he could even react to that. Wade offered him another burger.