Lover, you should've come over
Steve was not a hero, but you were and why did the hero always have to die alone?
This is pure angst. Language, character death(s), sacralises, tissues? Gif credits: go to @levanterhaze
Steve Harrington was never meant to be the hero, but he did fall in love with one.
While Mike, Dustin and Lucas were busy finding El in the woods you'd been busy building a life. You had a fake name, a fake life- a regular one.
See, when Steve met you he met you by the pretence. You'd turned up in school a year before everything that begun, settling into high school life quick, like you were trying to hide. No new girl got through without Steve's attention and he was annoyingly enamoured by you.
You weren't trying to be known by him, or anyone. You kept your head down, did your work and didn't make a sound.
Then Will Byers went missing, then the gate opened and closed and opened again and the both of you were taken into a world of monsters. Except it was always your world and kidding yourself any different was a game.
Steve always remembered when he and Dustin found you in the woods, in the small garden shed you'd made a home, sobbing because you were a monster, like them, like everything they fought against.
002.
But Steve never saw you as that, just like Mike never saw El as 011. You were a person with a name you'd made for yourself and you... you were Steve's person.
────────────────────────────
" We don't need a magic bean!"
Nobody had been listening to each other, let alone Steve as they all tried to come up with some great plan to kill Vecna. But he yelled out and got everyone's attention.
Steve bristled under the eyes watching him, looking for help. He met your gaze and found your small smile.
You nodded. You always knew Steve knew a little bit more than he let on and maybe than he knew. There was no time like the end of the world for him to figure it out.
Steve met your gaze and took a deep but shaky breath in. " We... we don't need a magic bean. We got a bean stalk right here."
No, you did not doubt your boyfriend but you wished he'd get to the point.
Steve gathered everyone around the table, grabbing a torch and a slinky.
Robin followed next to you. " Does your boyfriend think now is a good time to play with his toys?"
You shrugged. " He might yet surprise you."
" Dingus usually does," she smiled, nudging you with her elbow.
Steve placed the torch up and began: " Okay, this flashlight is the Squawk radio tower and this slinky is the bridge," he said, putting it over the torch. " We'll never reach the Abyss from the tower, right? But Max said Vecna is drawing our worlds together. So, we let him and we wait and we wait as he draws it closer and closer. When it's close enough and the tower is poking through one of the rifts and boom, my girlfriend makes her move-"
He said it so proud, throwing out an arm in your direction.
Some thought this wasn't the time for him to be bragging and flirting but few smiled.
Steve gave you one of his grins before turning to your sister. " And El, of course. I'm talking meditation things, entering Vecna's mind, ambushing him. In your face dickhead and then, stopping the spell, halting the worlds from moving and- boom! We've got a beanstalk, it's perfect."
Dustin shared an astounded impressed look with you.
That was your boyfriend. Your boyfriend who never had to be in the fight but stayed because he loved you and had made a promise that one day it'd all be over and you'd live happily ever after.
" All we gotta do is climb up it into the Abyss."
Erica nodded. " I like it."
" It's not totally insane," said Mike.
" Thank you."
" But there's a big problem, a big one."
" We can't reach into Vecna's mind when he's too far away," said El.
Steve sighed, thinking his plan had failed.
You knew it hadn't. " Maybe not," you said to El, taking Steve's side and taking the slinky. You needed to do something with your hands. You'd been avoiding El for reasons you still couldn't face. " If the Upside down is under his realm or whatever it's still frozen in time which means all of Brenner's things will be there including-"
" The bath," said El.
" If you can make it into his mind, I can walk you through it, guide you," said Max. " I know his sick mind in and out."
You looked at Max, who was as much a little sister to you as El. " You've already been through so much."
" I can do it," she insisted.
Steve's hand squeezed your shoulder, a small curve to his lips to comfort you.
" I should be there too," added Kali. 008.
You had not met her with El, you only knew her as if today. The one who wanted to kill Dr Kay for the experiments she'd done and kill Henry. The one who wanted it all to end, one way or another.
You looked to Hopper as Kali spoke. His head shaking just enough for you to tell he knew what she was doing and he didn't like it.
There was a needle at the edge of your mind, a pull for attention.
El.
You glanced at her only a little. She stared blankly at you.
You straightened up, grabbing the hand Steve had on your shoulder and held it. You banished El from your mind. She only winced enough for you to see.
" Dig it," said Steve, breaking you out of your trance. " Kill the dick, rescue kids, we're all heroes. If Lucas is right we don't have a lot of time, so we have to move fast."
