#suffpsii

[psiioniic-exe]

Oh god did i do this right😭

[solluxfanclub]

I like problematic ancestor dynamics a lot(i think bc im projecting)

Like

Psii in my mind is... Heavily damaged, extremely traumatized, and rather unpredictable. Not evil by any means, but he acts as a wounded prey animal most of the time.

Severe separation anxiety, if signy is gone he will have a panic attack(even if the girls are there). He also sees signy as a surrogate master, and has(quietly) sworn himself to service.

Cries a lot, sometimes for no reason. Usually the reason is that he is catastrophising in his mind. But also... He is plagued with voices and visions. So like i get it dude.

Signy is a big big enabler, like, he unintentionally reinforces psiis anxiety and unintentionally conditions psii into needing him, rather than teaching/allowing psii to cope on his own(or even with help from dis or rosa). Signy will comfort psii in any situation, and almost always takes his side(seeing psii as someonewho needs to be saved and coddled), and this really irritates dis(bc she is, surprisingly, a lot more mature than signy), and sometimes she feels like signy plays favorites(its ambiguous as to whether or not he does)

Idk i just. The ancestors arent perfect paragons of like, what trolls should be. Theyre like. Damaged people.

[nightlight-stardust-and-rain]

I fucking NEED to write a Homestuck reincarnation AU with the ancestors. So I'll do it.

Tbh it'll be mostly our favorites hemoanarchist (gods do I love this word) ; The Signless, the Dolorosa, the Psiioniic and the Disciple. Because I love them, that's why. (let's say the Psiioniic died with the others bc if he's not dead he can't be reborn. He was still the helsman but for a shorter time)

So at first I was thinking "they could be reincarnated as Karkat, Sollux, Nepeta and Kanaya" but then I realized that there would be no Karkat, Nepeta, etc... And I love them. So nope nope nope. So I decided that they would be reborn six or seven sweeps before the beta trolls, with the same sign, same blood color and pre-scratch names. They're raised by the same lusus as their descendants. Now there's three ways to do it. 1) everyone remembers. 2) nobody remembers but they have feelings and dreams. 3) only one of them remember. The 3 would be interesting and sad ! Lots of angst. But as much as I love angst, I couldn't write it to save my life. I'm just overwhelmed by the "I want them to be happy". The 2 would be very interesting to write ! Slow burn and pining and also angst bc "why the fuck am I dreaming about my wrists burning ???". Also "I feel I loved you for so long but we literally just met ???". Nice. But sadly, I'll write the 1 ! Because I want to.

So. They're hatched like seven sweeps before their descendants. At first, they live their life quietly. Since Alternia is... Well, a whole planet, they never met when they were young (that would be too easy. They'll meet way later). They think they are alone :( cue angst. But their life isn't so bad. Kinda. Signless (and holy shit he has a lusus ! With his blood color ! He misses his mother but he's happy to have a lusus : he never had one before so) learns to shout loudly with Crabdad (lol) and doesn't go out much (bc you know mutant) but when he does everyone he mets is baffled bc he's super nice ?? He's like those people who smile at you on the streets and even if you know you'll never see him again you fell a little pale something. Half of his neighborhood got a little pale crush on him (he's totally oblivious because guess what ! He's still in love with Psii and Disciple). He studies psychology and other alien civilisations online bc he thinks it's interesting. That's all. He gives advices to people (he got a blog. He's pretty famous for his advice ! Both because he's wise and because his advices is always pacifist). He thinks he's in a other universe (again !) and then he discovers the story of the Signless (by sheer luck, since the story has been erased everywhere by the Condesce) and he's just baffled because wow, he's thousands of sweeps in the future ! Wow ! And also because "does that means that the Condesce is the same fucking Condesce that killed me/us ? WHEN WILL SHE DIE". The Psiioniic lives with his bipolar lusus (nothing new, he' s bipolar himself) and is the best hacker of all Alternia (come ON, of course he is !). Every goldblood knows him, there's a rumor (that nobody takes seriously) that he's the reincarnation of the Psiioniic ! (every time Psii hears this rumors he laughs so hard he cries. It's just so... So funny) he uses his skills for hacking more or less everything, subtly attacking the Condesce (nothing major he knows he can't win), fucking with highbloods (and if he specifically targets those cerulean that act like pirates, those indigo with bows, those violets orphaners, that's nobody's business) and search for the others three, because despite thinking he is alone, there's still a spark of hope (honestly, if we're being realist, he probably would have found them in one or two sweeps since he's really good. But that would be too easy ! So no). The Dolorosa is not in the caverns (and is thankful for that, because after a lifetime outside, she isn't ready to go back to this claustrophobic darkness where she would search and never find a hint of candy red). She does clothes. She's very good ans even does clothes for highbloods. She's both respected and feared. There are rumors about her, rumors of white light and stains of cobalt and violet blood on her lipstick. But those are only rumors, right ? It's strange for her to be this young, but it's also good. The Disciple lives in the forest, with her lusus. She's the best huntress ! Tbh she's a bit of a cryptid. People talking about the beast in the woods. Most olive bloods knows it's her ; she's not the first olive to live in the woods after all. She tries to find the remaining signlessists (is that how it's written ?) to 1) check if what they teach is really what Signless taught, because she knows how cults can be and 2) if they still have the right idea, maybe join them. Maybe not. She's not exactly a signlessist, after all.

