#tdloskkin

[fictionkinfessions]

All these horrible stories about the kin community has me feeling a lot better about not being very involved. I'm pretty introverted and have a few unpopular kins, so I typically don't interact much with other kins. I didn't think there were such shitty people in the community.

Thankfully, the two canonmates I'm friends with are great people. I didn't realize just how much I lucked out - Saiki Kusuke.

[fictionkinfessions]

Kin pet peeve: People referring to Kusuo as Saiki. I mean, it is his last name, and people in the source call him by it all the time. It's not weird or unusual or insulting... But as the other Saiki it annoys me a lot sometimes dhshshsjshdhdjsjaj.

Also I just really like his name. Kusuo. Why wouldn't you want to use it? It's the prettiest sound in the world - Saiki Kusuke.

[fictionkinfessions]

This shift makes me wish I was smarter. All of my life I've always been treated like I'm stupid, to the point that even as an adult my parents won't let me use the oven or an iron, much less teach me to drive, because apparently "I wouldn't be able to handle it". I want to be independent! I want to grow! I'm tired of being stifled and yet! Yet!

It just really sucks that I'm not the genius I was before. Back then, my parents respected my intelligence and they had faith that, at the very least, I'd be able to take care of myself. My parents in this life, though? Probably don't think I could ever live on my own.

And, to add insult to the injury, I also have a younger brother in this life who isn't treated like this!!! Hell, they say that he's brilliant. That he's talented and that they have big expectations for him. I hate it here - Saiki Kusuke.

[fictionkinfessions]

we're talking kin jobs? Kusuo working at the starbucks, what food crimes will they commit? (hint: it's dunking my chips in iced coffee) - Saiki Kusuo (#tiredpsychic👁💖)

r

[fictionkinfessions]

Happy Father's Day dad. I'm sorry I was so dismissive of you all the time, but I really do love you, even when you were incredibly annoying. -Saiki Kusou

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[fictionkinfessions]

Fun fact about my canon: Those flashbacks of my as a child with blonde hair? Pure bullshit. I was born with brown hair like dad. It's just that, once Kusuo was born with his cool and shiny pink hair, I felt sort of boring. Like, I was born a prodigy, but he was so special that the universe decided to mark him as important with his cute colored hair? What the hell?

Anyway, I had a breakdown in the bathroom when I was like eight after a particularly rough loss and just made DIY hair bleach to look better. It didn't turn out perfect because I did it in a rush and didn't have the necessary products so it turned out a dirty blonde instead of a more white-ish color, but I decided to just go with it. I made a promise to myself that I'll make it look better once I earned it by defeating Kusuo.

...That never happened. So I continued to bleach it badly on purpose as a mark of being a failure. And then being a failure just became part of my identity, so I stopped planning on ever changing it. So yeah, that's... A lot to unpack. Thanks, memories - Saiki Kusuke.

[fictionkinfessions]

Me: -kins Saiki Kusuke, an incredible genius that advanced the field of science out of boredom-

Also me: -mispells the word truck four times while trying to find the song Two Trucks-

[fictionkinfessions]

I'm not usually too bothered by the fandom's incessant need to constantly point out I'm the worst character and that I should eat glass (because yeah mood) but today I found a post on Instagram saying I shouldn't be shipped with Kusuo and I... Got way too defensive about it.

Like, I know my obsession with him was creepy and unhealthy. I know he oftentimes brought out the worst in me. And I know full well that he's my brother. But I just. I wasn't anything without Kusuo. I don't remember what my life was like before I made it about him. Everything I ever did or thought always came back to him. He was the person I admired the most, and the only one who pushed me to continue getting better at anything I did. I can't say it was a good life, but that was my life, and I can't say I don't miss it to an extent. It's impossible for me to be in this shift and not acknowledge the person who most impacted me back then.

Obviously I don't expect others to understand. I don't even understand why I'm like this even after all this time. I just... I don't know. I don't know - Saiki Kusuke.