ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ sᴛᴜғғ : uh . theyre gay . all fluff ig . spoiler alert they kiss at the end but uhhh its nothing special really ..
This... was something Mayoi simply couldn't understand.
Everyone and everything had a way of making him anxious. That is... until he met Tatsumi.
Tatsumi had a way of reversing that effect. In fact, Mayoi even felt comfortable around him. That's something he would've never thought to be possible. But nevertheless, it was true. Just being in the same room, just looking into his eyes calmed his nerves, and it was something he could never explain.
It felt almost scary, knowing that things were changing in such a way. It felt scary knowing that he was actually starting to connect with someone. Yet, at the same time, it felt kind of nice, this change of pace.
Tatsumi being away in the hospital for his foot injury made Mayoi so anxious he felt he couldn't even eat. He just wanted to sit around and hope his friend would come back. That was weird, too. It felt weird being attached to someone for once, rather than wholly trying to distance himself.
Why did this boy make him feel so... different?
That was the question Mayoi pondered as he stared at the ceiling from his bunk. It was late, and everyone else was asleep. He couldn't sleep. His head wouldn't let him, because it was too busy being obnoxiously loud, constantly wondering what was up with Tatsumi.
Because the comfort wasn't the only difference, no, some things that blue-haired boy did even made his heart flutter. But he knew it just couldn't be love—because boys don't love each other, right? That was all he knew. He couldn't grasp any other part of this.
—
"Mayo?"
Mayoi jumped slightly and turned to look at the source of the voice coming from beside him. It, of course, was Tatsumi.
"Y-Yeah?" he responded.
"Oh... I didn't mean to freak you out. Sorry." Tatsumi gave a reassuring smile. "I was wondering how you were doing. You seem tired... and you've got some eyebags."
Mayoi couldn't help but smile a little. His blue-haired friend was always the first one to notice when something was off with him. He felt some strange feeling, deep in his chest, but couldn't place what exactly it was.
"Oh, yeah, uhm... I guess I could've slept better... but it's fine! It's fine." He replied, attempting a smile with similar reassurance.
"If you say so... but please, remember, you can always talk to me if you need to. Okay?"
"Um. Okay..."
He felt someone like him didn't deserve such kindness, but receiving it—from Tatsumi, at least—still made him feel a little better. Somehow.
"Okay!" A new voice suddenly interrupted. Both of them turned to see who it was. Aira, of course. He was the only one who could be so energetic this early, after all. "We've got some activities to do around ES today!"
"What have we got today?" Tatsumi wondered.
"Well..."
The conversation faded out as Mayoi looked off to the side, starting to get lost in thought again. He still couldn't grasp this... difference. What was it about that boy? What was that feeling in his chest? He had too many questions, and not a single one he could answer. Not now, at least. Maybe—
"Mayo!"
He jumped (again) as he snapped back to reality.
"Sorry! I spaced out! Uh..."
"It's alright... but did you hear anything I said?" Aira questioned with a slightly exasperated smile.
"Umm... no..."
He listened as Aira explained, for the second time, what they would be doing around ES today. He felt guilt pricking at his chest—why was he such a nuisance?
Tatsumi, noticing his friend's tension, put a gentle hand on his shoulder. He was surprised to see that his body relaxed nearly immediately.
—
They only had one outside activity, later that afternoon. Handing out flyers to advertise a Live. The four of them talked as they walked down the block.
"Mayo? You're sure you don't need an umbrella? The clouds are looking pretty dark..." Aira questioned.
"Yeah, I'll be fine..."
The truth was, he was worried about rain. He simply didn't want to be any more of a burden by causing them to turn back.
"Oh... okay. If you say so." he replied, and after a short pause, spoke again. "Wait. Do you think we could hand out more flyers if we split up? We could cover double the ground!"
"That's a good idea," Tatsumi replied, a slight smile forming. "Mayoi can come with me, and Hiiro can go with you. We can go to opposite blocks."
Mayoi felt a slight smile biting at the corners of his lips. He was gonna be alone with Tatsumi. He watched as him and Aira split the stack of flyers before parting ways. He trailed closely behind his activity-partner.
As they stopped in the spot they decided on, Mayoi felt the first few drops of rain. From the looks of it, it was gonna come down hard. Of course... just his luck. He let out a slight sigh.