Let's say it's a no game AU because I don't want them to die. Also, to be clear, I ship Psii/Signless/Disciple as in Psii/Signless + Disciple/Signless. I don't really ship Psii/Disciple, I see them as... Very good chaotic friends with blackflirting, could be pale or black or red but have this sort of "ewww" reaction about dating each other so no.

When they're seven sweeps, their lusus brings home a wiggler that looks exactly like them (everyone reacts differently : Disciple squeals because Nepeta is so cute ! Psiioniic look at Sollux like... What ? Is ? This ? Another Captor disaster ? In this house ? We're doomed. Dolorosa is surprised but well. She already raised a child, and this time her lusus will help. Signless is shocked. Really. He stays silent for hours and maybe cries a little. After a while they all figure out that they're their descendants - that leads to a "wait but if this is my descendant... Am I biologically my own descendant ??" confusion but eh). They're all very fucking surprised but well.

Nepeta grows up with her big Sister Meulin and their shared lusus. She never really understood that having a big sister was weird until she met Equius. After all, three of her friends also had siblings ! She loves her big sister ; Meulin is clever and nice and pretty and strong and she wants to be like her when she grows up ! But sometimes her big sister looks at the red blood of the beasts they kill with sad eyes, sometimes she draws a symbol Nepeta doesn't knows, she never kills bees, she has a lot of respect for the jades, and she hates being alone. Her sister hates loneliness more than anything. Sometimes, even with sopor her sister wakes up crying about people she doesn't knows. But her sister is the best of all. And when she tells Nepeta stories of love and equality, Nepeta listens, and understands.

Sollux grows up with his annoying big brother Mituna. They have this sibling rivalry (some trolls think it's blackflirting - ewww). His brother is the best hacker of Alternia and Sollux thinks he's very cool (even if he will never admit it). Sometimes his brother shakes his hands and legs for hours mumbling strange things (still moving still moving still alive not trapped not a helsman she's not here I'm not here) and touches the back of his neck, as if he expected something to be here. Some days his brother flinches just seeing pink. He spends days searching people online - Sollux thinks it's kinda stupid ; nobody has blood that red. His brother wears a necklace with a symbol that isn't his. He has three sharpies with three colors - Sollux expected yellow and blue and red but those are bright red and olive and jade. Sometimes he draws on his hands with those sharpies - always the same symbols. Sometimes he wakes up screaming and he talks in his sleep - about ships, about pink, about blue arrows and bright red blood and someone that was everything. Sollux doesn't really understands. His brother is sad half of the time, but it's okay, because Sollux isn't better. But he wouldn't have it any other way (he sure would like to do without the voices and the bipolarity and his brother's depression but we can't have everything)

Kanaya thinks her big sister Porrim is very wise. Maybe a bit too much for her age. Sometimes her sister seems very old. Porrim is beautiful ; the prettiest troll Kanaya has ever seen really, but there's a old sadness deep in her bones that's always here. Her big sister always hated the ocean. Most trolls feared it (because of the seadwellers) but her big sister hated it. She had an odd look on her face every time she saw a spider and never wore anything with blue or violet or pink. Her sister had a sad smile when she helped her to do her red skirt. Her sister is wonderful. Almost more like a mother to Kanaya than their actual mother. When Kanaya was little, she told Porrim so. Porrim laughed very hard and maybe cried a little, and Kanaya doesn't remember her answer (I have only one child, little sister, and it isn't you).

