Hi all! Hope you are staying safe and warm this autumn. 🍁
Unfortunately, I've caught a cold. And also unfortunately, I am now both physically and mentally ill!
Given this time off from the daily cycle of school -> work -> study -> sleep, I've been given a lot of time to really think.
And honestly, I wish I didn't. It feels bad. 😢
I'm really nervous about a practical exam I have to do. Basically, I'm interviewing a (fake) patient for 15 minutes on how they take their medication. They're supposed to give me a "pink flag", something like hesitation, and that is supposed to indicate that I'm supposed to ask about it because there might be an issue. I'm supposed to somehow investigate that pink flag in a gentle, human way rather than interrogate them.
The big focus for this practical is not gathering a medication list, but rather on recognizing pink flags and being able to help a patient feel open enough to talk about things they might not want to say.
I feel... awkward? Not emotionally intelligent enough? I feel like a bad improv performer. I'm afraid I'm gonna miss the pink flag, or accidentally say something rude to my patient.
The next thing I'm afraid of is that I have to watch myself afterwards and write a report about what I could do better. 🫥
It's pass/redo, yet I am so scared. This is the first time my anxiety has really spiked in my pharmacy school career. (I'm surprised it took me until year 2 tbh!) This is the first time I've felt really unsure about my capabilities as a future pharmacist.
Typing this all out, the capstone seems so easy, but that's the problem. I fear this very basic task that's key to my career. 😓