#sqjoe

[soccerstarberry]

[PM] I don't know if I love or hate that you took eating me alive literally. But at least I know I'm too meaty to eat. Well, I mean we're just friends right now. She told me she doesn't really date, but I think it's more that no one's really asked her or wanted to. Ha, thanks Rachel. Ya know if there's any guy or gal that catches your eye I'm totally here for you to help if I can.

I’d personally prefer it if you found it endearing, as no one truly likes to be hated, regardless of whether or not they express a lack of caring of what their peers think of them. Just friends is sometimes an excellent place for a blossoming relationship to begin, Joseph! But if she’s adamant about dating, then it’s really for the best that you respect her wishes. If she seems like she’s saying that as a precaution or to explain why she’s unversed in the ways of dating, however, then that might be her way of letting you know that she’s uncertain of how to proceed from this point. While I appreciate the sentiment, I’m not certain that there’s anyone who I’m compatible with at this point in time. Anyone who I find interesting to talk to isn’t quite on my level socially, or else they’re not as goal oriented as I am, and anyone who is of the appropriate popularity level to date McKinley’s top female athlete is generally too busy with their own pursuits to have much time for dating, either.

[soccerstarberry]

[PM] So you think that you'll become, what, captain of the Glee Club? Is that a thing? But, I see you got in along with a few others I didn't even know could sing. So, congrats! Not everything that shines is gold, as the saying goes. Well, um, maybe not. There are a few gross scenes. Hm. What about Groundhog Day? That's kinda romantic-cute.

[PM] I would most certainly think so! Every team needs a captain, whether it’s academic, arts, or athletic based. And as you know, I’m really quite exceptional, and tend to work harder than most of my peers, so I see no reason why I shouldn’t be an excellent candidate. I’ve already proven that I’m also well-versed in how to lead a team to victory, even if soccer and singing are quite different tasks. You wouldn’t be the first person this week to recommend something a bit gross to me; in fact, Dani’s been requesting that I view a lesbian prison show ripe with nudity and violence so that I can discuss it with her! Isn’t that a movie about someone living the same day over and over again? It’s a cultural classic and I’ve at least heard of it, even if I’ve never viewed it for myself. Although that particular holiday just passed, I guess there’s no real right or wrong time to view a movie.

[soccerstarberry]

[PM] Well, I mean I've learned a lot already, but I don't wanna f this up, ya know? I mean I don't think she gives a lot of people the chance to really get to know her and I'm one of the lucky few and I kinda don't want that to go away. We hung out a few weeks ago, but that's kinda been it. But, um.. no judgement right? I'm not going to tell you who she is and you're going to eat me alive or anything, are you? It's um well it's Quinn.

[PM] I couldn’t eat you alive even if I wanted to, Joseph. I’m significantly smaller than you and there’s no way I could consume that much in one sitting; you’d have died from your injuries well before I could finish eating you. But being a cannibal doesn’t really mesh well with my vegan lifestyle, so I assure you that you’re safe. I’m quite happy for you and Miss Fabray if things seem as though they’re going to work out for you -- if that’s what you want then what position am I in to judge? Of course I don’t particularly care for her as a person but she’s not the worst person in McKinley High School, and what you do with your social life is your prerogative. However, for your benefit I’ve followed up on her post about a Salem Witch Trials movie that she disliked to ensure that you never attempt to watch said movie with her, even if I don’t particularly care about the subject myself.

[soccerstarberry]

[PM] What kind of 'edge' are you going for? Because I'm not sure if Glee Club can get you there, but to each their own and all that. And I wasn't considering it, but as always I'll come and support you. Breaking Bad isn't really my thing either, but I try to give everything a shot. I'll let you know if it's worth the awards. Never mind, Rachel. Avatar on Ice just sounds like a disaster. How long was it? Off the top of my head The Incredible Burt Wonderstone.

[PM] I need more clubs where I can command some sort of leadership role, the way that Santana has Model UN and is the leader of NHS. Glee club makes me a triple threat -- it proves that I’m academic, athletic, and also artistic. That’s a shame, as you’re certainly talented enough to provide background vocals. Really? I’m actually glad to hear that; it seems a bit grotesque but the general public seems to shower it with praise anyway. It was approximately two hours in length, so at least it abridged the plot of the movie a bit. And I can’t say I’ve ever heard of it, but when I have the free time I’ll consider watching, assuming you think it would be up to my standards.

[soccerstarberry]

[PM] Speaking of secrets.. you remember a long time ago, like a month ago, when you said you'd be happy to investigate my uh I guess you can say crush? Well, you're a girl, right? I mean you know what girls like, yeah? Would you be interested in helping me figure out what a particular girl likes and how to not come off like a complete dummy? Just, ya know, this stays between us of course.

