#stav rambles

[jade-is-stav]

UPDATE ON SPN!!!

i am getting closer and closer to the season 4 finale and the episode about the Jimmy, the vessel of Cas just broke me.

"aren't you gonna say grace?"

"no, i don't think i will."

the journey that Castiel, the angel controlling his body, went through regarding doubt and faith was so impactful it made Jimmy doubt his faith as well I'm gonna cry that's so good

[gay-otlc]

I was ranting to a non of binary friend about gender roles and then a mutual friend came into the conversation because she thought we were talking about cinnamon rolls. I explained that we weren't but cinnamon rolls are way better than gender roles. In related news, I want that on a t-shirt

[jade-is-stav]

thanks to a friend's recs i started watching spn like a month ago?

anyways I'm four seasons in and here are some of my thoughts so far!! :D

(spoilers ahead for spn season 1 through 3 and the first half of 4)

i really like how trauma is treated in the show. it's basically in every part of it which is very relatable for some and i feel that the way they talk about their experiences in the show is teaching. sam telling dean "you won't talk about it and i won't push you" was very nice to hear, and i think I'll take that sort of thinking moving forward.

one of my favourite episodes was the groundhog day episode. just the way they made sam see dean die over and over again (while deans time is already getting shorter) only for him to die the moment they "get out" of the tricksters trap, made his death right there be so devoid of meaning, we and sam already watched him die so many times, it lost all the emotions around it. and so when sam finally got him back it was actually heartbreaking i cried i really liked that [taking away the meaning of death -> killing him for good, and bringing the meaning back -> getting dean back, with his death now being so meaningful]

the angels are so batshit insane. ig it's just the fact they don't have emotions or smthn but it's so crazy it's really interesting honestly

the contast between dean and sam is really interesting too, with sam being a Christian while having like a weird sexual relationship with a devil and dean being agnostic (i think) to the point he can't believe anything good could happen ever let alone to him, and then being saved by the angel castiel (cause he has a crush on dean istg) is such an interesting contrast!!

anyway I'll keep watching the show and might keep rambling on it here byeeeeee

[gay-otlc]

I don't think I'm out to my dad as genderqueer but I did tell him once my ideal body would be an owl house abomination, so I think that sort of counts as coming out.

[gay-otlc]

I feel like spotify should have a sort of mini monthly wrapped. The year is a long time. March Shai is a fucking stranger, I don't care what ae listened to. I want to know how gay and mentally ill I was this month. You know?

[gay-otlc]

Shoutout to the old Jewish man who was in the kosher aisle of the store today and laughed when I glared at the boxes of matzah to whisper oh, hell no. Sir, I hope you had a fantastic day.

[gay-otlc]

The gender euphoria from giving yourself both the femme-aligned and masc-aligned roles in a discord server. Unmatched.

[gay-otlc]

Calling yourself a woman and a man in the same sentence is something that can be so gender