#stabs rambles

[stabthroughme]

Ilya can't go back to visit his mother's grave, but sometimes higher ups from the Treasury Board in Canada do go on diplomatic missions.

David who's assigned to go on a trip to Russia after Hollanov's been outed, because he's been picking up Russian and it would be a good temperature read on the Russian counterparts.

David who visits Irina's grave and spends time cleaning it up, lights a candle and sits until long after it's burned out.

David who tells Irina about Shane as a child, who tells her about all the ways Shane and Ilya fit together, who tells her about the puzzle nights and the cookies and cream ice cream and the blanket they keep specifically for Ilya on their couch.

David who reassures Irina that he helped Ilya with his cuff links on his wedding day, tells her not to worry about her boy.

David who tells Irina that her son is so loved and cherished.

David who plants a little maple tree as a "sign of friendship" in a park across from the cemetery Irina is buried in. He got to pick the place, and he made sure she would be able to see it.

Edit may 3: Hey if you're here from threads :) Love getting jump-scared with my own tumblr post getting screenshotted (this is fine i promise, they credited me properly) but jfc. Right in front of my salad???

Yes I kissed the brick :D

[stabthroughme]

Ilya complaining about the pickles that are widely available in grocery stores not being “right” and he doesn’t want to make his own or drive all the way to the European market or farmers market once a week to get good pickles.

Their All Stars break doesn’t line up and Ilya’s got a week of away games.

Shane goes IN on research. Makes seven different kinds of pickles (carrots, parsnips, onions, beets, three different kinds of cucumber pickles).

He has to leave right from the All Stars game. He tells Ilya as they’re packing up their stuff that he left Ilya some presents in his fridge in Ottawa.

Ilya gets home and depression naps bc his beloved Shane is so far away from him. Wakes up at midnight and remembers Fridge Gift?

Finds the different pickles labeled with what they are and what he used in the brine.

Stands there with the fridge open long enough that it yells at him that it’s still open and scares the shit outta him.

Shane who drives to Ottawa after his roadie to spend his day off with Ilya.

Ilya who greets him with “pickles????”

Shane who is taking off his shoes and hanging up his coat explaining that he figured if Ilya missed them he could make more.

Ilya fucking Shane so good bc he made Ilya pickles.

[stabthroughme]

I need an AU where Shane and Ilya end up training together one summer, before Irina's dead, and Ilya comes over with a Russian group of players.

It would be normal for Ilya to stick with the Russian players, to keep speaking Russian and only train against the other players.

Except Ilya loves playing against Shane, and Shane's obviously been cast out to the fringes by the English and French speaking players. So Ilya pulls Shane to the Russian group.

Right to the centre of it, bc Ilya's got the same charming pull to him even as a child.

And when the other Russian players say that Shane's too weird to keep hanging out with them Ilya says "fine" and leaves with Shane.

And Yuna who's heard so often from her son's teachers that he's always been on the fringes, who's heard from Shane that he "doesn't really have any friends at school", who knows his hockey teammates still think he's weird but at least he's good and funny, gets to witness her son get chosen by someone who was pushed to choose. Even if Ilya's struggling to communicate with her and with Shane, he doesn't go back to his Russian friends.

He doesn't go the "easy" route.

I just think Ilya choosing Shane when all the other kids around them can sense the different-ness of Shane's autistic ways would be so good.

Especially when paired with them being penpals but the letters stop for a couple months and Yuna has to prepare herself to talk to Shane about how Ilya's left him too.

Shane who finds a hockey training thing in Russia for the summer, applies and is ofc accepted, and when he shows up with Yuna in tow ofc Ilya is there and he looks so so so sad.

And then Shane calls his name and Ilya looks at him with disbelief. And Shane asks if he's okay and Ilya, who's never actually lied to Shane before, tells him that Irina's dead.

Yuna watching her son hold his best friend together and telling Ilya that she's gonna look out for him now.

[stabthroughme]

Troy Barrett learns how to crochet from the Drover sisters and starts crocheting on planes when Harris isn't on the trips to hold his hand. Then he starts teaching Luca.

Then he's teaching Ilya and Shane.

And then the Centaurs are all crocheting little plushies and bag charms and shit for their hospital visits.

