#star makes personal posts

[star55]

going to be angsty on main.

i have been loosely planning a sequel to bed chem in my head (and semi in a word doc) for about a month now. but i just wish i had someone i could talk it out with.

like to bounce ideas off, and for them to tell me if something is too stupid or whatever.

massive sigh.

[star55]

i don't think i said it here, but i've written half a million words (!!!) of caitvi fanfic this year.

the series i just finished is currently at 250k words across 40 fics (before editing too).

the lesbians. they inspire me

[star55]

i'm scrolling from weeks ago (it's a thing i do, shh), and i see a post where someone i follow says they had a manic episode (direct quote) and wrote 300k in 6 months.

so does that mean me writing 212k in 54 days count as a manic episode? because i never know how to tell these things.

but the lesbians inspired me? so... *shrug*

[star55]

ngl, if i were to write shades of pink today, i'd do so much different. me of 10+ years ago writing that was Going Through Things.

i am, now, Going Through Things, but differently.

[star55]

i can't help but be disheartened by the lack of loves my fic has been getting lately. especially since i've had to private all of my fics because of ai scraping losers. it's a big ol' kick in the teeth tbh.

[star55]

.

[star55]

i come on here, and i see people disrespecting my sexuality again. 

the rounds of ‘you can’t be a lesbian if you like a boy band’ (and variations of) are happening once more, and i just want to say: i’m 35 years old. i’m a lesbian. i’ve been a lesbian since birth. i’m always going to be a lesbian. and your lesbophobic ideas about lesbians not being able to like boy bands is so fucking stupid.

because apparently i’m just faking it, right? to what? get some random boy band members attention? 

fuck that right off.

[star55]

this’ll be the first year in i don’t know how long that i’m not posting a fic on my birthday.

well that’s all kinds of weird.