#tatsgato

[tatsgato]

been forever since i’ve been on here on my laptop and i wanted to at least update my age on my blog, but because i haven’t been on in forever, there’s an error message about my theme when i try to save and i have no idea what it means or when this change even happened lol

[tatsgato]

ClassicaLoid MUSIK Collection I - Hikarinoakariost

ClassicaLoid | Daisuke Hasegawa | Kana Hosizaki | Galaco | Yoko Ishida etc

Haven’t seen this in the tag yet, so i figured i’d add it! 

The site just put it up a little earlier today and i’ve already downloaded it and loving it so far. Can’t wait for Volume 2!

[tatsgato]

i miss talking to my friends but my life is so uneventful and somewhat depressing lately and has been for a few years now so i don’t really have much to say, and either way i always worry that i’m just bugging so i don’t initiate conversations anymore and they don’t initiate anything either so i’m worried that they don’t even see us as friends anymore :/ i wouldn’t even be surprised because i get that it’d be my fault for that if anything, but it is kinda sad to think about but i’m kinda scared to ask lol

tl;dr: i’ve been feeling lonely lol

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I had actually been meaning to write this sooner, but it’s been too hot for my laptop (and i’ve been too lazy to bring it out) and it’s annoying to type out stuff on my tablet so i just haven’t lol but I just kinda wanted to write a little explanation for my absence, i guess

(edit: ...I was questioning if i should add a tl;dr section on this kind of post but i checked and it’s really long... so tl;dr at the bottom!)

 I know i’m not like super prominent on this website and most people probably didn’t care or notice, but i just kinda accidentally took a break from social media for however many months it’s been. at first it really was by accident, since like i said it’s been too hot for my laptop and it’s annoying to tag things while on my tablet, so i was just saving everything to drafts, but now my drafts are really filling up... so i gotta deal with that later.

But after a while it was less because of that and more for personal reasons. We had found out that one of my aunts was really sick and had to go to the hospital, we then found out that she had cancer and only had a little while left to live. It struck us all pretty hard because out of all my mom’s sibling (5 of them) this aunt was all of our favorite, especially my mom’s. My mom was the youngest sibling and that aunt was the second eldest and out of all the stories my mom’s told of her childhood she was the only family member who had only good things said about her, she was like a second mom for my mom. 

We tried our best to keep in touch with her side of the family, since we moved a state up about 4 years ago now. we all really wanted to visit but it’s pretty expensive for 8/9 people to take that long of a trip, even just for 3 it’s hard to do for us nowadays, so we able to visit. But then we got the phone call that she had passed away, which hit my mom really hard, since they were so close and she passed on the day before my mom’s birthday in june, which she just didn’t even want to celebrate anymore.

the funeral was the next week,and since like i said it’s expensive for a trip that big, only 6 of us left, excluding me, my older sister, and our cousin. the rest of the family went down for about a week and we stayed to watch the house and pets.

I was personally okay with staying since i hardly talk to the rest of my family and i didn’t want to break down in front of any of them, i’ve never really experienced a death in the family and I knew it was gonna hit me hard, because my aunt was actually also my godmother, I was always very close to her when i was a kid but because of distance it was hard to see her even before we moved here, but i never stopped seeing her as an important person in my life. I didn’t cry right away when i found out like my mom did, or even really afterwards or since. I think it’s because i’ve been trying not to think about it too much, so i started distracting myself with other stuff like games or shows/movies/youtube. I really didn’t feel like typing anything out or tagging anything at that time, so i was just completely ignoring any type of social media, especially facebook since i’m friends with my cousin whose mom is that aunt and she was going through her own mourning and posting remembrances about her, which i’m not complaining about, but it was difficult for me to look at so i just decided to stay away. 

I still don’t think i’ve really properly mourned yet, but i’m tired of just staying in my little bubble, i want to interact with more people again and hopefully more that last time, though i do say that a lot and never really go through with it.

Idk I just wanna go back to at least a little before my break, even though i barely did things at that time anyway. so i wanted to explain a bit because i personally would feel awkward to just come back lol but yeah, that’s pretty much it, thanks if you actually took the time and read though all of this!

tl;dr: I started the “break” by accident due to laptop possibly overheating and lazyness, but it was later continued due to a slight(?) depression from a death in the family, my aunt who we were all very close with. It’s been a couple months now though and i’m tired of not interacting with people and want to talk to my friends/more people again. 

hope this was good enough, I’m not good with putting a name to my emotions or state of mind so excuse the variance in my explanations of how i was feeling please!

[tatsgato]

just wanted to say that i put a few stuff on queue on here. it’s not really anything big or important but

i just wanted to mention that it’s mostly gonna be from mystic messenger and space pirate captain harlot, because i played mm recently and also recently found that movie and loved both of them. so yeah, just a heads up i guess?

and i think i’m gonna set it to smaller intervals? because i usually only do huge intervals when i want to have a queue going for a while but i just want to clear it out and i don’t feel like keeping up with it lol

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got my Noir album in the mail today~

also got a poster since i pre-ordered from kpopmart and i’m weak to free shipping lol

gonna make a post for it tomorrow but if anyone wants to trade photocards please message me, i’m good with anyone else but preferably himchan or jongup?

[tatsgato]

i started playing mystic messenger about a week ago & i also picked amnesia: memories back up the other day to do the other routes on since i had only did 1 the 1st time around, so i’ve been distracted with both of those for the past few days and haven’t really done much internet things except listening to youtube in the background lol 

this post is pretty pointless tbh but i just wanted to explain my absence to anyone who cares lol which is pretty much that i’ve gotten stuck playing otome games most of the past few days...(do they both count for that? idek i’m tired)(also i’ve actually spent money on MM and i pretty much never like doing in-game transactions...)

also i feel like i already have a bad habit for using “lol” and MM is not helping, like at all...

[tatsgato]

i’ve been wanting a new watch because i haven’t had a working one in awhile & i recently had a birthday so i have the extra money. and i found this really pretty floral one that i kinda want but i don’t really have clothes to match with it lol, so i might just get a pocket watch, but i still also want a wrist watch...

I just wish i had enough money to start collecting watches lol