Harris takes a photo to post abt how the Centaurs are dealing with a plane delay for a stressful game and it's just all the guys in an airport terminal crocheting things.

Shane is being used as a stand-in for the hat Ilya is crocheting for David. Shane's making a little hockey puck keychain for Rose. Luca's making a cover for his sketchbook. Bood's making Cassie a sweater with some really fancy yarn. Wyatt's making a life sized bulbasaur and his hand is all the way up his bulbasaur's ass shoving stuffing into it.

Troy isn't in the picture.

People panic Troy's injured.

Harris has to post a separate one that's a selfie that shows Troy fast asleep koala-wrapped around Harris in Harris' lap.

[stabthroughme]

Ilya gets injured, it’s his fifth season with the Centaurs (second with Shane) and they won the cup the previous season and are looking like they’re going to win a second.

It’s not that bad, just a few dislocations. However those dislocations are his hip, ankle, and knee. He’s in a full leg compression splint. He’s out till the playoffs at least.

And Shane has to leave him. Again. Because their team needs him.

So Ilya is sitting at home with Anya, watching games and having depression fuelled insomnia.

It’s Harris who suggests Ilya take temporary medical fosters. A set schedule to make sure an innocent animal isn’t in pain and will eventually find their forever home.

So he takes in a tripod, fresh off of surgery. There are pain killers and appetite stimulants and low dose sedatives to make the crate rest easier on the poor thing.

Anya is so gentle with the new puppy, laying by the crate and being emotional support.

When Ilya’s cleared to do short walks is also when the tripod is cleared for short walks. He goes with Shane who understands why Ilya is fostering the dog and is so glad the tripod puppy is keeping Ilya from spiralling too much. Because Anya could survive the week without Ilya, but the tripod would be in pain.

Bood and Cassie end up adopting the tripod who’s so chill even off the sedatives that Milo pulls himself to standing with the tripod’s ears.

Ilya is cleared to return to the team for the playoffs but it becomes a Thing. If either of them are injured they take the estimate of when they’ll be cleared to return to the foster network Ilya found and they’re paired with medical fosters who need round the clock care for however long they’re out. It keeps them sane.

[stabthroughme]

Shane who joins the Centaurs and gets to have Ilya 24/7 now.

They still cling to each other, but it's just as common to get kisses where they're both holding things (hockey gear, plates of food, etc) or have their hands in their pockets where the only thing touching each other is their lips.

And it's a whole other level of hedonistic affection. It drives both of them crazy that they can just have this.

They will be bickering back and forth, Ilya's hands full of hockey gear and Shane's hands in his pockets and then pause because Ilya just says "kiss" and they kiss and go right back to bickering. Only their lips have touched.

Because they don't need to cling to each other every chance they get, not anymore. Because the world knows that Shane is Ilya's and Ilya is Shane's and nobody looks twice at them exchanging quick kisses.

[stabthroughme]

I fully am camp Marleau knew shit abt Shane and Ilya and didn't say nothing.

I think he assumed it was like, hate-fucking though.

It takes them getting outed and their post abt "several years" for him to realize Shane=Jane and then has a "holy shit" moment in the group chat.

And he's also the one who rounds up the Boston Boys for Hollanov's wedding bc they are going to show up for their boy.(It ends up being a great way to stick it to Montreal too, but that's a side effect)

Svetlana makes sure the Boston Boys are all in appropriate attire and flies out with them, and she finds out that Marleau also knew but said jack shit bc Bro Code.

She is pretty damn impressed with his ability to keep shit to himself. She considers letting him fuck her about it.

[stabthroughme]

I think so often about how Ilya gets to the meat of people quickly. It’s hyper awareness. It’s a trauma response.

But also I think he should combine it with Shane’s need to know things. Because Ilya just gets A Vibe and isn’t always sure why.

“Our rookie seems to be very interested in picking mushrooms out of food.” Dropped in the muddle of a day off when Shane has a shoot scheduled.

“His sister’s allergic.” First thing Shane says when he returns from his shoot. “Probably runs in the family, or just super cautious” said to Shane as he climbs into Ilya’s lap and slots himself into Ilya’s arms.

Do you see the vision?