Rory and Amy's relationship with each other and the Doctor is and was my favorite of the ENTIRE Doctor Who Series. Rory is what makes the WHOLE thing amazing and here is why.
When you first meet Rory aka Stupid Face he has that Goofy look on his face and when introduced he is introduced as Amy's friend (which is fucked up) but it sets the stage for how we are supposed to view Rory.
We are to view him as weak, scared, and possibly whipped.
He is the friend, the boyfriend, the last centurion, an Auton that shot Amy, he died multiple times as well.
What you don't really stop to think about until S6 E5: The Rebel Flesh is that he remembers ALL of that. Every bit of it. Big Bang 2 may have restored him human but as Doctor Matt Smith says about all the disasters they deal with they are in the eye of it all so they aren't effected like other and they are effected last if things are to change.
So in S6 E5: The Rebel Flesh he finds him self being very protective of a clone of a woman named Jennifer who feels and has EVERY single memory that the original copy has.
It wasn't until this episode that I REALLY felt sad for Rory to a HIGH degree but I fell in love with him even more because I mean damn he waited 2000 years for Amy while she was in the Pandorica. Keeping her safe!
I barely made it through 2020!! This man (Auton) WAITED all that time.
Rory, Matt Smith may be my 2nd fav Doctor but you sir, YOU are my #1 favorite person!
Here is a link if you want to read a little more about Rory Williams
Rory Arthur Williams was a human nurse and companion of the Eleventh Doctor. He was Amy Pond's husband. He began travelling with the Doctor
PROMPT: Phil is a famous musician, but only in the emo community. Dan wins backstage passes. Fluff or possible smut ensues. Comments: I really like emotional!dan and comforting!phil but you don’t have to include it. Anything you write, I’m sure I’ll love
Words: 6008
Triggers: Unhappy home life, homelessness, bullying
Type: Angst, Comfort, Fluff
Summary: Daniel Howell is a lonely boy from an unloving family. He finds comfort only in the music of his hero, Phil Lester. Phil is the most popular Emo performer in the US, UK and Canada, and his home life had been no easier than Dan’s. A chance meeting brings them together and Phil befriends the younger boy, inspiring him both creatively and personally. Over time, this friendship develops into something more: something that may just fill the deep sadness each has in their hearts.
Daniel Howell stood in awe before a poster of his personal hero, Phil Lester. The contrast between the two could not have been any vaster. The tan, brown haired, chocolate eyed boy stared at the picture of the pale, raven-haired young man with the striking blue-green eyes and felt a stirring in his soul. He wanted to be like him. He wanted his life to be more like Phil’s life. Or rather, he wanted his life to be what he imagined Phil’s life to be like, for the two had never met. Dan imagined Phil as having deep connections with more friends than he could count. He pictured parties, late night talks and inside jokes with people who cared about him and that he could trust; he pictured all the things he did not have.
Dan Howell was a very lonely young man. At 18 years of age, he had three MySpace “friends”, who in real life were no more than just acquaintances. Unless they were teasing him, his classmates kept their distance. His parents were distant as well and, although they provided the essentials of food, shelter and clothing, they did not provide love or comfort, the two things that Dan needed the most.
Try as hard as he might, Dan never fit in with the cool crowd. He felt like he was an “Emo” kid, and he certainly dressed the part, but even though he thought the darkness in his soul matched his wardrobe, no one else in the Emo crowd agreed. To them, he was a privileged upper-middle class boy with stunningly good looks, naturally wavy hair and clear skin. Even his close acquaintances mocked him for his good fortune. When he reached out in times of pain, which were frequent, they scoffed. How could this golden child possibly be suffering in the way that they were? They decided that he couldn’t, and so they never supported him, even when he was in desperate need of help.
Dan was, truly, alone in the world; except, of course, for the one person who he trusted and identified with the most: Phil Lester. When he listened to Phil’s songs, it was as if Phil was reading out a letter that Dan could have written. The music matched his moods and the lyrics reflected the pain in his soul. Oftentimes, he would turn up the volume to the point his ears started to hurt, shut off the lights, close his eyes, and listen to the same four songs over and over until he felt the wall of pain inside him break. Usually, this would lead to tears, but no one ever saw them and Dan didn’t care. He just needed to feel better. And with Phil Lester, he felt better, even if just for a brief moment.
