#talkbackwardstome

[twomountaincreek-blog]

Through the darkness of future past The Magican longs to see One chance[chants] out between two worlds: Fire, walk with me Procrastinating at my desk... #twinpeaks #owllighter #procrastination #davidlynchworld #talkbackwardstome #firewalkwithme #owlcave https://www.instagram.com/p/BrJ4BTRBrNP/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=r9y87mjtmqxw

[talkbackwardstome-blog]

Old Friends, New Problems

Zatanna: -I look around my empty room and sigh, so many memories. I reach for my purse ready to leave, for the last time. With another sigh I head towards my door- Artemis: -I reach for her door, lightly tapping as I bite my lip. I had been heavy in thought ever since the phone call from M'gann. Being so wrapped up in everything school related made me feel so out of touch with everyone, including Zee. I tap once again.- Zatanna? You there? Zatanna: -pauses with my hand on the keypad as someone knocks. The door slides open- Artemis? -a genuine smile spreads across my face, for the first time in what felt like days.  I move forward enveloping you in a tight hug.-

Artemis: Hey Zee! -I'm smiling ear to ear.- Feels like I haven't seen you in forever. -I pull away surveying the boxes stacked up in the room.- I heard you're packing. Zatanna: Packed actually -looks away sheepishly my smile falling- Y-yeah I was going to tell you... Artemis: -I wave my hand away.- Pfftt...don't even worry about it. -I look at her mischieviously.- Got a minute? Zatanna: -looks back at my room- I don't know Artemis I...I really should head back to my new place. Artemis: -I sigh before nudging her in the direction of the door.- Well you really have no choice to begin with since I'm kidnapping you. Zatanna: -sighs, watching your face- I really don't have a choice, do I? Artemis: -I smirk.- Obviously not. Your options include you going to lunch with me. Objections? Zatanna: None...except egnahc ym tiftuo rof hcnul. -a cloud surrounds me as my yoga pants and baggy sweater combo are switched out for a cuter outfit- Artemis: Always ready for any occasion. -I grin before we're at the zeta tubes.- We'll go to your favorite place. Zatanna: Hmmm -taps my chin sarcastically- showing up and forcing me to go to /my/ favorite restraunt, who are you and what have you done with Artemis? Artemis: -I roll my eyes and place my hand on my hip.- Oh, don't you start or I'll reconsider my generous offering here. Zatanna: -smiles, but can't quite manage a laugh- Right -I say typing in the coordinates for the Zeta beam closest to my favorite restaurant in Gotham before typing in a different code for a zeta in New York- Artemis: -I hear the my designation blaring from the computer, light engulfing me before being transported. I move away from the telephone booth that it leaves me in, and I wait patiently for Zatanna.- Zatanna: -walks out hoping you didn't notice my sudden change of destination- The restaurant is this way. -I mutter as I start to walk out of the alley and onto the streets- Artemis: -I'm already walking beside her, concern written on my face.- You know I'm not dumb right? Why'd you change the coordinates? -And maybe I should have more tact, but the words are already out of my mouth before I can stop them.- Zatanna: I...-hesitates, my steps faltering for a moment as I try to come up with a lie- I just didn't want to go to that cafe is all. Artemis: -I sigh, deciding not to press the issue forward. I stuff my hands into the pockets of my jeans.- Favorite places change, right? Zatanna: Yeah...-I watch the sky as we walk, Gotham was his place. No matter what Barbara had said about him moving to Bludhaven. I couldn't-wouldn't let him hurt me again. And if that meant cutting off all contact...so be it.- It's just another block up this way. -I say, filling the silence.- Artemis: -I give you a look, knowing what your motives might be.- So, tell me about your new place. You have good taste, so I can only imagine it being everything perfect. Zatanna: -glad for the distraction and change of topic, gives you a smile; but it doesn't reach my eyes- Well the add promised high ceilings, great views, and almost my entire life's savings. Artemis: -I raise a brow.- Wow. Sounds amazing. High expectations though. Zatanna: -bumps into your shoulder with mine as we reach the restaurant- And it lived up to everyone....er it will once I unpack more than the living room -I retort with a small smirk.- Artemis: -I smirk back.