You see my face, you see my grin
You see the state that I am in
‘This man’s straight from the looney bin’
I don’t suppose you’re wrong.
I wait here every Tuesday night
Urban decay, a ghastly sight,
Cadaver stiff amongst the blight
My ride will be here soon.
I have a dream, of up on stage
I’ll hold the mic and be assuage.
A jester of this modern age-
I can hear their applause.
One booking surely grows to two,
Comedic date-night rendezvous,
No way for you to misconstrue:
That I’ll be somebody.
Time ticks away to quarter past-
Don’t know how long my wait will last.
Skin-crawling dread leaves me aghast.
They’re squirming from within.
I feel the teeth, I feel the bites–
My coat is filled with parasites.
They bubble forth as fear ignites.
Do you hear them whisper?
“They won’t laugh; you’re awfully daff.”
“They’ll scoff.”
“They'll leave.”
“All you’ve done is underachieve.”
“They’ve come to mock; your work’s a crock.”
“You’ll drag.”
“You'll bomb.”
“They’ll recognize you lack aplomb.”
“She was right, you troglodyte–”
“Don’t care.”
“Never did.”
“You can’t keep it underlid–”
“Freak–”
“Weak–”
“I must critique–”
“Who said you had the right to speak?”
“Quack–”
“Whack–”
“Right off-the-rack–”
“Why are you feeling so attacked?”
Tongues leave burns, at every turn–
Voices can’t be discerned–
They chew, they bite, they rip, they gnaw–
Ribcage etched into scrimshaw.
They stab, they pierce, they leech, they drain–
They coil and squeeze just like a chain!
Just grin, just grin, just grin and bear–
If I was gone they wouldn’t stare…
A screech, a huff: noise impedes–
Savior arrives at leisure speeds.
Gates ajar, ferryman proceeds:
“You coming on, or what?”
I suck in bile; adjust my coat.
I tighten my smile; clear my throat–
Must not look like I’m inchoate–
The clown’s back on the clock.