Feb 8, 2015
(603): Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
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(603): Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
(850): There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
(516): I am not a stalker…i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
(562): If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
(914): Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
(504): All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
(248): That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news