- Come on. You know you wanted a break. Besides, I bet you haven't eaten anything all day if I know your habits well enough. Zatanna: I- -I'm cut off as my stomach grumples loudly- Okay so maybe I needed a break. Hostess: Hi welcome to Rebecca's, how many in your party? Artemis: Just two. -I answer casually.- Hostess: -looks down and checks the available seats. Flashes a smile- Right this way please. -collects two menu's and leads the two women to a cozy booth in the corner- Jess will be your server this afternoon, have a good lunch. -flashes another smile before walking back to the front of the restaurant- Zatanna: -attempts to smile back, but I can't quite manage it- Thanks. - I mutter as I sit down, knowing she can't hear me- Artemis: -I take a menu in my hand, eyes set on a few items.- So. Ready to talk? Zatanna: -my grip on my own menu tightens as I try and force my tone to remain light- Talk about what? Artemis: -I raise my eyes above the menu in my hand, peering directly at her clenched fists.- I guess about whatever it is has you clutching your menu so tightly that we might be charged to replace it? Zatanna: -swallows as I set the menu down, my eyes on the table- I-....-hesitates before giving in, my voice soft and vulnerable- Dick and I....we broke up Artemis: -It all starts making a lot of sense in an instant. I feel angry with myself for not realizing it sooner.- I'm really sorry Zee. What happened? Why would you guys break up? I just don't get it. Zatanna: -my eyes fixed on the table I tell myself that I won't cry- I don't know. We hadn't spoken much since...Jason and then he called asking me to meet him and -swallows, my throat tight- then he broke up me, I left, end of the story. Artemis: -I find it hard to find words at first. I let her story sink in for a minute.- Did he even give a reason? He's not the type of person who would just hurt someone like that. Zatanna: -shakes my head- He said he was moving...and that he'd gotten a new perspective. Artemis: -I set my menu down, eyeing you incredulously.- Moving doesn't mean he's breaking up...did he actually say it? Like did he really say he wanted to break up with you? Zatanna: -my hands ball up into fists on my lap and I can't look at you- He said he couldn't do this anymore. It was clear what he meant. Artemis: Zee...-I lower my head, eyes closing shut for a moment. I feel horrible for prying in the first place, but seeing the hurt look on your face makes my heart clench a bit.- You can't honestly tell me that you're going to let this break up eat away at you. Yeah, I get it. I probably don't understand exactly what you're going through, but seriously Zee. Look at you. You're getting your own apartment with a view, you're a great person to begin with and I can't imagine you letting this keep you down for long. Zatanna: -takes a deep breath and looks up- Thank you, but....-struggles to keep back the tears- I-I don't think you know how much he means to me, Artemis. I love him, and I can't get him out of my head, I see him everywhere I go. And there's this pain in my chest that won't go away and-and I feel like I can't breath and -my words break down into quiet sobs and the tears start to fall- Artemis: -My brain nearly goes into panic mode at the sight of the tears. I realize my tactics won't work, so I offer her one of the napkins on the table.- Zee, I know it doesn't seem like it will...but it will get better. Geez, I wish I knew the right thing to say. -I bite my lip nearly cursing.- Men are really stupid. Zatanna: -dabbs my eyes lightly, with the napkin, trying to stop the tears as I laugh slightly at your comment- Maybe not /all/ men. Artemis: Are you sure? Because I have a redhead at home who think whining will get food in his stomach faster. -I chuckle before crossing my arms.- And if you still can't agree, we can at least say that Dick is pretty dumb for even thinking of dumping you. And by pretty I mean really. Zatanna: -manages a smile as I force the tears back, swallowing my feelings not wanting to burden you any more than I already have- Speaking of a certain redhead, how's the whole moving in with Wally thing going? Artemis: Well, you know how Wally can be. He's super excited about everything. I'm warming up to the whole moving thing though. Though I will say being further from the cave does make me feel homesick sometimes. -I say while thinking very fondly over a few memories.- Zatanna: -my smile falters as I relive a few of my own memories- Yeah...homesick -I mutter mostly to myself as I push down any stray emotions; I rarely got to see Artemis anymore, I wasn't going to bury her in my problems.

