It is Candlenights Eve, the night before the world's most inscrutable and modular wintertime holiday... probably. As everyone knows, Candlenights can shift and transform and expand and shrink of its own volition, making pinning down its beginning and end a tricky process. By your best guess, it is Candlenights Eve.
my favorite moments from the taz 50th live show in san diego tonight where they did balance for the first time in like four years:
SPOILERS BTW OBVIOUSLY
basic info:
setting was the grand opening of the brand new fantasy costco superstore managed by the one and only garfield the deals warlock. tres horny boys of course would be in attendance. any other info is too much to get into and i'm just gonna be vague but still try to make sense without perfect context.
now on to the best things:
-erika ishii as garfield the deals warlock
-let me say it again: ERIKA ISHII AS GARFIELD THE DEALS WARLOCK
-erika in general
-okay but fr erika is my ideal guest player bc they match the boys' freak so well. the chaos is THERE and i love it
-plot device of the show being clint mcelroy the planeswalking janitor busting in from another plane of existence and colliding with merle to accidentally create a destructive hair vortex powered by "clintergy", and the concept of "clintergy" as an all-powerful force that doesn't care about the rules of tres horny boys' world
-you could tell griffin was having so much fun with this one and also that it was a tiny tiny bit cathartic to make fun of his dad so much in front of a live audience lol
-also the immediate realization by everyone on stage that "clintergy" sounds more like "clitergy" unless you REALLY hit that N, which was gut-bustingly hilarious and drove a lot of jokes about finding the source of the mysterious energy, otherwise known as the "clintoris"
-Clint to be clear did NOT get this joke, and was very confused for several moments as everyone was dying until justin finally made him lean over and explained it in his ear, after which he immediately jumped all the way on board
-Magnus was this 🤏 close to losing the flaming raging poisoning sword of doom in a hot wings eating contest to garfield aka erika. justin buffed travis to help him cheat and then travis somehow thought it was unfair when erika also came up with a buff to try and cheat. travis rolled higher and did not lose the eating contest (or the sword) but everybody was on pins and needles for a minute. including travis
-garfield lore expanded with their patron being revealed as "Jimdavis", CEO of Fantasy Costco. Griffin pronounced this name as "JIM-dah-viss", which was incredible but also meant i needed to explain who he was referencing to my friend who i went with. hilarious choice griffin thank u thank u
-plot revolving around "clintergy" involving visits to three of clint's past characters to get them out of various pickles was so so funny and so great. i guessed where it was going during the first section and was so vindicated to be proven right
-travis doing actual leather working to make balance bracers for everyone and also to make his pauldrons and everything as magnus vs. justin going to spirit halloween right before the show and buying a pirate costume and a corpse bride wig was so descriptive of the various approaches that they have to their balance characters that it's truly magical
-erika as garfield when confronted with people questioning what they, magnus, taako and merle were doing there, immediately went with "you're on your own boys!!" and polymorphed into a regular cat to avoid the confrontation
-clint, bad at voices, rolling as merle to impersonate clint mcelroy the plane walking janitor's voice (a character who exists in the balance universe originally only as a joke to justify clint slipping out of merle's voice) in order to confuse the final boss, which griffin decided had the most "clintergy" of all time. griffin gave clint advantage. clint proceeded to roll a nat 20, confirming that indeed he has the most clintergy of all time. the cheer we all cheered was insane
-also the reveal mid show that justin had stolen the umbrella he had with him from their hotel. he proceeded to make a joke that the room was under paul's name so he was safe, only to later on during the show get a message that in fact they had been charged for the umbrella. to this of course his response was "how much was it because this is a shitty umbrella!!" and at the very end of the show during the bows this was the final slide:
