So, Graduation is in less than four months. Being 18 is great. You aren't considered an adolescent, or a pesky teenager, but an adult. Thing is; I'm actually getting more attacks than usual. I'm skipping out on school more than usual. If you guys don't know, I actually hate change. Like a change in the schedule, or a change of events. My class schedule was changed four times too quick, causing me to skip out on three days. I can't handle that shit. I get nervous, and tense, and absolutely fucking anxious beyond belief. I actually had to stand up for a girl who was being bullied (My one weakness and fear is bullying), and I ended up shaking like a fucking leaf in Hurricane Katrina. I was a wreck. Before that, though, I was in a mood, and I sassed a person who cut her finger or some shit and the guy who was comforting her told me 'Go fuck yourself'. Stage Two was waiting for me and struck. I was in tears, I was visibly shaking, and I was more stressed than a kid in an exam. After that, recently, actually, I had another attack, on a spirit day, and I was confused with the schedule and day, which was ugly sweater day and not hippie day like I thought. I walked past the same guy (Real asshole) and he mockingly said, "Nice Ugly sweater". You know how glass shattering can startle anyone in a tense moment? That was me x1000. I ended up telling him to go to hell, and immediately called home. I don't know what's going on anymore. My life is a big boiling pot of insanity, I can't seem to think straight, and I get little support from my friends. Not even you guys would support me in a time like this. I am a nervous, anxiety-powered wreck that could explode at any moment. I'm not myself anymore. I'm not as sassy or sarcastic, I'm not as motherly or kind... I need more support than I could ever have. Hell, I wouldn't mind if youtubers or popular artists pitched in. I mean, they're everyday people with uniqueness that gathered people. Honestly. I need happiness. I need love. I'm a shivering shell of sadness and anxiety. Please help me.