[talkbackwardstome-blog]

Moving Out

So moving out wasn't exactly what I planned. 

I had planned on ducking out with out anyone noticing horrible I know. I just wasn't ready to face anyone yet. I needed to leave the cave, to clear my head to forget about him. But M'gann and Raquel caught me and insisted on helping. So together we flew to New York, the ride was anything but chalant. 

Too soon I found myself crying in Raquel's arms, explaining everything to them. DickNightwing, the break up, how I felt; it all came tumbling out of me before I could stop myself. But they held me and let me cry, consoling me. I promised I would try and get over him I don't think that's happening anytime soon. And for the rest of the day we watched movies. All in all not a bad first day in my new apartment. 

[rocketingup-blog]

Journal Entry-

Today, Miss M and I helped Zatanna move into her new apartment in Manhattan.  The whole 'moving' thing came as a bit of a surprise...she wouldn't exactly reveal the full truth as to why she was moving. That is, until she broke down in her new apartment.

Turns out, her and 'Wing broke up. I had half a mind to march right to him and personally break his nose. Miss M was on the verge of restraining me.   She was really torn up about it. Seein' her like that hurt my heart. I was...I was planning on telling the two of them that...that I was pregnant.

But I didn't.

Instead, we had a nice afternoon watching movies together. And that was perfectly fine to me.

[talkbackwardstome-blog]

chalant fic/rp recs?

I have been waiting my whole life for this question.

In no particular order:

Rather Hurt Than Feel Nothing At All: (complete) There are healthy and unhealthy ways to grieve. This is the latter. Chalant.

My Darling Dear : (complete) She smiles and spreads her fingers out, examining it. She looks perfectly content, but he still promises to get her a real ring next time.

As Long As The Sky's Above Us, I'll Never Leave You: (complete) "NO!" the word ripped its way out of Robin's throat, hoarse and defining.He couldn't think about anything but her. About the sickening sight of her crumpled and broken, slumped against the ropes binding her torso to the cold metal chair.

All I Want For Christmas Is You: (complete) Zatanna and Dick attempt to have a real dinner for once when Zatanna get's a surprise.

Marry Me: (complete) He can feel his heart start to drum in his chest and before he knows it, he's walking towards her. He wants to stop and turn around, but something is stopping him from it. And then he's finally standing next to her. She looks up from her book and kind of smiles, acknowledging how awkward this is.

Baby Blue Eyes: (complete) The only reason that he knew her names was because she was in his Global History 101 Class. But he knew who she was way before that.

Tonight Feels Brand New: (complete) She even does his word-thing. That's like, bonus points.

These Little Thrills: (complete) She blinks and remembers walking towards it and then an explosion and crap, she totally wrecked his motorcycle.

Mathlete Swag: (complete) In which there are nerdy pick-up lines.

Well that's all I can find for now, I swear I had more. Anyway I hope you enjoy and be sure to leave feedback for the wonderful authors. Happy reading. 

[talkbackwardstome-blog]

Apartment Hunting.

I'm moving out of the cave. Everything is changing, for the good or for the bad mostly for the bad, and I-I just need a change of pace. Somewhere people don't know who I am, where I can be anonymous. Somewhere I can be upset for a while. The cave is great and so are my friends but, I don't want him to know where to find me. I won't be at his beck and call anymore I just think it's time. 

[completelywhelmed]

Chalant: All I Want for Christmas is You

As part of our Secret Santa exchange I wrote a fluffy chalant ficlet for our lovely Black Canary. 

It has nothing to do with our rp canon and I really hope you guys enjoy it and have a Merry Christmas. 

  “Etativel ot eht nevo dna esolc eht rood,” Zatanna said wiping a bit of sweat off her forehead with the back of her hand as the chicken made it’s way into the oven, the door closing tightly behind it. It had been weeks since she actually made dinner, and even longer since both her and Dick had been home at the same time to eat it. Just as she was about to start the pasta an aggressive buzzing sound filled the kitchen. Zatanna floundered for a moment trying to find her phone, before spotting it on the counter, “Hello?” she asked, slightly breathless.