Karkat thinks his big brother Kankri was someone else, before he was his big brother. He sees many things on him that shouldn't be here. He sees his big brother rubbing his wrists sometimes, and flinches every time Karkat grabs them (Karkat does it because of that ; he wants his brother to know that he doesn't have to be afraid). His brother can't cook meat, because the scent of burned meat makes him gag and cry and rub his wrists harder. His brother never does anything to the little beehive on their house - he says he likes bees. His brother loves meowbeasts, like Karkat's olive friend. His brother believes in rainbow drinkers - it's strange. Rainbow drinkers doesn't exist after all ! When he was very little, Karkat thought that Kankri was a coward - he never fought anyone and was always talking about peace and equality and love ! Lame. But then when he was four sweeps he told his brother that he wanted to be a threshecutioner and Kankri suddenly looked very afraid. He explained him things ; about their blood, about the empress, about the culling, about equality. After that, Karkat decided that Kankri was cool in a very strange manner, and that peace and equality andd love wasn't that bad after all. Karkat thinks that his brother is one of those heroes we never talk about, and nobody remembers them because they did heroics things without hurting anyone or killing monsters. He thinks that being like his big brother would be nice. He knows he has anger problems, he tries to deal with it (it helps that he isn't the only one, with Sollux being bipolar and Nepeta being autistic). His brother helps him with his quadrant confusion, when he says he has a pale crush on Kanaya but he also has a crush on Nepeta and Sollux but it's like on all quadrants ! (yup I ship them all) his brothers laughs and tells him about his own history with his lovers and how they were everything to him without really being in a quadrant. It... Slightly help (Karkat still thinks his crushes are unrequited. Fool).

Those four little trolls grows up with their lusus and someone else, and it changes little things. Nepeta begins to write books of romance and adventure and she tells stories to those who wants to hear them. Sollux knows he can count on his friends and his brother ; he doesn't have to bear everything alone. Kanaya knows that if she doesn't wants to go to the caverns, her big sister will help her. She doesn't have to be an adult before really being one. Karkat is a pacifist and thinks his shouting skills are actually very useful to scold people (he isn't wrong). He wants to deal with conflicts without violence or blood spilled (especially not his !!!). He's working on his anger. It's hard, but he isn't alone. He told his closest friends about his blood color : Sollux Nepeta and Kanaya (he wanted to tell Gamzee as well but Gamzee can't keep a secret).

Honestly the reunion between the ancestors would be very emotional of course. Like at this point Karkat and Kanaya would totally be moirails and Sollux, Karkat and Nepeta would be dating (after a long chat about the quadrant thing they decided to say fuck the quadrant system). So they would like meet in person and their big brothers/sisters would go with them but like... Just to make sure they're alright you know (alternia is dangerous after all :/). And HERE'S the emotional reunion I guess. I won't write it, I don't know how to. But you see.

My main idea was a Reincarnation AU, then it became "Karkat, Sollux, Nepeta and Kanaya growing up with their ancestors but not as their ancestors and noticing strange things about their siblings". Hope you like it, because I sure do !

[theteams-notebook]

June 18, 2010

I messed up and didn’t realize that the people on Earth don’t communicate telepathically like we do on Mars.  It made Kid Flash and Superboy upset, so I won’t be doing that again.

SB and KF went off on their own in Mount Justice to cool off for a bit.  We just let it happen.  It’s not like we could catch KF even if we wanted to.

Robin, Kid Flash, and I went off on our own “mission” last night to find Speedy and invite him into our Team.  He declined and said some things that he may regret later on and that upset Kid greatly.  His invitation into the Team is always open, but I am doubtful that he will ever accept.

I found out that SB and I both like the sound of TV static!

It’s oddly calming.

We got to see Miss M’s Bio-ship, though!  That was cool and I’m super interested in knowing how it works!  She said it’s organic like her clothes, so there are a lot of possibilities that it could transform into!

(A polaroid photo of the Team standing by the Bio-ship is taped to the top left corner of the page.)

How did Red even know where we kept the camera?

I told him.

Why?

Who else would take photos of all of us??

We met a villain calling himself Mister Twister.  Initially, we had followed Miss Martian’s thought of him being Red Tornado.

He was definitely not Red.

Even though he wasn’t good ol’ Red, he was still an android.  Though, who made him, we still don’t know.  Maybe whoever made Red?

If Mister Twister was made by the same person who made Red, maybe there’s more like him out there somewhere.

(On the top left corner of the page, a polaroid photo of Mister Twister is taped there.)

