#tai writes

[teacup-tai]

Me finishing writing a drarry fic for an anonymous fest while working 45h a week and travelling weekends and preparing for an international work project and trying to take care of my mental health:

Damn babe, you did it! 💃🏻😎✍️💪

[sunflower-rat]

Characters involved :

Tai - He/They

Ashevin - She/They

Tai leans out the window, letting the smoke from their cigarette dissipate into the cold sky.

From there, he can see the whole town - though it's admittedly small with how ne0w it is. He wants to comment about the monsters he can see clawing at the walls, but he sees no one near it and it's too preoccupied chewing on a piece of wood to do any harm - so he doesn't say a thing and let's it burn away as the sun dawns.

"Are you even paying attention ?"

Ashevin is pinching her nose when he turns around, and he smiles - his fingers fiddling with the burning roll of sage and herbs that he foraged instead of training the new recruits that'd just been placed under his mentorship.

"Maybe." He lets it linger against the window, watching the smoke drift out. "Wanna repeat ?"

She's annoyed, they know - but they can't bring themself to withdraw from the ledge.

"The opening day is tomorrow. I've left you the script in our room if you bothered reading it. That- and you never confirmed if you prepared all the currency necessary for the new recruits, or if you'd finished repairing all the extra rooms-"

It's one long list of responsibilities that they had long since pushed out of their mind. And yes - they've read the script - and they hate it.

It's formal - and strict - and it's everything they're not.

"Everything's going to be fine." Tai takes another deep breath, tasting the smoke as it leaves his lips. "I'm a Guild Master. I know what I'm doing - if anything you should relax. It'll make people tense." And he wishes the words didn't taste as bitter as the smoke that stains his clothes.

And he knows his words mean as much as morning mist.

By tomorrow morning it'll be worth nothing but an anxious chant in her head, and even though she claims she can't be there at the opening because she has to ensure the scouts at the border of their new settlement are safe and on the lookout for foreign soldiers that are surely looking for an excuse to hunt them down - she will rush back anyway, because he knows she does not trust him.

He doesn't blame her.

They're high right now, so his words don't matter.

Still, it hurts.

Kind of, he's not sure.

Not really, if he'll be honest.

It doesn't hurt, genuinely - but it bothers him.

It sits in the back of his mind as he combs his hair back and fixes his coat, the mask securely covering half his face.

It lingers so deeply that the irritation and distrust is all they can think of as they smile and welcome the new recruits and the people that will be their citizens from now on.

So their fingers trail against the floral cigar in their pocket, and they chew on the paper until it dissolves into spit.

He's not hurt.

Not really.

He's just annoyed.

And he's just angry - and he barely conceals his fangs as he greets Nivalis with the most sober voice he's had in months.

And when they recite her script by memory - they remember the way the pages burned in their garden, its words curling into the blackened smoke and the blood bleaching their leather gauntlets.

And she comes back - exactly as he expects her to - frantic and anxious as she arrives just as the event ends - and Tai stands at the guild hall to meet her, smiling as she returns.

And she'll find nothing out of place.

With everyone in their dorms and their money received - and hostile monsters struggling to climb up the walls, chewing against the wood and burning in the sun like paper.

"I want a detailed recount of everything that happened." Her words carry disbelief and doubt - and an order that doesn't reflect the fact that he has been a Guild Master longer than she's been alive.

And he's not hurt.

Not really.

He's just a little bothered is all.

But he doesn't blame her.

He can't.

So he tells her everything she missed, and he doesn't lie. But he omits the black smoke and the smell of burning flowers, and the script that's buried in his garden - as nothing but smoke and cinder.

[idea-w-retorcie]

no talk of god by tai (cover art)

That’s the cover art for the fic I’m currently working on. It has like 33 pages now which is exactly the half of the plot. It takes place before the musical and tells the story of how Jesus and Judas had met and what happened afterwards that caused their eventual breakup. I imagine it ends right before Heaven On Their Minds. 

There’s lots of things I enjoy while writing this story. I love the headcanons I’ve created like Simon with ADHD, trans Peter, closeted Judas with no dreadlocks just yet, John who looks like a very young ver. of John Legend. And I love adding bits from the Bible, some random Easter eggs here and there. Oh, and each chapter is the song title so I even have a full chronological playlist for the fic on YT to listen to while I’m writing. At this point I care little if it turns out great or not. I’m having fun and that’s the most important thing about writing fics, I think. Just having fun with it.