     The voice on the other line snickered quietly, and Zatanna could almost hear the smirk in his voice, “Don’t start without me Zee,” Dick teased. 

     “I might have to if you don’t get home soon,” she retorted, matching his sarcastic tone perfectly. 

     “I’m sorry, this meetings taking forever,” Dick paused and Zatanna could tell that he was  running a hand through his hair, “But it looks like Bruce and I have ‘em so I should be home in about forty minutes?” 

     Zatanna smiled, squeezing her phone between her shoulder and ear as she grabbed a large pot from the cabinet above her, “Perfect, I just put the chicken in and it needs a while to cook.”

     There was some rustling on the other line and Zatanna could hear a few muted voices before Dick responded, “Sounds great, they’re calling us back in now. I’ll call you on my way home. Love you.” voices filled Zatanna’s ears for a second before the decided click of Dick hanging up silenced them and she was left with the sound of the radio playing christmas songs faintly in the background to fill the absence. Zatanna smiled to herself as she put her phone back on the counter before starting to fill the pot with water. “Evom ot eht evots dna trats gniliob,” Zatanna sung in tune with the music as the pot floated over towards the stove and began to boil. She smiled and moved towards the refrigerator when a sharp pang of nausea shot through her stomach. Zatanna covered her mouth and ran as fast as she could towards the bathroom. She fell to her knees in front of the toilet and vomited, a sheen of sweat covering her forehead.

     After dry heaving several times Zatanna wiped the back of her hand across her mouth and shakily stood up, moving towards the sink. The cool water rushed over her hands as Zatanna steadied herself before washing out her mouth. She then turned off the water and gripped the sides of the sink, staring at her own reflection in the mirror. Even though she felt ill her face seemed brighter than usual, and oilier too. Zatanna reached up and touched her face, this was the second time she had vomited today, and the fifth time in the past 2 weeks and she was over a week late...All of the color drained from Zatanna’s face as her eyes widened and her breath caught in her throat, “No...” she muttered to herself, stepping away from the sink. “No,” she repeated almost mocking herself for freaking out so much. “No way,” she said, making her way back towards the kitchen.

     The water had started to boil and as Zatanna opened a box of dry pasta noodles her eyes caught the digital clock on the radio; 6:07. She had roughly thirty minutes until Dick got home. She bit her lip, inwardly cursing herself for even thinking about it. “Ughhhh,” she groaned, throwing her head back and clenching her fists. ‘I can’t believe I’m doing this,’ Zatanna thought as she walked towards the front door, plucking a jacket off the coat rack and slipping her feet into a pair of boots. She grasped the cool metal of her keys off their hook and headed out the door, “T’nod tel gnihtyna nrub,” she called into the empty apartment, an afterthought, as the door swung closed. 

     An icy wind blew as Zatanna exited the small convenience store. It was less than a block away from their apartment, but already Zatanna was wishing she had grabbed a thicker coat. She hugged the crumpled paper bag to her chest as she walked, a slight flush still adorned her cheeks and she made a mental note to never go back to that corner store. Zatanna felt like the world was watching, and everyone knew what was in the brown paper bag. With a shiver the magician entered their building and gave a sheepish smile to the doorman before making her way to the elevators. Once inside she glanced down at her watch, 6:26. Twenty minutes.The elevator doors opened with a ‘ding’ and Zatanna had to force herself to walk calmly to her door. After fumbling with the lock for a moment, she made her way inside, discarding the jacket and boots, headed straight for the bathroom. 

     Zatanna closed the door behind herself and took a deep breath. She reached into the bag and pulled out the rectangular box, ‘ClearBlue Digital Pregnancy Test,’ it read, ‘Over 99% Accurate.’ “I hope so,” she murmured, sliding a finger under the cardboard flap and opening the package.