He turned to see that Tatsumi was looking at him, with an expression of slight concern. After seemingly considering for a moment, he stepped close to Mayoi, so that his umbrella would cover both of them. They stood close enough that their shoulders were pressed together. There went his heart again, fluttering. What was that?
What he didn't notice—he had looked away after getting flustered—was that his friend had noted his reaction this time.
—
"Hey, Mayo?"
He didn't jump this time. He could recognize Tatsumi's voice anywhere.
"Yeah?"
He turned around with a slight smile.
"I have a feeling the sunset's gonna be really pretty tonight. Do you wanna come watch it with me?" Tatsumi asked. That feeling came back, practically stabbing at his chest.
"I'd love to!" Mayoi didn't even really perceive the excitement in his own voice.
—
Then, there they were, sitting on a bench outside of the ES building. Tatsumi was right; the sunset was more than gorgeous. The clouds from earlier remained, and the sun reflected perfectly off of them. The orange skies seemed to turn their world golden.
Mayoi felt an arm around his shoulders. He snapped back to reality and turned to look at the blue-haired boy, almost blushing.
"W-What are you doing, Tattsun...?" He wondered aloud. His chest felt tighter than ever. Yet... it wasn't his usual anxiety.
"Oh, do you not want me to...?"
"N-No, you can... you can... uhm... keep that there."
Tatsumi gave a slight smirk of amusement, now fully aware that he wasn't imagining this. He pulled him closer to himself, as if testing the waters.
Mayoi now felt like he was on the verge of a serious heart attack... and that was when it clicked. He wasn't overthinking. He was in denial. This is real. This is love.
But does a creature like him deserve a being as pure as Tatsumi? He felt nearly guilty for feeling the way he did. I'd only bring him down, he thought.
Yet again, he was pulled out of his anxious thoughts yet again by that boy's voice, that said voice speaking his name with a newfound type of gentleness. He turned to look into his soft purple eyes.
"Mayo. There's a reason I brought you out here, and you alone. I wanna tell you something."
"Uhm. Y-Yeah?"
"I love you... and based on how you've been acting..." He gave a quiet chuckle, not even bothering to finish the sentence. "I want this to be something, you know."
Mayoi gaped at him. He really couldn't believe it. Was he dreaming?
But... The guilt hit again.
"Tattsun... can we? We're... we're both..."
"Both boys. Yes. I don't think it should matter as much as people think. We're both boys... but we're both human, too. You know?"
They both went silent. I don't deserve him, not at all, no, I'm filth, he's pure, Mayoi thought.
Tatsumi interrupted his train of thought by taking him gently by the chin and bringing their eyes back together.
"Mayo. I know you don't think highly of yourself, and this will be hard to believe, but you're incredible to me. Maybe we haven't known each other all that long, but I still know this. I still know that if there's anyone I could be with, I want it to be you."
Tears pricked lightly at Mayoi's eyes. There were too many things to grapple with. He just came to terms with the fact he does, in fact, like boys... and now the man he loves is confessing to him. It all felt like a dream. Before he could say a thing, Tatsumi continued.
"If I'm right, and you do feel the same, please... don't let your image of yourself get in your way here. I'll say it again; I love you. We might be different, but that factor won't change. I can promise you that. So... what do you say? What do you feel, Mayo?"
"I..."
He took a deep breath, only vaguely aware of the tears starting to flow. Nobody had ever been this kind to him. He paused before deciding to let himself be selfish.
"I feel... I feel the same, I think... you're different to me, y-you know? You make me feel... different. I..."
He took a second breath, deeper now; he certainly felt he needed it. He hesitated. Could he really say this? Right now?
... Yes.
"I... I love you too, Tattsun."
There. This was truly happening now.
Tatsumi started to gently wipe the tears off of Mayoi's face with his thumb, before stopping to just... look into his eyes. Those bright blue eyes. He started to lean in, and with their lips only a couple inches away, he spoke.
"Mayo... do you mind?"
"No... I don't mind."
Then their lips were pressed together. Gently, Tatsumi treating his now-boyfriend as if he was fragile. Well... in a sense, yes, he was. They were apart a moment later, both boys smiling slight smiles. The sunset was over now, and thus came the vibrant, yet dark, blue skies that came between the sun setting and the moon rising.
Mayoi felt he could, in fact, live his life this way; live his life in love.