Sorry for the terrible quality.  I moved too quickly while taking it.

Where were you even keeping the camera?

I have very deep pockets.

I always did wonder how you carried so many things with you.  I didn’t even realize you were carrying your goggles until you pulled them out!  You can’t even see them in your pocket!

KF is known to wear things with deep pockets or multiple pockets.  Like she said before, you can never be too prepared for a situation.  But even I draw the line somewhere.

I don’t wanna hear it from the guy with a utility belt that seems to hold everything we need for a situation!

You both contribute equally to what we need for missions.  It is good to be prepared for any situation.

[gutterwatergoblin]

happy birthday to my psii in crime @psiider!

(also based off of @commanderfraya‘s fic to own a galaxy)

[crimeronan]

happy birthday goblin!

so @gutterwatergoblin / @stainedglassgoblin had a birthday recently, and since they have drawn some GORGEOUS art for my writing & have also made the ancestors fandom even better than it was, i figured it was time 2 repay them with a nice thing

the answer to “what would you want an ancestor minific of” was “pale psiignless”................. i’m being.  Enabled

originally i was like “this is gonna be 300 to 500 words MAX” but wordcounter tells me it is over 1500 words so.  oops

anyway happy birthday!!  i hope u like this small snapshot of pale hurt/comfort nonsense

-

The second night Psii refuses to leave his cabin, you start to get scared.

He’s been with the group for a little less than two perigrees.  Despite his initial insistence that he’d “head out” and “stop mooching off you guys” once he found a suitable place to stay, he hasn’t sought a home in any of the three villages you’ve last docked at, even the ones with high populations of free lowbloods.  

Given the delight with which he’s taken to having his own cabin and filling it with collections of shiny but worthless trinkets, scraps of fabric, worn pillows, and pieces of hardware you don’t understand but he apparently does, you think he maybe doesn’t want to leave, which would be… more than okay with you.  He’s full of light and energy and intelligence and observations and a newly-voiced perspective that you’d happily continue listening to for the rest of your life.

But he hasn’t left his cabin for two nights.

You are, as a general rule, an advocate of private spaces.  Private land is questionable, but in your opinion, every troll has a right to a space of their own that is safe from anyone they don’t want to enter.  You also double down on this principle when it comes to Psii.  It’s -- important, for you, and for him.  It’s important that you don’t take things away from him.  He has lived his entire life with everything about his body and energy and mind subject to other people’s desires.  He still has trouble understanding that he can say no to touch or even general conversation.

It would be a special kind of cruelty, you think, to tell him that he can have a safe place and then rip it away from him.

So you haven’t barged into his cabin to ask what’s going on.  You have politely knocked at intervals and walked away when he calls back that he’s fine.  But it’s -- it’s not like Psii, is the thing.  His behavior can sometimes change like the tides, and his level of extroversion varies depending on his mood swings, but this is the first time he’s isolated entirely.  He doesn’t tend to miss meals (also has trouble remembering he’s allowed to take food from the galley outside a preset schedule), nor does he miss opportunities to climb the mainmast and declare himself Emperor of your newly-founded naval country.

He hasn’t eaten any of the food you’ve left outside the door, trays of dried jerky and preserved fruits in sealed bags, and that worries you worse than anything.

You rap your knuckles gently against the door, feel your pusher squeeze painfully when all you get in response is a low grunt.

“Psii?” you call, pitching your voice gentle but loud enough to carry through the door.  “Could I come in?  It’s okay if I can’t, but I’d like to see you, if that’s all right.”

A long pause.  Then his voice sounds, a low croak you can barely make out.  “You can come in.”

You keep your movements steady and measured as you open the door and slip inside, because you don’t want to frighten him with franticness.  The first thing you notice is the heavy weight of static in the air.  It feels like the oppressive weight just before a thunderstorm, except it’s localized to this one specific closed-off portion of the ship.  You don’t see Psii in the main room -- not by the stack of crates that serves as a desk, or in the pile of linens and laundry, or in the recuperacoon, or sprawled out with a mortal injury on the floor.

You push open the door of the small adjoining ablution block, and ah.  Here he is.  He’s curled up tight in the tub, on his side with his forehead pressed to his knees.  There’s no water surrounding him, but he has tucked his favorite blanket around himself, a pale silver fabric that ripples like starlight.  It’s silky on one side, the other sewn with softness, which he’s pulled up and tucked over one ear.

