#st upid

[rhp162]

[erikag59]

[liz-and-the-blue-bird]

if i stay up any longer i’m going to hurt myself good freaking night 

[gigamuffin]

I ju st nee d to ch ill

[deathlit]

                                                                            " ------ shit! " 

                      there's a clattering of dishes & housewares from the kitchen as octavia SLAMS the oven shut just at the same time little bellamy t o p p l e s over a canister of utensils onto the counter. the sound of the door opening & closing caused the curse to fly out of her mouth. bellamy looks at her with wide azure eyes, looking like he's either on the verge of laughing or calling it out. 'potty mouths' are actually quite abundant in their household. she's got flour up to her elbows & smeared across her cheek -- courtesy of the EXUBERANT boy sitting on the counter next to her. her eyes flick up just in time to see kai turn the corner, though she could have waited just two more seconds because the instant he's in sight bellamy bursts out. " daddy! " with a clap of his batter-sticky hands while octavia looks as though she's just been caught doing something BAD. 

                      in a way, she wasn't necessarily convinced that they weren't --- kai has never shown any inclination that he DESIRES or appreciates things of this sort. or at least, not in the way normal people usually do, with warm gratitude. more or less, she had left this sort of decision up to their child's discretion. how does one celebrate the birthday of a father who simply may not c a r e? toddlers, however, don't think like that. toddlers don't think with COMPLEXITY. in short, bellamy felt his father needed cake. cake was important on birthdays. so began the interesting experience of baking a cake from scratch with a two-year-old. for octavia's part, she just wanted some kind of way to show her appreciation. it hasn't been easy but TWO YEARS is so much longer than she could have imagined --- two years of him being here, of helping in the ways that he can, for being the figure in bellamy's life that she never had. 

                     " s u r p r i s e! " she announces with a bit of uncertainty as bellamy writhes impatiently as she rubs his hands clean with a towel, eager to go & greet kai properly. she kisses the top of his head when gathering him up, quickly bringing him over before he can SPRING OUT of her arms in his haste. in spite of moments of coldness, spans of time when neither of his parents could agree on a single thing ( & interrupting a FIGHT between them more than o n c e ) & some chaos & instability, the little boy was a CONSTANT. it was clear he loved them. that simplicity allows for octavia to reflect on that, on their strange lives & be pleasantly surprised. today of all days, she's throwing up a WHITE FLAG. today she's happy that they feel like a family. so she lets out a genuine smile as bellamy outstretches his hands to grab at kai's shirt. she even goes so far as to stretch up on her own tiptoes & press her lips gently to his cheek as she passes their son over. 

                                                                       " happy birthday. "

[billycraplan]

i miss megan

[swindlt]

[vilikasper]

i really just want to set myself on fire