The tarot cards have been asking for some attention lately. My health is not improving, and I was running out of places to turn for info. So, with my thyroid reaching beyond hyper and knowing circumstance was to blame, but without being able to get perspective, much less a handle on my stress level, I went and pulled out the tarot stuff.
The answer was just too obvious. I can't believe how long I had been trying without success to make sense of the last 8 months. Whatever; I finally came away with helpful information.
2011= Turbulent year for relationships and nearly constant adversity on the job. The feeling I needed to stay close to home and engineer protective mechanisms. A feeling of being turned to stone emotionally.
Looked up 2011 for myself and found my Chariot Year - description as usually uncanny.
2012 = Only increasing adversity in the job (how was that possible?). Constant questions about whether to give it up altogether. Ongoing fears of intimacy alongside instincts to reject all closeness even with family, all being very unlike the "me" that I identify with. Faucet-like release of emotions such that they seem to be my primary focus nearly every day since just before the holidays, significantly aggravating my health condition. Constant feelings of self-judgement as I evaluate wins and losses and mainly observe what feel like losses.
Strength Year validated.
Focusing now on advice tailored for Strength Year:
Turn passion into meaningful projects instead of wasting it or allowing it to become a destructive force.
Embrace what I feel to be ugly or beastly in myself so that I can build strength of character.
No big deal, I should have that done by lunchtime. HA!
Spotify: a song about embracing your shadow side, and not just what’s sunny. Marry the Night?