staffs-secret-blog had “no fucking clue”…. Maybe you can prove your superiority by answering the following riddle with your great staff wisdom:
What is the secret of getting reblogs instead of just likes? After years on this black hole of a site, I have yet to understand.
Far be it from me to contest Staffs-Secret-Blog’s authority on the matter. Additionally they are superior in Fakeness to this account in every way. I will not seek to prove or disprove them in this post because I happen to like them and their stuff quite a fair bit. @staffs-secret-blog if you see this, you’re awesome.
Anyway, Staffs-Secret-Blog obviously felt that it is unnecessary to explain how this website works to someone who says they’ve been here for years. If you have been here for years then surely you’d have cracked the code by now. Then again, very few of us have truly “cracked the code” so to speak. Thing about Tumblr is that there’s no code to crack. No code to speak of, at all. Nothing to crack. Cannot emphasize this enough. But anyway. There is a possibility that you have in fact been here for years without interacting much and now you’re discovering the results of that. If you’ve not really ever made original posts before this point, without also reblogging a ton of stuff yourself, you will find having an audience difficult.
Veterans of this website understand that there is no guaranteed method for attracting a spike in reblogs…. if that’s what you’re after. There is only one thing that is guaranteed in this godforsaken dried up cowboy town and that is blood, sweat and tears.
As I said before in a different way: The goal of this site is not fame or attention (I say this rather ironically as a fake staff blog, trust me, I do see the irony), but rather to circulate and perpetuate the chaos on this hellsite (derogatory).
That being said. You do have options. Which are as follows:
You could straight up lie outrageously (which is hilarious and effective). Make up shit for your posts. People will either buy it or instantly know you’re playing around and either way it’s funny. (I’m thinking of @everythingispirates’s recent lie about the Pirates of the Caribbean gay divorce. Epic. Respect to you @everythingispirates, if you see this, I choked on my coffee when I saw your post, you fucking legend).
Post in a way that is either strange and chaotic or just generally magnetic and charming and utterly yourself. You may get noticed. You may not. Some people (I’m thinking of @firefox-official and @kristina100000 and @pukicho in particular. You three give me life, lmao <3) have done an excellent job of this. Being yourself in what you project doesn’t guarantee a following, but it does guarantee your own authenticity and sincerity, which is always an attractive quality anyhow.
Use well known meme sentences and phrases and repurpose them for your nefarious needs. This is done by many people on tumblr. if you don’t know what I’m talking about i can’t help you . Sorry. It’s a dog eat dog world. I don’t give more advice than this
Make memes based on current events or new media content, and post them. Idk. *slaps the table* BUT DO IT
Keep your posts either to 1 sentence, 2 sentences, a short paragraph, or a fucking massive essay. Short formats typically work better but then again, there are posts out there (do you love the color of the sky, for example, or the full script of the bee movie) that are known for their unusual length, so this is not a general rule
Rickrolling is always a good idea. Here’s a great example of a post that does it well here
Make a themed account with themed posts and tag the posts for that niche and that niche only. That works well for people and will attract an audience that you can relate to. Maybe. This is totally based on chance lmfao.
Actually. Tag your posts appropriately in general if you can (which often fails completely, bc sometimes a post with two (2) tags will blow up and sometimes a post with dozens of tags will fail completely). avoid tagging the wrong things because sometimes this can be truly upsetting to people
Use fucking Tumblr blaze if you can afford it. @horse-at-law is an excellent example of how to use the sponsor function correctly. THIS LAWYER ^^^^ KNOWS WHAT THEY’RE TALKING NEIGHING ABOUT BTW. 11/10 RECOMMEND
Sell your soul to the devil
Become a gif making account for various fandoms idk
Pretend to be an official account for a social media app (cough) I love all you @staffs-secret-blog @official-twitter @officialstaff @firefox-official chaotic individuals
Pretend to be a bot account (like the “I love you” bot or the “haiku” bot). Which not only will cause people to block you because you look like a bot, but it will also strike fear into the hearts of beings everywhere. Alpha move. Do it, I dare you
Post pictures of cats, chickens, dogs or dinosaurs with unrelated captions. Or no captions. And completely unrelated tags. You’re not trying to make this easy for people you’re trying to make it FUN IMPOSSIBLE
Join an active fandom you like and make content for the fandom. Besides you’ll meet people which is always cool.
Very very rarely, and only in situations where it is appropriate, use the devastating move called Kung pow penis. Don’t overuse this weapon. It can cause mass destruction.
In general just fucking post a photo of something random with an equally random caption and just see what happens. For science
Beg the staff to give us back the crabs
Post the lyrics to a song and see if anyone replies. Idk it’s probably just a shout into the void but worth a try
Occasionally use the “Get Drinked” move. Effective way of ending a reblog chain.
If all else fails, make a Superwholock post and see who rises from the depths
All this should show you that there is not ONE method.
And it should demonstrate that most of it is bullshit.
And that it’s mostly down to chance.
But reblogs are key to the health of the Tumblr ecosystem so your question was worth answering in this case.
The best way to get reblogs and likes is to reblog and like things yourself. You won’t get reblogs just by making your own shit exclusively. Also idk how many reblogs you’re looking for. But whether it’s 2 or 200, it pays to be nice and it pays to be generous. No one on this site gives a fuck about being famous. They just like the vibes. If your vibes are good, people will notice. That’s what matters, mate.