It’s obviously 2012 Arena Tour ver. so it’s like a modern AU... set in 4 BC. I’ll let you know when I finish it. Hopefully it’s going to be soon. 

[thusspoketrish]

Also, another one, hehe why not.

Trish, I'm OBSESSED with Super Rich Kids and I REALLY like your Blaise in that fic. So many layers and hues -- and the UST is amazing jntil- well, no spoilers. Could you tell us a bit of how you developed SRK Blaise?

Sending love and Zabini delights, tai. 💜

Tai!!! Happy Blaise Appreciation Month! And can I just say that your fic, The Truth Runs Wild, was SMOKING HOT!!! You now have a fresh-faced Blairon shipper, gimme all the sexy fun! I am a true convert and I am here for it!!! WHEWWWWW!!!! What a way to start off this blessed Zabini month!!!

Oh goodness! Gonna try to answer your ask without too many spoilers, ahaha! I wanted SRK!Blaise to be Draco’s forbidden desire! I think I had Sebastian/Kathryn from Cruel Intentions on my mind when I wrote their later interactions, where Bitty is concerned, especially. I wanted Blaise to be aware of his influence over Draco, but not manipulative. I feel like this meme encompasses Blaise’s situation later on in the fic:

I wrote Blaise from that sticky mindset where he loves his friends, and still Pansy, but is hung up on pleasing his girlfriend, later, fiancée more, so he comes off a bit shitty to put some distance between them all. Anyone familiar with this shitty rollercoaster ride will know that they shouldn’t hate the player, but the toxic game, haha.

Read Super Rich Kids here!

Read The Truth Runs Wild here!

[teacup-tai]

Hi tai, your wlw stories are SO GOOD! loved the snip you shared about Fleur/Pansy! I recently read your pansmione stories Nicotine/Linger and Breaking wild roses and was stunned by the way you write femslash. I know you like drarry, but you should most definitely focus on wlw stories. It's what you do best!

Aye, nonnie! You are so very right! wlw is my comfort zone, the place i probably thrive the most, because it's what passionates me to write. I agree with you, my drarry fics are not as good as my wlw. Unless we talk about Dragons Don't Know Paradise (50k, E, Drarry + Wolfstar) or Rebel Rebel (6k, E, Wolfstar), which are my personal faves.

For those who want to read my wlw works here we go:

Nicotine/Linger (26k E, Pansmione)

Pansy has been living a slow Muggle life in Ireland for five years now. Managing her anxiety and trauma with one too many drinks, way more anonymous fucks in loos than strictly advised, wonderful Muggle friends and a job that keeps her hands busy. Life is kinda alright -though a tad bit fucked up- until she stumbles into Hermione Granger in the Muggle Hospital.

This is a story about childhood enemies trying a tentative friendship far from the chaotic magical world. A tale about falling in love with the cute golden lesbian and the slow, ginger path of reconnecting with things that make you feel whole.

Breaking wild roses (stings like love's pain) (1,5k, E, Pansmione)

I feel like a scream is stuck inside my chest, creeping up in the deep dark hollow of my throat. It’s a mix of pain and agony. So to keep it down, I open my mouth and fill it with your soft, tender flesh. The bronze skin of your shoulder right against my tongue.

Scorching (1,5k, E, Pansmione)

We don't know how, but they're in this badly lit bathroom, having delicious crazy sex. And Hermione is left completely shaken. Porn without plot.

A Pleasure of Our Own (wip snip, Fleur/Pansy)

-------------

edit: on another note, I wish all drarry fests alowed wlw fics LMAO I would write much more indeed. hahaha

[teacup-tai]

Fic Claim: Leeward (Drarry, M, 8k)

Finally got time to claim my @hpweddingfest fic! Huge thank you to my darling mods: @maraudersaffair and @ladderofyears! My dearest @crazybutgood for the stunning beta work, and my super alpha miss @erajmcouts. This fic was a huge delight to write. I'm so happy to leave the whole break up and divorce vibes in the past and start my new Drarry break-up & make-up phase.