The poster that Dan was staring at announced that Phil Lester, lead singer of LesterBloom, was coming to Dan’s town in a week’s time to perform songs from their number one album, “Heart Bleed”. LesterBloom was the top Emo band in the UK, US and Canada, and Dan never dreamed they would come to his small town. He never thought he would be so lucky as to have the chance to be in the same room as his personal hero.
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“I want to be like him,” Dan thought as drops of rain began to fall from the dim autumnal sky above. He subtly pulled his fringe down a bit farther to partially cover one of his chestnut brown colored eyes. He was wearing his favorite outfit: zippered black jacket, plain black t-shirt, zippered black jeans, black socks and black zipped shoes.
From behind the clouds, the late afternoon sun struggled to illuminate the cobbled pavement where Dan stood in line to buy his ticket to LesterBloom. He was spending all the money he had, but the money was nothing to him in comparison to the hope and excitement he was feeling inside. He could not believe he was actually going to see his hero, his near-savior, Phil Lester, in person. Hero-worship took a hold of Dan as he thought about how he’d be in the same room, breathing the same air, and hearing Phil sing the lyrics that had helped him keep his heart from completely breaking.
“Move, idiot,” snapped the kid behind him in line. Dan had been staring off into space again, a habit that revealed itself all too often in public situations.
“Sorry,” he said softly, as he shuffled forward towards the window.
His heart was racing as he approached it. To him, this was literally a life changing moment: he was about to make his first physical connection to Phil Lester, even if that connection was just the acquisition of a ticket.
“One, please” said Dan, and the young woman at the counter gave him a quick once over, then a clearly dismissive look, took his money and handed him the ticket with a face filled with thinly veiled disgust.
“Poser”, he heard her say under her breath as he walked away from the window. But he didn’t care. Not now. Not when he held the ticket to his future in his hands.
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Phil Lester was the hottest thing in Emo music. No one ever thought of him as a poser. His back story was filled with heart breaking tragedy and hard work. He had started off in the North of Manchester as the second child of a poor family who loved him, but couldn’t afford to support him. When he turned 14, to ease the burden on his family, he left home and started sleeping wherever he could: typically libraries, fast food restrooms, and back rooms at the record shops where his friends worked. When he couldn’t find a place to sleep, he simply rested his head in the woods with nothing but the sky for a blanket. Some days, he even went without food.
Then, one fateful day, while playing guitar and singing for change next to a convenience store, a 16 year old kid sat down next to him. The kid just listened, saying nothing. After 4 songs, the kid, named Rob, spoke up. “You’re really good, man. You should totally open for my band. We’re playing at the Rec Center tomorrow. You cool with that? I can’t pay you, but you can hang out and eat with us after if you want”. Phil jumped at the opportunity–not only to perform but also to get a good meal–and immediately agreed to open the show.
The show went well and Phil got a good, if modest, reception from the meager- sized crowd. The band he opened for liked his gritty, passionate lyrics and asked him if he wanted to open for them the next weekend. He accepted, and soon, word started to spread about this quiet kid with the dark past and edgy lyrics.
In a few months, more people were showing up to see Phil open than to see the main band. Wisely, they invited him to become the lead singer and started incorporating his songs into their set-list. After 2 years of working their way up through the ranks, LesterBloom was born. The first single from their first album, “Quietly Loud” was also their first number one best seller around the world.
Phil’s lifestyle changed dramatically with their success, but his personality never varied a millimeter. He sent money back to his family and they no longer lived in poverty. He remained a kind, thoughtful young man who took the time to meet his fans after each and every show and to sign autographs until the early hours of the morning. The music industry was taking notice of Phil and the reviews were glowing.
Tragedy struck, as it typically does, out of nowhere, when Phil’s best friend and band mate, Rob, was killed when their tour bus rolled over on the highway. Phil and the rest of the band were devastated, and for a while, it seemed that LesterBloom might be disbanded due to grief. However, they pulled themselves together, mostly from the support and spirit of Phil, and they soldiered on, gradually returning to shows. Phil took on more and more responsibilities in the group, letting the others simply rehearse and perform, and slowly they began to heal. All the while, Phil was writing, and a year later, their best selling album to date, “Heart Bleed”, was released and dedicated to Rob.
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“Heart Bleed” was Dan’s favorite album of all time. The lead song was raw with the emotions of loss and pain, and “Raining Inside” the second single, seemed to describe his life perfectly.
When nighttime finds you home
Are you alright to spend a night of being all alone
Or do you hide between the lines of conversations past
A wall of words
A heart unheard
That hides behind the mask
The lyrics touched his soul. No one understood his pain like Phil Lester did. No one else knew his loneliness.
At school, he sketched pictures of Phil in his notebook and copied the lyrics of his favorite “Heart Bleed” songs over and over. His MySpace was a shrine to Phil, with “Raining Inside” playing on a constant loop. He saved up and bought black and blue eyeliner and started wearing his eyes like Phil did, though the effect on his soft brown eyes was not as striking.
As the day of the concert approached, Dan touched up the Phil shrine in his bedroom, re-arranging the cut out magazine photos hung on the wall and re-positioning his CDs along the shelf beneath. He blogged about the upcoming show on his MySpace, but none of his three “friends” answered back. Of course, everyone at school was talking of nothing but the upcoming show, but when Dan tried to interject his own excitement into a conversation with his acquaintances, they responded only with mocking laughter.
“You? You’re going to the LesterBloom concert? They won’t let you in, you poser, haha!”
“Dan thinks he’s going to see LesterBloom! OMG that’s hilarious.”
Dan bit his bottom lip, tucked his hands into his pockets, and walked away, head down. He was going to see Phil Lester and that was that. Then these guys would see that he was no poser. He was real.
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The night of the show, Dan dressed up in his blackest-black outfit and heavily applied the black eyeliner under both eyes. He walked right past his indifferent parents and out the front door.
He walked downtown by himself, his footsteps echoing against the walls of the old city buildings in the darkness. It was 9:30 pm and it was all he could do to keep his pace regular. The excitement had built up inside of him so much that he wanted to burst into a run. Phil Lester was in his town! But he knew better than to show that kind of emotion and he didn’t want to get there too early. It was already going to be awkward seeing his friends there. If he timed it right, he’d get there just as the opening act began and he wouldn’t have to talk to anyone.
In fact, he did time it well, and the lights were going down in the auditorium just as he walked in. “Hateful”, a local emo-punk band, came out with a roar from the crowd and started right in with their best song, “You Don’t Know”.
You don’t know
What I feel
You don’t know
My pain is real
Dan sang along softly, keeping his eyes looking straight ahead and trying to blend in with the crowd.
He was at the very back of the room and was planning how he could get closer to the stage when something sharp and painful hit his shoulder.
“Oh, sorry” yelled the young man who had run into him.
“It’s okay” Dan yelled back, turning to look straight into the blue eyes of Phil Lester.
——————————————————————————————————————————-
“I always watch the opening act from the back. Well, at least their first few songs. It helps me get an idea of what the crowd is like,” said Phil, who was applying a cold cloth to Dan’s gashed shoulder backstage, “Steve here is sorry he cut your arm with the mic stand. He was sneaking it in because he’s the worst crew member ever and forgot it in the truck, haha.”
“It’s alright,” Dan said in a monotone voice, completely unable to think of anything else to say. And for a moment, there was an awkward silence and Dan could feel every second of it like tiny daggers to his soul.
“So, what’s your name?” Phil asked.
“Dan,” he replied, not entirely sure if this was the correct answer. His heart was racing in his chest and he could hear his pulse in his ears. He kept his hands in his pockets so Phil wouldn’t see them shaking.
“Listen, Dan, I’ve got to go on in a few minutes, but I want to make sure you’re okay. Do you want to hang out with the crew and watch the show from the side of the stage? That way I can keep an eye on you and then we can talk a bit after the show.”
“Yeah, okay, sure” answered Dan, stunned.
“Great! Enjoy the show!” said Phil, who patted Dan on his other shoulder and walked away towards the stage.
The stage manager got a bandage from the first aid kit and applied it to Dan’s left shoulder, which by this time had stopped bleeding.
“Come with me, kid” he said to Dan, and he led him to the side of the stage where Phil and LesterBloom were standing and waiting to go on while the opening act finished their final number.
Dan stared at Phil as if he was watching a movie. He barely even blinked so as not to miss anything. Phil jumped up and down a bit to work out some nerves, gave all his band mates a friendly punch in the arm, and ran out onto the black stage, which immediately lit up with purple, orange, green and blue lights all around one white spot light that shone directly on Phil. Dan was blown away by the roar of the audience.
