#taskmaster nz s2

[kiwitaskmaster]

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[kiwitaskmaster]

we’re SO back fr this time trust

Epsiode review! Taskmaster New Zealand Season 2, Epsiode 3:

As per usual: spoilers under the cut!

- All i’m hearing is jeremy wells is santa!

- ‘four of the greatest minds in comedy.. and matt heath :)’ jeremy never change keep bullying him (with ALL the love in the world)

- Guys jumper is FANtastic, huge fan

- as a brit i have absolutely zero room to judge this prize task

- NZ cushion made probably in aisa

- some non kiwi feijoa

- no idea who six60 is or why the cans are of any importance? the creations are cool though

- IVE GOT A GAR OF DIRT IVE GOT A JAR OF DIRT (or in this case, lunchbox)

- ‘i can’t wait to recieve the head at the end… and the statue’ LAURA.

- ‘have you ever seen movies’ ‘…yis?’ i forgot how much kiwi accents sounded

- i love this taskk

- the violinist from the titanic who.. somehow survived the titanic? sick.

- ‘fake tan sheets’ laura does NOT let him breathe LMAOO

- the wives move was very smart double those characters WOO

- the queen tipped it over

- i live david’s drink driving campaign x ‘it’ll frt you.. in jail.’ not might kill you but jail time shhdhdh

- Drink drive!…… Don’t do it.

- Oh Paul Williams is pregnant! shocker. (this feels like a regular occurrence..)

- potential incest arc in Urzila’s

- the fucking weed society matt heath i want to study your brain

- ‘Detective Reginald Bathgate, at your service’ is hysterical i love him

- ‘that’s a lot of effort to come second last.’ WHAT effort matt????

- OOHHH TEAM TASKKK

- david, laura and Guy meeting: YEAHHHHH

- also Urzila the second Matt walks in: oh noo…

- ‘Can we get any lubricant with this’ Matthew……………..

- ‘But the sexual energy grew over the challenges?’ ‘No. it didn’t.’

- prince andrew mention </3

- he ate 12 wheat biscuits 😭

- ‘i’m struggling to masticate’ what does that mean actually

- oooh matthew heath you little chester you

- niche ref but… leslie heath you CHEAT

- ifkyky (i’ve listened to old ahhh epsiodes of the (former) matt and jerry breakfast show)

- ‘they came out *12* try wheat biscuits.’

- i love when paul makes a joke and jeremy looks so mildly disappointed

- ‘i’ve got a prosthetic leg paul.’

- i don’t know how expensive scotch is but i am wondering about their scotch budget for this epsiode

- you can get a bottle for about 20 quid from tesco and uhhhh let’s GUESS a bottle per contestant so that’s like whatever 100 GBP is in nz currency

- ‘who’s scotch is this?’ ‘taskmasters.’ ‘i’m sorry.’ ‘it’s okay. he needs to cut back.’

- SEVEN shots hwidhdh

- yep knew uzila would pull the if you don’t like it your racist card LMAO

- the assassination …

- BALLSY??

- MATT WOO

- thank you for taking the rhod gilbert approach

- slept on attempt lowk, deserved more screen time, but it is quite funny that Jeremy doesn’t seem all that surprised makes you wonder if he’s pulled similar shit just for the love of the game

- i think some of those pigs were lacking tbh but whatever floats your boat jezza

- i love david running to give his coin to jeremy like an excited child i love him

- matt just says fuck it

- ‘mine was structurally not sound’ urzila you just snacked it against a table…. i fear

- david is always so excited i love him ajsjhs

[kiwitaskmaster]

We’re SO back!

Epsiode review of Taskmaster New Zealand, Season 2, Epsiode 2:

as per usual, spoilers!

- four comedians and one overachieving radio host <3

- ofc he’s (paul’s) a theatre kid.

- JEREMY WHY DO YOU DO THIS

- ‘you could play one of the nazis!’ STOP.

- big fan of this one (Laura’s prize task) because jeremy looks SO ‘oh.. okay :|’

- ‘she died of heat stroke’ ily laura

- apparently that’s not urzila’s actual nip

- my fav picture of matt and jeremy tbh 10/10 task but yeah not exactly hot ‘cute at best’ as guy puts it

- TOMATO IN THE MIDDLE OF A TOASTED SANDWHICH IS FUXKING GENIUS

- ‘Mine burns people! it’s so hot!!’ you should be happy with three. ‘thank you :}’

- ‘Don’t *follow* me’ ‘i wasn’t going to :(‘ LEAVE MY BOY ALONEE

- ‘i don’t have helium in my lungs.’

- ‘You hear that? That’s concerning.’

- ‘i was ready to give up at that point, I fell into a deep depression.’ ‘that was the first day’

- got a puregym ad while being IN a puregym

- i’m not slacking i promise

- i feel like health and safety was VERY lax here because wdym they let david clamber around the rafters LMAO

- something i would do tbh 10/10 approve

- matt your getting very bold here you have absolutely zero room to be arguing here babe

- ‘we didn’t have helium’ YOU DIDNT LOOK???

- return of the leaf blower!

- ‘that was *so* long laura! I’m *so* proud of you!’

- paul pole dancing part 2, strangely enough

- thank you angella, thank you urzila

- DJ ASSMASTER BOIIISS

- poor david 😭 1 point for a stitch up and half the time LMAO

- people booing jeremy is everything that’s so funny

- BULLY THAT TALL MAN

- laura switching tunes real quick there

- why they ALL decide to do the diluting right next to the tarp will always be a mystery to me

- ‘you know what they say paul.’ .. ‘fuck.’

