So, my friend had a theory.
If you’ve seen John’s journal, then you know about the ghosts of two gay nuns Dean killed on a hunt for his 17th birthday, and how John said that they could only be reunited in death.
What if that message stuck with Dean for all of his life? Why didn’t he want Sam to call the ambulance for him in 15x20?
BECAUSE HE WANTED TO SEE CAS AGAIN.
(p.s for context, John’s journal got published. there was an entry where he documented Dean’s 17th birthday hunt, where he killed the ghosts two nuns that were in love. He also said that they “could only be reunited in death”.)
He KNEW Cas was dead. HE COULD HAVE DIED NOT BECAUSE IT WAS HIS TIME, BUT BECAUSE HE THOUGHT THAT THE ONLY WAY HE COULD SEE CAS AGAIN WAS IN DEATH.
fucking crazy