Phil and the band went right into “Heart Bleed”, an uptempo tear-jerker, and Dan, who by this time was completely overwhelmed, began to cry. He felt the tears well up in his eyes as he sung along and he made casual gestures to wipe them away without anyone seeing. He needn’t have worried, as no one was looking at him. Everyone was enraptured by the performance going on in front of them. Phil Lester was ripping out their hearts, and the entire audience loved it.
By the fifth song, Dan was moshing all by himself on the side of the stage, lost in the heart tearing words and the sick beats. He was mesmerized by Phil’s electric and charismatic performance, and the connection he felt with the young man with the tragic history was stronger than he had ever felt before. He had been touched by Phil Lester! And Phil Lester was going to talk to him after the show! Even though he had no one to share this moment with, and even though the loneliness still ate him away, he felt something else that he hadn’t felt in a long time. He felt happy.
——————————————————————————————————————————
The finale was “Raining Inside”, a heavily-beated, deeply emotional song about the loss of Rob. There was not a dry eye in the house and Dan had long ago stopped trying to hold back his tears. Phil sang:
Sometimes we’re raining on the inside
Our hearts well up with tears and start to pour…
The entire crowd was singing and Dan was totally beside himself with emotions. He was in pain, and yet it was the good kind of pain. Someone understood him. And that someone was 15 feet away.
After the show, there was chaos. Dan was swept to the side as security pulled Phil and the band past him and into the backstage area. The lights came on and the the venue started to empty out. Even through the buzzing in his ears, Dan could hear the sounds of the crowd getting softer and farther away. The crew started breaking down the set as the lights came up, and Dan stood on the side-stage for about 10 minutes. Fear crept up in his throat as he worried that he had been forgotten. He told himself that he should have known this would happen. Of all the people in the world, he wouldn’t be lucky enough to get to talk to Phil Lester again. He felt the tears begin to well up and sting his eyes. As the muffled sounds of the crowd faded into silence, he decided no one was coming for him; it had been fifteen minutes now. By the time he turned and shuffled towards the exit door with his head down, his eyes were so filled with tears that he could barely see where he was going.
“Hey, Dan?!” yelled Phil. “Dan?!”
Dan spun around to see Phil back on the side of the stage, calling for him.
“Yes, I’m here!” Dan replied as he jogged back up to the stage.
“Dan! I couldn’t find you backstage and I thought…hey, are you crying?”
Dan wiped his eyes, ‘NO, no, just yawning. I was tired and….yeah. Just yawning.”
Phil walked up to Dan and put his hands on his shoulders, “Dan, are you okay?”
“No,” he heard himself say, and then he started to sob.
—————————————————————————————————————————-
Dan was sitting in the tour bus, on a soft booth seat, with Phil Lester himself sitting catty-corner to him.
“It’s just that,” Dan sniffed, “I don’t have any friends and I’m so lonely. It hurts.”
Phil looked at the young man, then down at the floor. He knew the pain of loneliness very well and he empathized deeply with Dan.
“And,” Dan rambled on, “my family doesn’t care about me and everyone thinks I’m a poser and no one wants me and I’ll never find a boyfriend and I’m going to be alone forever!”
“Wow,” said Phil, scooting closer and wrapping his arm around Dan’s shoulders. “That’s a lot of worries for one person to have. I don’t know you very well yet, but I do know that you aren’t a poser. You have deep emotions and I bet your writing is amazing.”
“How…how did you know I write poetry?” asked Dan, astonished.
Phil smiled, “I can hear your talent in the way that you talk, Dan. You aren’t shallow. You are creative and the people in your school are really missing out on something special if they aren’t friends with you yet.”
Phil handed Dan a Kleenex and the younger boy dabbed his eyes and blew his nose.
“I’m sorry I’m rambling on about this when I just met you. It’s just that, well, no one has ever really listened to me before,” Dan apologized. “I’ve never really had anyone to talk to and I feel like I can talk to you, you know?”
“Hey Steve, can you grab Dan here a bottle of water?” asked Phil, and Steve soon returned with a chilled bottle. Dan drank it greedily and it felt good on his parched throat.
“Where do you do your writing?” asked Phil with a kind smile.
“Mostly in my notebooks. I put a few on my MySpace but no one liked them.”
“May I read them?” asked Phil, gently.
“Um, you want to read them?!” Dan asked back, incredulously.
“Of course I do! I love reading what talented people write!” Phil answered.