" One final thing," said Dustin, walking over to the two of you with a timer in hand. " The cherry on top. On the way out we drop a bomb near the exotic matter. Set a timer, escape the Upside down. The bridge collapses and with it: the Abyss, the Demos, the Mind Flayer, all of it, gone. Game. Set. Match."
You smiled at Dustin. You hated to see the bruises, the cuts on his face but knew you were slowly getting him back. That grief was slowly becoming something for him that he could wear and not be itchy in. You ruffled his hair under his hat. " Game set match."
" Let's do it," said Nancy, nodding. She was already gearing up for the fight of their lives. " Kill Henry, save the kids get the hell out before it blows up!"
Lucas yelled an agreement, his sister following as everyone hoped. There was a chance, a high chance you did it and all got to go home.
" Did I just come up with the plan to save the world?" asked Steve as the gang started to pile up to ready themselves.
You glanced at him. " Was about time." You rose up, pecking him on the cheek.
Everyone got to business, everyone but-
Steve's arm wrapped around your waist and tugged you into him. You'd have gasped if Steve didn't slot his lips over yours, kissing you deep and pouring everything he'd ever promised you in the kiss. His arms were tight around you as you bent at the knees, arching into him as he dipped you.
He pulled the both of you up. You squealed.
Steve pulled back, gazing at you. " I love you."
You looked down at his lips, up to his eyes. Your fingers brushed his cheek bone as you brushed back his hair. You wanted to remember it all.
Steve kissed you quick before moving past. " I've got a good feeling about this!"
Your stomach was twisted into knots, un-determined if they were the good sort that came with hope.
" Hey kid, you ready?" you heard Steve ask.
" Yeah, Steve. I am." El.
You turned in time to see Steve place a comforting hand on her head. You knew he wanted to ruffle her hair as he often did with Dustin or Max but it was brushed back and gelled in place.
He left you and El alone.
El stood there like she didn't want to be where she was. " Can we talk?"
It was the talk you never wanted. The sort you'd hoped wouldn't have to be said out loud because looking at you sister, you already knew what she was going to say.
────────────────────────────
So the battle was won and all bad things must come to an end.
The Abyss had been made of sand, fire, mountains and rocks that jutted out more like talons and claws.
It had been you who took the axe to Vecna's head as he lay impaled on one of his own spikes. He had turned to you, recognising you as the closest thing he had to an ally when under Brenner. He'd spat our blood as he pleaded.
" Please... no."
You took the axe to him and in two harsh fell swoops killed him.
Still everything weighed heavy. Your talk with El, Kali's death. And Steve-
Jesus Christ, you'd almost lost him. You'd been with him when the radio tower met the crashing down sky and he pulled you to safety, tumbling down himself. You'd never been so terrified in your life, never felt your pulse race as fast as it did then.
You'd dove for him without care if you went over with him. You'd caught him in time and the both of you had collapsed holding each other. Still it wasn't enough.
Steve drove the truck with the kids in the back and the party.
As much as you wished you could sit next to him, hold him too tight you thought you might throw up if you did. Why he had to run under the belly of the beats and pop those eggs, you'll never know.
You settle for winding down the window and lie your head out. " Never thought there'd be a day I like breathing this stuff in."
" Hey, what're you doing? You're gonna get cold," he said, reaching for your hand and holding it.
" I'd rather die of frostbite then have to not have the window open," you said. " Steve, I love you but you're killing my nostrils. You stink."
He cringed, daring to look at you. " That bad, huh?"
You looked at him and slowly nodded. You squeezed his hand.
With great apprehension, Steve bowed his head and took a whiff of his jacket.
" Holy shit," he didn't even let go of your hand, driving with no hands on the wheel as he quickly cranked down his own window. " God baby, how can you even be sitting this close to me?" he gagged, fingers gripping the wheel tight.
You smiled at him. Because no matter what state, beaten up by bullies or Russians or demobats, you'd always be with him. You'd never have it any other way.
There was a sudden blare of horn and a flash of light as a military truck over took you. There was only a glimpse of Hopper and Murray's grinning faces before they cut you off.
" Assholes," you both uttered.
If Steve didn't have one hand in yours and the other on the wheel you were sure he'd have flipped them off.
But he wasn't letting go of your hand until he was.
" Hey, I know that was difficult back there but you did it," he brushed his hand through your hair, however sweaty and covered in sand it may have been.
You relaxed into his touch.
