If you’ve offered any tarot readings to the general public in your life, you know this question well. “What does "X” think of me?“ "How does "Y” feel about me?“ "How does "Z” see me?“
It’s become a pretty polarized topic recently, with a lot of pushback from readers who don’t want to pry or don’t think it’s a productive question. For me - well, humans are weird and complicated. There’s all sorts of rules about what things mean (She touched her hair a lot, she’s totally into you…) and sometimes open communication is just weird and unproductive ("Hey bud, if you’re getting a crush on me, can you just … not?” “Um vain much I don’t even like you!”)… Point being, sometimes a bit of extra knowledge is appreciated before things get wierd, and I for one am totally ok with seeing if that extra knowledge is available!
The “prying into someone’s thoughts when they aren’t here” concern is definitely valid, but for me? I’m an empath. Thing get dumped on me all the time. I’ve gotten to a point where I can filter people’s public info from their private info when they are near me, to try to minimize that prying. The technique I’m going to share here is an extension of that - the cards themselves will filter public from private feelings of the party who isn’t present. If the third party is closed off in any way, all this reading will show is the energy of the relationship between them and the querent. If there is anything publicly accessible in their energy, this reading will pick up on that and allow it to be shared. I’ve described this before like facebook stalking a stranger - they have private posts, friends-only posts and public posts. This technique only picks up on the public posts. It fits within my moral code, but if it doesn’t yours, that’s cool. If it does, feel free to adopt it within your own practice!
With all that preamble done, lets get to business. The technique is basically a three card spread, with Court Cards and other chosen signifiers making the magic happen.
So, to start off, you’re going to pick yourself a couple of signifiers - a card to represent you, and a card to represent the other person. In my case, I’ve chosen The High Priestess & the King of Swords. This is actually just a mental choice though - leave the cards in the deck for now. These signifiers will basically be used as reference points and to add in a bit of depth later on.
Shuffle and lay out 3 cards.
The general gist of the technique is the first card represents you & your energy, the 2nd and 3rd potentially are the other party - but ONLY if a Court Card or personally chosen signifier for them shows up there. If no Courts/Signifiers show up in the 2nd or 3rd spots, you’re being told that you’re sticking your nose where it’s not wanted. Read the cards only as a “general energy of the relationship” spread and let it be. You can throw your chosen signifiers down on either side of the spread at this point if that helps you understand the interplay of the cards - just remember that even if you do, the thoughts and feelings of the other person STILL aren’t being shown directly. It’ll always be a “general energy of the relationship” reading when there are no courts in spot 2 or 3.
In my example here though, I got a Court!
In this case, the first card is showing you - if it’s a Court/Signifier, it’s how they see you (here’s where you can use the signifiers you chose - place the signifier for yourself behind the one that showed up. How does how you see yourself compare with how they see you?). If it’s not a Court/Signifier, it’s what they see you bringing to the table. In this example, the Court representing them is in the third spot. This shows how they see themselves in regards to the relationship (and again, you could dig out the signifier you chose for them to see how you see them compares to how they see themselves!) The middle card is their thoughts & feelings on what’s going on between the two of you.
The next thing that could happen is you get a Court or Signifier card in the 2nd slot, like above (I also threw in the original chosen signifiers to show how they intermingle). I find this layout ONLY shows up when there are hidden feelings that are very important for the querent to know about. The third card will show weight being carried by the third party, or where their energy is focussed if not in the relationship itself, or feelings about the relationship that they are having trouble expressing. IF another Court Card shows up here, there is someone else in the picture - it could be something like heavy parental expectations about their love life, it’s also shown up for other people the person could be interested in. I’ve even seen it representing their boss if they are super-invested in work and trying to impress someone for a raise. Keep those situations in mind - it isn’t always cheating! Oh and if it’s a minor, not a Court/Signifier in the first position, then just read it as their thoughts/feelings about the relationship, and not direct thoughts about the querent, basically…
And that really covers it - that’s a brief run down of my convoluted method of reading for third parties, while leaving room for my deck spirits to slam the door in my face if I’m not meant to pry! I’m hoping it’s clear enough, but feel free to ask if anything didn’t make sense! I was trying to not tl;dr while still being clear soooo yeah lol. If ya like the method, feel free to adopt it, if it’s still pushing boundaries for ya, that’s cool! Feel free to chat me up about your thoughts and experiences if you try this out!
