(Selective mutism, and regressing when triggered)
This post is partly inspired by this compilation from @givehimthemedicine
“my favorite El move is when people are begging her for information and she just stares at them until the scene ends”
Why does El do this? Easy! It’s CPTSD, selective mutism, and triggered regression.
All moments where El displays this behavior are in very high stress situations. Sometimes they are played more light hearted/with a somewhat comedic energy, but the context is always high stress. This alone could be enough of a reason for her fall back into her selective mutism, but there is something even more interesting here.
More specifically, it is always a response to being asked a question about using her powers. Usually, being asked to describe information she’s seen in the void. There is a very clear trigger here for these mute moments.
She is having emotional flashbacks to her one on one time with Dr Brenner.
Emotional flashbacks do not come with visual aspects, and usually the person experiencing them is unaware that their emotions/body are not in the same place that their mind is. (This is a symptom that most of the cast has experienced on screen, and have a lot more to say about it as a whole) El is reverting emotionally to that specific time in her life. She doesn’t see her friends as Dr Brenner, and probably isn’t directly thinking about him at the time, but her nervous system doesn’t see a difference.
There’s a lot of things I want to talk about with El’s selective mutism as a whole, but what I really want to point out, is that El spoke perfectly fine before the massacre.
Thanks to season 4, we now know that all throughout season 1, El had perfectly fine intellectual knowledge of the English language. As she began to talk more and more, she wasn’t learning all new vocabulary. She had words taught to her that she was not exposed to while in the lab. (friendship,compromise, etc.) But it’s most likely the case that her improved speech in season 2, was due to having someone to comfortably speak to on a regular basis.
Her relationship with Dr Brenner as the only number left, caused speech to feel dangerous for El. (Possibly from a period of prolonged punishment for speaking to Henry) It isn’t uncommon for victim’s of childhood abuse.
El’s ability to project the voice of the Russian man into the lab speakers, wasn’t her going above and beyond. It was probably easier for her to reach her abilities further than before, than to describe what she’s seen to papa. She was finding an alternate way of communicating that was safe for her.
What we've seen throughout the show is Eleven getting her voice back, because she starts to feel safe. This part of her arc climaxed with her monologue to Brenner in season 4. (It’s one of my favorite moments in the show)
These examples of her lack of response to her friends' questions, are her momentarily regressing to that small, voiceless, version of herself.
This specific symptom of El’s trauma is so important to me because I've experienced this exact same thing for many years. (like many symptoms this show demonstrates) It’s one of those PTSD symptoms that is so often surrounded with confusion and frustration. So it feels incredibly validating to see it portrayed here.
We never get the follow up to these moments with El, just the knowledge that the characters eventually get the answer to their questions. It makes me feel weirdly giddy to be able to easily imagine exactly what happens right after the camera cuts. Cause I’ve lived it.
Then again, I get that same giddy feeling from the whole show. It’s finally feeling understood