- ‘it was better than matts’ that’s not very hard i’ll be honest

- if laura had used a sturdier mud i reckon she would of smashed it out the park

- still didn’t do too badly though considering

- ‘so far laura’s been the best squirter’

- drinking the sunscreen is BRAVE

- i would probably swallow a whole lot of it

- urzila is so iconic for just pelting it right there and then

- ‘sometimes the key is not fucking around.’

- this is a fun live task but i’d be so scared of fucking it up because i can NOT do art

- ‘she played goal defence for the auckland netball team’ ‘so she’s a lesbian?’

- ‘she hates me :|’

- these are some uh.. fantastic portraits!

- now i assume matt has seen jeremy’s mum and at the very least knows much more about her because they’ve been friends for like 20 years

- well done laura

[kiwitaskmaster]

TASKMASTER THE PODCAST TM NZ S2 E2 YIPPEEEE SHHDHDHD YIPPEEEE

[kiwitaskmaster]

Who's your favourite contestant on each of the NZ series?

Hi! Thank you so much for this question

Series 1: This is one of the easier series to pick a favourite I think, i’ll have to go for Angella Dravid, she’s got so many moments which really stand out to me (Paul and the tree, for example..) and kinda make her a clear winner, Guy/ Madeleine could be an option but I think angella does come just ahead for me anyway

Series 2: David Correos. I love everyone jn this cast equally but.. David. Could be Laura because I still laugh everytime I think about the ‘best stolen thing’ prize task but.. David. There’s a case to be made for every contestant in this one since i’ve watched it SO many times (Matt Heath.. ‘you’re coming last im gonna eat your ass.’ need i say more)

Series 3: Close close tie between Chris Parker and Josh Thomson methinks.. ‘Well Alright!!’ and ‘Scuse your fucking mouth??’ live rent free in my head but if i HAD to pick? Chris Parker

Series 4: I’ve only watched this one once since it’s harder to access (not on any streaming platform i own and i refuse to pay but i HAVE watched it) I remember liking Bubbah when i did watch it

Series 5: Similar situation w/ S4 but i do remember significantly more about it, Abby Howells. Even just purely for the ‘sketchiest place’ prize task dear lord that was fantastic work, real shame that Tofiga couldn’t be in the studio although i did enjoy seeing matt heath again

and you didn’t ask, but, this is how i’d rank them:

2, 5, 1, 3, 4

[kiwitaskmaster]

So.

you wanna guess?

that’s right! I FUCKING CALLED IT

[kiwitaskmaster]

Guy Montgomery's Guy Mont-Spelling Bee 2021 #1

Guy Montgomery's Guy Mont-Spelling Bee 2021 #1

Came across this gem of a video far too late at night.. i think the lack of sleep really added to it

[kiwitaskmaster]

we’re SO back

Taskmaster New Zealand, Season 2, Epsiode 1:

> ‘these four award winning comedians… and matt heath.’

> ‘walking roomba with a lovely singing voice’ <3

> sugar pocket!

> ‘This was pre all your sun beds jeremy’

> The.. sexy green m&m

> it’s a VERY fuckable chocolate

> Recycling bin! matt heath already bringing the side down.

> WEED!! (this would absolutely NOT be allowed on UK TV i’m astounded, but. fantastic.)

> one point for chloe </3

> Green screen was undermarked, how did the RECYCLING bin. beat EVERYTHING under the sun

> deserved 5 points for the weed

> LITTLE 14 YEAR OLD PAUL

> ‘so.. someone in my inner circle has betrayed me.’

> putting paul in DANGER in this task

> ‘Paul. you’re embarrassing me.’ *proceeds to throw the orange into the roof*

> LITTLE BABY PAULLLL

> when you’ve started saying ‘an eight of a turn to your left’ i think that’s a sign to swap tactics

> to be fair. the tactic worked so who am i to talk

> matt treating paul like a dog at the end of that task

> David and Laura choosing the least effective way possible

> impromptu driving lesson

> i just know paul was shitting himself he was going FAST at that fence

> wouldn’t say unassailable lead matt

> you’re ALLOWED into the water but. do you really want to?

> ‘technically not’ sewage does not fill me with confidence

> ‘it’s cos i’m a lesbian’ YEAHHH

> Idk if he thoight he was possibly be able to ride a bike while flapping his arms like that

> They both just jump into a shit filled pond.

> I’m pretty sure (maybe in one of the AUS series?) that they were told that it has e-coli in it

> he could of chose anywhere and he chose Nelson.

> ‘woow. woow. :|’

> ‘Id jump. and ideally i’d just keep going.’

> in all fairness that was fantastic like i’d believe that

> i fear you didn’t fly, you jumped into a shitty pond.

> First instinct would absolutely be to wear the sweets teeth as actual teeth i get you matt dw

> classic pool noodle for reach despite pool noodles not being very ridged

> ‘I could.. get really high-‘

> I feel like this isn’t the last time matt heath is gonna try dangle something off the balcony

> ‘Up looks less than along’

> brilliant work from david there

> didn’t need the contraption is you were gonna make someone else brush his teeth but tbf i think that way is significant less awkward

> forever a fan of this live task actually

> SO promising but they ALL fucking miss

> ii love them

> David’s yours isn’t a tower it’s a hill at best </3

> love you

> knowing me i’d accidentally throw my shoe at someone while trying to hit a tower

> ‘100% of the bastards will miss it’

> GOWANNN MATT HEATH WOO

> he got his bin back!