#the duchess

[zartha]

Keira Knightley as Georgiana Cavendish, Duchess of Devonshire THE DUCHESS (2008) dir.: Saul Dibb

[cbedfordart]

See we know that The Duchess likes horses, but how would they feel about My Little Pony? Would they like it? Would they have a favorite?

Duchess is more of a Star Fillies appreciator.

I think they would like the old style my little ponies

... but also. Look what I jsut found out about

lmao what is going on here. It's cute tho.

[zartha]

Keira Knightley as Georgiana Cavendish, Duchess of Devonshire THE DUCHESS (2008) dir.: Saul Dibb

[princessnamora]

Keira Knightley as Georgiana Cavendish in The Duchess (2008)

[scarficent]

Keira Knightley na estreia mundial de A Duquesa.

↪ psd por @dewinniepsd + action por @harupsds de @crowngraphic © curta ou reblog se você gostou ou salvou.

[avaford2009]

Horrid Henry: A Twisted Tale

Aerobic Al in Wonderland

What if Aerobic Al fell down the rabbit hole and discovered Wonderland?

Chapter Four: The Duchess and the Baby of Pig and Pepper

Aerobic Al left Tweedledum and Tweedledee still arguing over who was worse, the Walrus or the Carpenter. He jogged along a narrow path until he stumbled upon an utterly bizarre little cottage. The chimney was shaped like a massive runner's water bottle, and the roof was thatched with what looked like oversized yoga mats.

Before he could even knock, a huge plate came flying out of an open window, shattering right at his feet.

"Oi! Watch the shins, mate!" Al yelled, jumping back with an impressive vertical hop.

Curiosity getting the better of his training schedule, he pushed the front door open and stepped inside. He was instantly hit by a thick, suffocating cloud of grey smoke that smelled intensely of black pepper. Al coughed violently, his eyes watering. "Bostin' heck... this air quality is an absolute nightmare for the lungs!"

In the middle of the kitchen, sitting on a three-legged stool, was the Duchess. She was a deeply intimidating woman with an enormous, fierce face and a sharp, pointed chin. She was cradling a small, wrapped bundle—a baby—that was howling at the top of its lungs.

Near the hearth stood the Cook, a frantic woman who was leaning over a massive iron cauldron of soup. She was dumping handfuls of pepper into the pot from a giant shaker, completely ignoring the fact that everyone in the room was sneezing uncontrollably.

Except for one creature. Sitting on the hearth, grinning from ear to ear, was a massive ginger cat.

"Excuse me, missus," Al wheezed, wiping his nose with his sleeve. "Could you maybe hold back on the seasoning? It’s completely ruining my aerobic capacity. And why is your cat smiling like that?"

"It’s a Cheshire Cat," the Duchess snapped, formatting her words into a harsh growl. "And that's why. Pig!"

Al blinked, slightly offended. "Hey, there's no need for name-calling. I’m just trying to promote a healthy breathing environment."

The Duchess paid him no attention whatsoever. Instead, she began tossing the wailing baby violently up and down in her arms, treating the poor infant like a heavy medicine ball. She began to roar a truly dreadful lullaby, shaking the baby hard at the end of every line:

"Speak roughly to your little boy, And beat him when he sneezes: He only does it to annoy, Because he knows it teases!" [1, 2]

The Cook joined in the chorus, punctuated by throwing a barrage of frying pans, saucepans, and rolling pins directly at the Duchess and the child. Al had to execute a rapid series of burpees and side-steps just to avoid getting hit by a flying teakettle. [1]

"Chorus!" the Duchess screamed, ignoring the metal clanging around her:

"Wow! wow! wow!"

"Right, that’s it! Give over!" Al shouted, stepping forward with his whistle in hand. "This is a massive safety hazard! That is proper foul play!"

"Here! You may nurse it a bit, if you like!" the Duchess yelled, completely losing patience. She flung the baby directly at Al’s chest. "I must go and get ready to play croquet with the Queen!"

Al’s athletic reflexes kicked in. He dove across the kitchen floor, catching the bundle securely in both arms just before it hit the hard ground. By the time he stood up and brushed the soot off his tracksuit, the Duchess and the Cook had completely vanished out the back door.

Al carried the crying bundle out into the fresh air of the forest, immensely relieved to get his lungs away from the pepper smoke. The baby was a remarkably queer shape, with its legs and arms curled up like a tight ball. It kept grunting and snorting in a highly un-human fashion.

"Come on then, little mate," Al said softly, walking at a gentle pace. "Let's get you some proper fresh air. A nice, brisk walk will do you wonders."

The baby grunted again. Al pulled back the edge of the blanket to check on it, only to stop dead in his tracks.

The child’s nose had completely turned up, resembling a flat, pink snout. Its eyes had grown exceptionally small for a baby, and its ears were turning distinctly pointed and hairy. Al set the creature down on the grass, backing away slowly.

With a joyful oink, the bundle unrolled itself entirely. It was no longer a human baby at all. It was a small, round, pink piglet. It shook its curly tail, turned around, and trotted happily off into the thick bushes, completely content with its new life in the wild.

Al watched it go, shaking his head in absolute bewilderment as he adjusted his red-and-yellow cap. "Well," Al muttered to himself, "as a baby, it was a completely dreadful child. But as a pig, it’s got a proper good sprint on it, innit."

[baixiaooo]

Winter clothing❄️❄️