Phil pulled out his laptop, a machine that Dan had only seen in movies, and hooked it up to the wired line that the venue had provided. In a few minutes, they were looking at Dan’s MySpace.
Phil examined it carefully, taking the time to compliment the design and even the font choices. He thanked him for playing his song on repeat and talked to him a little about the pain he had gone through while writing it.
“Where are your poems?” Phil asked eagerly, as he scrolled, “Oh, there, there I see them.”
And suddenly Phil Lester was reading Dan’s poems. Aloud. To Dan.
Dan wasn’t sure what to do with himself. He had a silly grin on his face and he kept playing with the water bottle, but the whole time he kept his eyes on Phil’s face, looking for any signs of disapproval or disappointment. He found none.
When he finished reading, he said, “Dan, these are wonderful! I could make a song out of these two here,” he said pointing, “The first could be divided into three verses and the second could be the chorus. I mean, these are just great, really great!”
“Thank you,” said Dan, stunned and in awe. “That really means a lot. I mean, coming from you. I mean, your writing is so…. good and I just love it and it just seems like you write the way I think and feel and no one else knows how I feel, you know? I mean, I just wish I could write like you do.”
“I love it, Dan. You promise me that you’ll keep writing, okay?”
“I promise” said Dan.
“And hey,” said Phil, who had noticed the distinct lack of MySpace friends but didn’t want to bring it up in a negative way, “I’d like to ask you a favor. I’d like to keep in touch and keep reading what you write. I think the easiest way to do that would be to be MySpace friends. Will you add me and I’ll add you back?”
Dan’s jaw opened but no words came out.
Phil just smiled, his striking blue eyes looking into Dan’s with a care and compassion that Dan had never felt before.
“Yes, sure, of course, I mean, Yes, of course,” stammered Dan.
And with a few clicks, they were MySpace friends.
“You know, Dan, I think we’re about the same age. You’re 18, right?”
“Yeah,” answered Dan.
“It can be really hard to deal with life when you don’t have any support from your parents or friends. Especially at our age, you know? But I believe in you,” said Phil, softly, “Stay true to yourself and write what you feel. Those guys that are ignoring you and teasing you? They are jealous of you.”
“No,” Dan began , “There is no way they are …”
“They are, Dan, I promise. You aren’t like them and they can feel it. You aren’t some shallow kid who wears eye make up and calls himself Emo: you are a gifted writer with a beautiful soul–a soul that is hurting, yes– but still a beautiful one. Never cover that up. It is the people who are unique who end up making a difference in this world, Dan. You are one of those people.”
“Phil, we’ve got to head out” came the call from Steve at the front of the bus.
“Hey, is your mom picking you up, Dan, or do you need a ride?”
“Oh, no she isn’t, but I can walk, I mean, I wouldn’t want to put you out of your way,” Dan said, hoping against hope that he could prolong his contact with Phil for even just a few more minutes.
“Steve, we’re dropping Dan home on the way. Dan, where do you live?”
Dan gave Steve directions, and on the way home, Phil signed Dan’s “Heart Bleed” CD “To Dan, You’re Amazing, Always, Phil Lester”.
When they reached his house, Phil gave Dan a prolonged hug as they stood just outside of the tour bus.
“You keep writing, okay? I’ll be checking!” Phil said to Dan, encouragingly.
“I will, I promise!” said Dan, as they broke their embrace.
Phil stepped back on the bus and stood on the stairs and waved as the doors closed.
Dan smiled. For the first time in a long time, he smiled: unironically and without a speck of pain in his heart, he smiled. As he stood under the yellow rays of the streetlight watching the bus drive away, he knew something inside him had changed. His broken heart had begun to heal. His life was going to change. He just knew it.
—————————————————————————————————————————
Over the course of the next year, Dan and Phil kept in close touch through MySpace and eventually started talking to each other on Skype. The relationship was truly a blessing for both young men, as Phil was inspired by Dan’s brilliant writing, and Dan was gaining self-confidence from Phil’s gentle encouragement. Slowly, the celebrity/fan relationship changed to one of close friendship. They talked through the nights on Skype and they developed a closeness that Dan had yearned for all of his life.
As the months passed, their friendship grew and blossomed into an affection that surprised them both. When they were not on Skype, they were texting; when they were not texting, they were on the phone. Although they were hundreds of miles apart, they were becoming inseparable.