     Once she was done taking the test, Zatanna set the plastic test on the side of the sink and washed her hands, “Five minutes, I can wait five minutes,” Zatanna told herself, slumping against the sink, and sitting on the cool floor.  A million thoughts flooded her mind, A baby, a new life, a new person that would grow inside of her. It was all too much, Zatanna placed her face in her trembling hands, what was she going to do? Was she ready for this? Were they ready for this? Was it such a bad thing? Her breathing was shallow and it felt like she was drowning on dry land. Would she be a good mother? Zatanna could barely remember her own mother. What about her work, she had just joined the league. What would everyone think? What would Dick think? The timer on her watched beeped and Zatanna froze. Her five minutes were up. For what felt like several minutes Zatanna didn’t move. She couldn’t. She swallowed hard and purposefully stood up. With eyes closed Zatanna grasped the plastic stick and held it up. ‘One...two...three,’ she counted in her head before opening her eyes.

     A small + sign was all it took to bring the magician to her knees, tears already streaming down her cheeks. The pregnancy test clattered to the floor and Zatanna gently placed her hands against her stomach. She slumped back against the sink and sobbed quietly in both awe and fear. She was holding a new life, something that Dick and her had created. Something that magic could never do. She took deep breaths, greedily swallowing lungfuls of air as she sat there, her whole body shaking. 

           “Zee?” Dick called out, a smirk already playing in the corner of his mouth as he opened the door. Smoke filled his lungs and a loud high pitched ring assaulted his ears. His smirk fell,“Woah!” Dick rushed into the kitchen and opened the oven, removing the blackened chicken. “What happened?” he coughed, opening one of the windows and turning on the fan. As the fire alarm ceased, Dick wondered down the hallway, “Zatanna? What happened?” He spotted the bathroom door closed and knocked lightly, “Zee...? Zee are you in there?” Dick pressed his ear against the door, a few distorted sounds made their way through, “Zee come on,” his voiced dropped, full of confusion and worry, “Zee let me in, whatever’s wrong I can help, I-” Zatanna flung open the door and with such force latched on to her boyfriend, he almost fell over. “Zee...” he sighed, relieved, and wrapped his arms around her. Dick inhaled, burying his head in her hair and rubbed soothing circles into her back.

     Zatanna sobbed, tears soaking Dick’s shirt. There was so much she wanted to say, but she couldn’t. “Di-Dick,” she choked out, squeezing him tighter. 

     “Shhhhh Zee, it’s okay. You’re fine,” he murmured into her ear. She shook her head and pulled away, looking into his eyes. Zatanna tenderly grasped Dick’s hand and placed it against her stomach. He looked at her in confusion for a moment before his eyes caught the slim, white pregnancy test and the blue box on the bathroom floor behind her. His stomach dropped to the floor as he looked from Zatanna’s eyes to her stomach. 

     “I-I’m pregnant,” she whispered her sobs mixing with a laugh, “And the funny thing is, I’m terrified, but at the sametime, I already love him or her, I can’t explain it and I know this is unexpected and I’m not sure we’re ready and-” but Zatanna’s confession was cut short as Dick’s lips came crashing against her’s. 

     “Zee,” he said, tears in his own eyes, “I love you.” Dick paused and inhaled deeply, “And I’m scared too but,” he kneeled down so his head was level with Zatanna’s abdomen, “I also couldn’t be happier.” Dick placed another kiss just above her navel, before standing up straight and looking her in the eyes with a smile, “Looks like we’ll need to clear out the second bedroom.”

     Zatanna gave Dick a tired, but genuine smile wrapping her arms around his waist as he enveloped her in his own. “I was thinking yellow,” she remarked.

     Dick smiled, “Anything you want.” And for a moment they just stood there, holding each other, scared, and excited, and having no idea what was going to happen next, and knowing that it was okay not to know. Dick looked up and back towards the kitchen, a small smile dancing in the corners of his lips “...I guess we’re ordering in?”

     Zatanna’s eyes widened and her jaw dropped as she untangled herself from Dick and ran towards the kitchen. “Oh no,” she groaned, standing in front of the remains of what was supposed to be their dinner.

     Dick walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her midsection resting his head on her shoulder, “So...chinese?” he smirked into her neck as their laughter mixed together and filled the apartment, mingling with the radio, ‘...all i want for christmas is you...’