He glanced at you. " Hard parts over and now we get the rest of our lives."
Steve went back to watching the road but you watched him.
" Tell me about the rest of our lives," you said like asking for a story to send you to sleep.
Steve didn't take his eyes of the road but he licked his lips and there was a glint of excitement in his eyes. " Okay... okay, well you know about the six kids we'll be having."
Any other time you'd have kicked up a fuss about six, instead you nodded and waited for more.
" And every summer we'll go up somewhere, Yellowstone maybe. You know like a real family like we never had. But before that... I mean, I've been thinking. We get jobs, maybe sell my parents place and get somewhere smaller and save up to get that house you like Forest Hill. We'll paint the kitchen yellow cause you've always wanted a yellow kitchen. I figure Dustin won't let us off that easy, he'll be on uncle duty, heck he's probably got Godfather t-shirts ready."
You couldn't help but laugh, only turning away when a stray tear rolled your cheek.
Steve looked back, trying to get a look at you. " What? What is it?" he chuckled.
You wiped at your face quickly. " Just. sounds nice."
" It will be."
Steve was looking at you when Hopper and Murray swerved.
" Steve!"
He only knew something terrible was about to happen because of the panic in your voice.
Spikes in the road were waiting to welcome you home, piercing your tires and throwing you off. The kids in the back screamed and yelled as Steve swerved, breaking hard and trying to make as safe a stop as possible.
You'd hardly gotten to a stop when your door was thrown open.
" Out! Out! Get out now!"
You did so, hands up.
" Don't touch her!" Steve yelled, trying to get to you over the seats, but he was being pulled out the other end. " Don't you hurt her!"
With a jerk of your neck the soldiers were sent crashing into the truck. In the middle of the chaos, dozens upon dozens of soldiers pulling at you all nobody noticed you run as you tried to interfere with everyone's minds so you'd go un-noticed.
Only one saw you.
El called your name but was thrown up against the truck, next to Mike. Their hands were reaching desperately for each other but never quite touched.
El knew what you were going to do. She couldn't be there with you.
────────────────────────────
Steve lost sight of you as he was being carted away by soldiers, guns nudging into his back harshly. " Alright! Alright!" he'd comply, heck, he'd been in this situation before. All he cared about was getting a look at you. He couldn't see you in the chaos.
The military, they'd use you and El just like they had Kali. Your life of freedom was supposed to start today, not whatever this was.
" Steve!" he'd wanted it to be you calling his name but it was Robin who was pushed next to him. Their hands were made up on there, guns at their backs.
" Robin! Robin! Where is she? Can you see her?"
" No!" she sounded as panicked as he felt. She looked around but nothing other than the kids being pushed and shoved, torn apart. Holly was taken from Nancy, Joyce was trying to hold onto Will and Jonathon at once.
Dr Kay marched past them. " Sargent! Sargent, where is she? Where's zero-zero-"
There was a sickening crunch that nobody could miss as Dr Kay's neck snapped and she crumbled to the floor.
The soldiers didn't know what to do, the kids all looked around in the shouting and screaming.
Steve tried to look for El. " El?"
There she was, next to Mike. But she wasn't looking at the dead body of the Doctor that was hunting her. Neither was Mike, or Lucas.
Steve's brows furrowed, lights blinding him slightly. It was Dustin who gave it away as he looked past Steve and toward the gate to the Upside down.
" Oh no," the kid had mumbled but it reached into Steve's ears as he turned.
Oh no.
Oh god no.
You stood in the gate. No soldier in sight, no friend there either. There was only you and what any minute could be death.
Steve pushed against the soliders with all his might.
" Steve!" Robin yelled.
The solider made a grab at him.
" Get off me! Get off!" he yelled, cried, pulled or pushed he didn't know. All he knew was that he couldn't stand still.
" Steve! Steve, don't-"
" I said let me go-"
Steve pitched forward but didn't land in the gravel, he landed in water, in some place dark and far away.
" Steve."
Was he dead? Had the soldier's shot him? Were the both of you dead?
He glanced up and found you walking toward him in the darkness, in the water. You were the only thing of light.
Steve got up and ran to you. " Hey, woah, baby, baby," the stress and shouting of his voice wasn't there. He coaxed you gently. He wasn't even sure he was speaking but he felt your body soften when he caressed your arms. " What are you doing? What are you doing?"
You shook your head, tears falling.
" Hey, hey, hey, why are you crying?"
" It's the only way," you chocked.