You sit down on the floor beside the tub.  His eyes are closed (though still luminescent behind the lids), but you think it’s a good idea to be on similar levels in situations like this.

“Hey,” you say.

You’re watching his face with an intensity that’s probably too much, but it’s hard to keep your voice light if you can’t funnel your worry into a different sense.  So you see the ripple up his back and through his muscles, his cheek and jaw twitching involuntarily before he whispers, “Hey.”

You don’t touch him -- you do not touch him without asking first, that’s one of the rules.  But you do gently rest one arm on the edge of the tub.  “You’re not feeling well, huh?”

His mouth pulls down at the corners.  He manages, through an impossible feat of physics and spine bending, to curl up even tighter.  After another endless moment, he mumbles, “‘Snot contagious.”

“I wasn’t worried it was,” you assure him.  “Do you - do you know what it is?”

“Yeah,” he says.  He opens his eyes and tries to focus on you, hazy, but a spasm of pain contorts his face and he squeezes them shut again.  You wait for him to elaborate, but after another half minute of silence, all he manages is, “I’m sorry.”

“You aren’t doing anything wrong, honeybee.”  The nickname comes without thought, makes you flush from your cheekbones to your ears, but his body relaxes slightly.

“I get sick sometimes,” he whispers.  “In my head.  Pain.  But it’s okay.  I’m not gonna… please don’t make me go.”

Your pusher clenches again, clamps a fist around your lungs.  You exhale carefully around the ache, inhale.  “Mituna,” you start, using his hatch so he knows you mean business.  Despite yourself, your voice threatens to crack, so you take another steadying breath.

“I can be so good,” he murmurs, earnest now, mistaking your pause for displeasure.  “Please.”

“I’m not gonna make you go anywhere.  No one is.  You have a home here as long as you want it.”  That reassurance comes quick and easy, at least.  “...Do you have to stay in the ablution trap?”

He sort of shrugs, inasmuch as a person can shrug when curled up on their side incapacitated by pain.  “In case I throw up,” he says.

Ah.  Now the situation makes sense.  He’s shut himself up in the easiest place to clean so he won’t inconvenience anyone with his illness, but he’s brought his favorite blanket to have comfort to cling to.  It’s the kind of thing that reeks of learned behavior.  You wonder how many times he’s had to hide and make himself small with episodes like this in the past -- but that line of thought is only going to make you upset and furious at trolls far outside your influence, so you put it aside.

“It doesn’t seem very comfortable,” you say.  “Do you want to move out to your pile?  It’s okay if you get sick.  I’ll take care of it, I promise.  That’s part of the whole community thing.  Taking care of each other.”

His arms are wrapped around his knees, the blanket tangled beneath them, but you see the fingers on one hand flex like he wants to knead something with his claws.  “I don’t think I can move.”

“Okay.”  You tap your fingers idly on the tub while you ponder solutions.  “How about I bring your pillows in here, then?  And your fabrics?”

His red eye opens a slit, looking you over, maybe instinctively checking for signs of annoyance and insincerity.  “I’d like that,” he says finally.

Having something to do, physically, to ease the pain -- that’s good.  The methodical motions of bringing in soft materials help to calm the worst of your jitters.  You help arrange the cushioning around him until he’s swathed in a veritable cocoon of coziness, infinitely better than the hard ceramic of the tub.

By the time you’re done, he’s uncurled himself part of the way, and he’s breathing easier.  The static is still heavy in the air, and the pain clearly hasn’t abated, but the worst of the tension through his shoulders and neck has relaxed.

You need to ask him to drink water; he’s probably dehydrated, and that can’t be helping his head.  But you’re worried about pushing him too fast when he’s only just relaxed, so instead you ask, “Is there anything I can do?  To help with the pain?”

He’s silent for such a long time that you think he may have somehow fallen asleep.  That, or he can’t think of anything, and you should grab the water flask for lack of other practical solutions.  But then he says, “Rub my horns?”

Which is an easy and actionable task.  Your relief at being allowed to touch him is just because you like helping people, and you do not need to examine it deeper.

Except when you bury a hand in his curls and scritch at his horns, he nudges his head into your hand with a tiny chirring croon that sounds like natural music, and.

Your pusher kind of does a flip that you just know Di would describe in prose as “pale as the blazing desert sands at high noon.”

Oh no.

[voidhopper]

redraw of this from only 4 months ago!

[daily-vantas]

Poly Signless With Des And Psii??? Plz And Thank

They’re a trio of dorks.