Leeward (M, 8k, tw: previous break-up, survivors guilt, mentions of unhealthy behaviour. Angst with a happy ending)

Summary: There’s a polaroid kept in the back of Harry’s nightstand drawer. Just the one. It’s Muggle and slightly yellowish. There are many other photos in a box in the back of Harry’s cupboard under the stairs—the one he almost never opens. A hidden box of hidden memories. After four years since their break up, Harry and Draco meet again at Dean and Blaise’s wedding. Now, between the turquoise sea and the white sand dunes of Fuerteventura, they will need to face their feelings.

Read on AO3

*Amazing banner by @maraudersaffair :)

[teacup-tai]

Fic: Nicotine/Linger (E, 26k, Pansmione)

This fic took a coven of amazing friends in order to come to life. @crazybutgood @erajakira @thistlecatfics @tackytigerfic @violetclarity @yrfrndfrnkly @olliemaye @sitp-recs @curlyy-hair-dont-care @hpwlwbigbang and the sprinting crew. With all this support, I managed to write a long-ish femslash story. I like to think this is a comeback, it feels like it. It feels like coming home, like full circle: the ship that showed me possibility to understand my own sexuality back in 2006 when I was 16, now is giving me the opportunity to keep exploring what it means to love women in my adult life.

This fic was very self indulgent, I wrote it for myself; to the teen that I was and the woman that I am. I wrote it thinking about how much I grew back in 2019 while living in Limerick, Ireland.

All the places mentioned in this story are real, some of the OCs are based on my Irish friends, the pubs and clubs and parks and restaurants we went. There's something very healing in paying a homage to the city that held me during the hardest heartbreak of my life, the city where I worked my arse off to get my Msc in Psychology while nursing a broken heart, researching, working and volunteering, managing so many fears and the always there feeling that I was someone who did not deserve love, someone who put her career aspirations and dreams first.

This fic probably healed a bit of the always there grief for not living in Ireland anymore. It also took me back to all the amazing experiences I had and the people I loved there.

Thank you to every single person who hyped me, held my hand and chatted about pansy and hermione with me. Specially the amazing artists who gave shape and colour to this story: @carlav-blogs & @digthewriter . Now, I can only hope you enjoy it as much as I did while writing.

READ HERE

Summary: Pansy has been living a slow Muggle life in Ireland for five years now. Managing her anxiety and trauma with one too many drinks, way more anonymous fucks in loos than strictly advised, wonderful Muggle friends and a job that keeps her hands busy. Life is kinda alright -though a tad bit fucked up- until she stumbles into Hermione Granger in the Muggle Hospital.

This is a story about childhood enemies trying a tentative friendship far from the chaotic magical world. A tale about falling in love with the cute golden lesbian and the slow, ginger path of reconnecting with things that make you feel whole.

[teacup-tai]

On writing femslash

I'm having a wee moment of deep feelings here. The first long fic I've ever wrote was a Pansmione, in Portuguese, back in 2010. It took me 2 years to write it and it was 95k long.

Pansmione has a very deep meaning to me, personally, as I was introduced to pansmione fics even before I read any drarry. A very dear friend told me about a fic, a Brazilian fic titled Forty Shades of Green (even before the 50 shades of grey came out) by nika-chan. It was eye opening, it was like freedom.

It was back in 2006, when I myself was still figuring out how to be bisexual when in my circle of friends and acquaintances I had no bisexual person to relate to. Those dark polarised years in Brazil...

Pansmione for me was an open door, it was like exploring all those feelings and attractions to other women in a safe way, in que quietness of my computer, in the tempestuous waters of my confused and eager mind. Before all the hell broke lose at my home and I was outed and so much trauma proceded.

Today, I'm feeling quite mellow. I'm almost finishing writing my new pansmione fic, it's not very long, not even 30k, but something inside of me is just moved by the fact that, after all this time, after all I've lived, I can still look at this pairing and feel connected, seen, real, understood.

Incredible how fanfics have been the biggest constant hobby of my life, as long as writing, and how much I appreciate the fact that I have this. I hope I can manage to finish writing it and sharing this new story with whoever wants to read. I'm eager to know what people will think of it, I'm eager to put out there my small bit of sapphic love in the open.