It took Steve a moment to realise the two of you couldn't just hide out in here. That this wasn't a safe space but a final goodbye in the hole of a void.
" No," he said, disappointed. " No."
" Listen to me-"
" No, I won't-"
" Listen to me!"
" Put me back! I have to be there- I have to save you!"
You grabbed his cheeks, caressing them. " You have saved me, so many times, more than you know. Let me- let me save you."
" Save me? You're killing me baby, you're killing me," he cried, gripping your arms hard enough to bruise. Good, If he hurt you you'd make him apologise to you a thousand ways. For that you had to stay.
" I know, I know it'll hurt at first-"
" Hurt? You're killing me-"
" But I need you to understand-"
" No, no I don't," he cried. " Why are you- why are you doing this?"
You squeezed your eyes shut, tears falling. " Because it's the only way. If I live there will always be a key to the gate, there will always be Henry's blood in me and there will always be a chance this happens again. To some other poor kids. To some other town with innocent lives that I can't put at risk."
" Well I can't lose you," said Steve, spitting out the words as the salt of his tears stung his cracked lips. He was losing breath. The very air that he breathed was you. " I won't lose you."
" I'll always be with you, for as long as you want me to be," you sobbed.
" Now," he said. " I want you now, here, with me, always baby, why can't you see that."
In desperation Steve grabbed your cheeks and forced your heads together, like by some divine intervention you would know his thoughts and feel his feelings and feel his very soul being ripped out of him.
" I need you," he grit out, chocking on a sob. " I need you, why can't you see that?"
" You've never needed me, Steve-"
" Yes I have- I have, I do! I am nothing without you, nothing!"
" I need you to-"
" No... no don't say it-"
" Tell the kids I'm sorry," you cried.
Steve pulled you into him, gripping you and hiding his face in your shoulder to cry. " No." How could he face them knowing he let you go? How could he even look in the mirror.
" Tell Dustin I'm sorry he had to lose another friend-"
" What about El?" asked Steve, weeping now.
" When-when this place blows I'll use the last of what I have... wipe out the soldiers. She'll have to run but we talked about this."
Steve looked back, looking at you. He couldn't quite believe his last look upon you would be blurred by tears. " We talked about it."
" Tell Hopper I'm sorry-"
" Why are you doing this to me, baby?" asked Steve, searching around you for a way to stop it all.
" Tell Robin I'm sorry-"
Steve cried. " We were gonna have kids-"
" Tell- Tell Lucas he better marry Max-"
Steve hung his head. " You were gonna be the mother of my kids-"
" You'll find someone else, Steve, you can have everything you ever wanted."
" We were- our kitchen was gonna be yellow."
You took his face again, trying to wipe away his own tears when your hands were wet with yours. " I will always love you."
Steve didn't have any time to argue. Your hands came down to his chest and he thought maybe you'd kiss him and he'd wake up from the dream- the nightmare this clearly was.
You pushed and then he heard screaming.
" Steve! Steve!"
" No, please, don't do this!" Dustin?
The soldiers picked Steve up off the ground and he was in the camp, watching you in the gate of the Upside down.
He couldn't understand, he would never understand.
Your nose was bleeding, your arm out-stretched as you kept El in her place as she screamed and writhed against whatever force stopped her reaching you.
You. You sacrificing yourself again and doing it all alone.
Because you always did things alone.
You always assumed you'd be alone, like-
Like Steve.
He wouldn't find another. You were his lover, his one and only. Steve didn't have a family he had you.
You had him.
" Steve, come back!"
What was he doing? Letting you play the hero, letting you kill all of the dreams you'd made together?
Steve was in love with you. He loved you.
And he'd made a promise when he found you crying in that hut.
You'll never be alone again.
No soldier could keep him down. No words could stop him and make him live a life without you.
" Steve! Stop!"
" Oh god, no, no!"
Steve pushed the soldiers and punched another in the face and then he ran to you.
You were so focused on keeping El back, letting the soldiers hold the rest of them that you didn't notice Steve running at you until it was too late. " What are you doing?" you yelled, blood dripping down to your lips.
Steve wasn't going to let you go down alone.
You die. He dies.
The children cried, the others yelled.
Steve grabbed you and kissed you, the iron of your blood, the salt of his tears and the roar of the wind as the vinyl ended.
You'll never be alone again.
The upside down closed in a ball of fire, taking you and Steve with it.
um... hope you enjoyed? GIF https://levanterhaze.tumblr.com/
