#tea leoni

[metropolicinema]

[inmediaslex]

Have you ever watched Jurassic Park and said “Damn this is the best movie ever made, but what if the first half of it was Knives Out and the raptors were pissed off ten foot tall unicorns?”

No?

You haven’t?

Yeah there’s exactly one motherfucker on the planet who did that and it lived rent free in his brain until he decided to make a whole ass movie about it. Grabbed Ant Man to lend his heart and humor and found our most prominent new-on-deck actress Miss Jenna Ortega to be the center. Pulled in Richard E Grant because what’s one of these without a prominent venerable elder (see Richard Attenborough in Jurassic Park and Christopher Plummer in Knives Out) and why not grab a smarmy ass Will Poulter to be equal parts comic relief and idiot villain like he does best? And let’s round this out with Tea Leoni since she’s been chased by monsters before and is great at being unforgivably white and rich. Then he put them in that one house you look at and go “I hate the people who live here” and make them do The Mist but the creatures outside are, as I said, pissed off ten foot tall Unicorns.

This is Death of a Unicorn.

THIS MOVIE FUCKS.

Look. It’s a bit predictable. The unicorns aren’t the best effect. I get it. It’s not a technical masterpiece. But fuck if I didn’t have the time of my life with this. The comedy, while a bit heavy handed on the “fuck rich people” spectrum, is actually just a bit below Knives Out levels of solid and there were a few genuine loud laughs from my audience throughout. The Unicorns are intimidating as hell especially when we’re doing the Jaws approach, but even when they’re in full light doing terrible things, it’s a lot of fun to watch. Hard R carnage but they’re goddamn *Unicorns.*

It’s a winning premise executed with the right level of knowing stupidity and is probably my favorite thing this year so far. Alex Scharfman, I’m sure people said “that’s dumb and your idea will never get anywhere.” Thank you for following your dreams anyway. I’m excited for what fun he has for us next.

[samanthasawyer1]

[yourlittleliferaft]

Téa and Tim!!! 🥰😍

https://people.com/stars-of-nbc-peacock-bravo-more-unite-at-upfront-exclusive-photos-11972191

[evergreenxbess]

Tim and Téa are seen arriving to the NBC Upfront at Radio City Music Hall♥️🤩

May 11, 2026, New York City

[xxhorace]

Tea Leoni

[squatwaif]

[acerimmer41]

Téa Leoni