[PM] Other females might choose to disagree with that statement, but I’d like to think that I have a sound understanding of people of my own gender, yes. I realized that secrecy was implied in whatever you were asking, given that you prefaced it with ‘speaking of secrets’, but thank you for clarifying. If you’re interested in this girl, I’m sure that you’ll start to learn what she likes on your own; boys tend to remember even the littlest of details that they share, but I’d be happy to gather additional information for you. Of course, in order to do that, I’d have to actually know the identity of this mysterious girl, but I’m sure you’re about to share that with me, right?

[soccerstarberry]

[PM] Really? Dang, I thought I was special. Define 'legal.' Are we talking about Breaking Bad because I've never seen Breaking Bad. Isn't that about cocaine though? I don't dabble with the white stuff, my friend. It's short for Mom Dukes. Has no one heard of that before? Well, I kinda enjoy annoying her and if I threw out compliments there goes my fun. Avatar? On ice? Um. Anyway. Yeah I know, but I thought I would somehow uncover your secret obsession of romcoms.

[PM] Perhaps you are. Most friends are a bit easier to keep tabs on, since we can spend time together at school without it being considered social suicide. Speaking of social suicide, have you considered auditioning for the glee club? I’ve decided to try out regardless of the impact it might have on my reputation with my peers; I feel that I need an edge if I want to remain among the most desirable students this school has to offer, but with Santana getting lacrosse captain, I’m afraid that she might have passed me. I haven’t actually watched it either, I was just told that it was about a man making drugs for a living. But yes, Breaking Bad’s the one I meant. I feel I should watch it since it’s so critically acclaimed, but at the same time it’s so utterly not my type of thing that I can’t see how I’d possibly enjoy it. Mom Dukes? I can’t say I get the reference. That seems like a strange dynamic but whatever makes you both happy, I suppose. It was a strange experience; you’re allowed to comment on it more if you wish. Sadly, I only have a select few romantic comedies that truly strike my fancy, and I don’t make it a habit to go and see many of them. Do you have a favorite? Perhaps I’ll give it a try if you do.

[soccerstarberry]

[PM] Wow, thanks. I didn't think you took that much notice in me. What's wrong with doing what I do for a living? I mean, it's not something I want to do forever, but it's a job (sorta). Nope, The Duke is my mom. Righteous! My taste buds are ready! Mercy's pretty cool, yeah, don't tell her I said that though. What do you mean? Sci-fi is a whole other kind of planet that needs to be explored, my friend. Don't tell me you're a romcom kind of girl.

[PM] Contrary to popular belief, I take notice of all my friends. Just because I care about myself the most doesn’t mean I don’t care about other people. For starters, it’s not exactly legal, is it? I don’t think you should be providing for your family with a source of funding that could potentially land you in jail at any minute. Didn’t they create an entire television show about what an unstable life that is? Your mom? That seems counterintuitive, but if it makes you happy to call her that, then carry on. I won’t tell her, although I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t want her to know. Generally people appreciate compliments, you know. My exposure to sci-fi is mostly limited to my daddies insisting on taking me to Avatar on Ice when it came through Ohio, and me being puzzled by why everyone had to be blue to make the plot interesting. While I’m not entirely averse to romantic comedies, you know very well that my primary genre of movies are either sports-related or musicals.

[soccerstarberry]

[PM] So they basically ate a penis. If you /really/ wanna think about it. You think I'll make a suitable dad? Thanks! But, don't worry I'm not tryin' to get a girl knocked up right now. The Duke would kill me and I kinda like my life. Awe man you've gotta let me try that, it sounds pretty good. And you called /me/ busy. You and Mercy are friends, huh? And sorta? Frida's just good company. And it was some old b&w movies, frickin' sci-fi classics! We should watch some sometime.

[PM] I’d prefer not to think about it that way, if it’s all the same to you. I don’t have male genitalia for myself, of course, but I can only imagine that that would be an extremely painful experience for someone who does. You have a calm demeanor, you can get excited about things when the situation calls for it, and despite your excessive marijuana usage you seem to have good values. I think if you were to start a family you’d be a decent patriarch, although of course you’d need to find a way to secure finances (in a respectable manner) before that time. The Duke? Is that what you refer to your father as? And I’d be more than happy to share the recipe with you, and even make the first batch as an example! Things always taste nicer when someone else makes them for you, I’ve found, even if I worry sometimes that daddies are going to include ingredients that I wouldn’t approve of. Yes, but I’m always busy, everyone know that. If I’m not busy with other people I keep myself busy with training. We are! I’ve found that she’s a really great companion; I’ve grown especially fond of her during the past few months. I enjoy talking to Frida as well; she seems to have her priorities in order. Sci-fi? I suppose I’m not surprised that Quinn enjoys that sort of thing.