Almost a year to the day from their first meeting, Phil and LesterBloom returned to Dan’s little town. Phil got Dan front row seats and Dan got the surprise of his life when Phil announced to the crowd, “This song was written by my friend, Dan Howell, who is a gifted writer, a good person, and many other things–but definitely not a poser”. Dan’s breath caught in his throat as he heard Phil begin to sing one of his poems to hundreds of people. The crowd loved it and Dan beamed with pride. Phil gave him a wink from the stage when the song was over and Dan felt himself turn crimson with both embarrassment and pride.
After the show, Dan met Phil backstage and they walked together to the tour bus for some privacy.
“I can’t believe you wrote music to my poem!” Dan exclaimed.
“Did you like it?” Phil asked
“Of course, yes, I mean, you were amazing!”
“I’m glad you liked it,” said Phil. “And you’re the one who is amazing. Those lyrics touched a lot of people tonight.”
“Thank you, Phil,” said Dan, overwhelmed, “I can’t say that enough.”
“I’ve missed you,” said Phil, out of nowhere.
“I’ve missed you too,” Dan replied, suddenly feeling butterflies in his stomach.
Dan looked into Phil’s eyes and a silence overcame them both. The affection between them had grown, but what was this feeling?
“Dan, you’re out of school for the summer in a few weeks, right?” asked Phil.
“Yes, starting August 2. Why?”
“Well, I was thinking, how would you like to come with us on the rest of the summer tour ?”
“Are you serious?” asked Dan.
“Very. Dan, I want to spend time with you and I want you to have the time to write more. And trust me, you have nothing but time on a tour bus! Also, you need to get away from those people you call your “friends” and hang out with guys who really like you for who you are.”
“Phil, you totally don’t have to sell me on this. I definitely want to go!” Dan said with a beaming smile.
They both laughed.
Then an unexpected silence built between them. A tension rose in Dan’s stomach. It was a feeling he had never really felt before: one of dread and yearning, of fear and desire all at the same time. He did not know what to do with it. All he knew was he was staring into his best friend’s eyes and yet he somehow wanted more.
Phil’s breaths quickened slightly with a yearning he had not expected to feel. This beautiful boy in front of him was staring at him and all he wanted to do was get closer to him.
And so he did.
Phil leaned in and softly took Dan’s upper lip between his own. Dan stopped breathing, feeling a stirring deep inside and a yearning for one thing: more. He closed his eyes and parted his lips slightly, allowing Phil to gently press into his lips a bit farther. They were softer than he had expected. They were warm and salty. And all that Dan could think was that all of his life he had been a half and now he was whole.
—————————————————————————————————————————-
The summer tour allowed Dan and Phil to spend every day together for three months. Days not spent on the road were spent at amusement parks, museums and local scenic locations, and nights were spent platonically sharing a warm bed in the back of the bus. Dan hadn’t been cuddled since he was a baby, so the sensation of Phil holding him as he fell asleep was heavenly to him. He learned that he enjoyed being the “little spoon”, that he loved soft, sensual kisses, and that waking up to a kiss on the forehead was his favorite thing in the world.
Finally, that endless summer came to a close and Dan had to get back to start University. He was no longer afraid of what others would think of him. Through the support of his best friend and the new friends he had made while on tour, he had developed a self-confidence he had never had before. He enrolled in University and immediately became the center of a small group of good friends who were attracted to his self-confidence. No one called him a poser and a few people even asked for his autograph. His old “friends” even made it a point to congratulate him on his success, though it was obvious they were doing it so they could meet Phil. Dan took great pleasure at brushing them off.
As much fun as Dan was having at University studying law, he nearly flunked out from spending so much time on Skype with Phil instead of studying. They stayed up past midnight talking and often fell asleep with the program still open.
One night, right before spring break, Phil asked Dan, “Hey, I’d like to fly you out to London for the week. Do you want to come? I mean, it will be lonely at Uni with everyone gone and I know you aren’t looking forward to spending time with your parents.”
“You know I’d love to,” answered Dan. “I miss you so much!”
And so, the plans were made and before he knew it, Dan was on a plane headed to London.
At the airport, Phil stood with a sign that said, “Beautiful Boy”, and Dan blushed as he rushed over to Phil and slapped it out of his hands to the floor.
“Well, it’s true!” said Phil, laughing.
“Oh my God!” said Dan, laughing but also mortified, “I can’t believe you did that!”
They took the limo back to the hotel and Phil helped Dan carry his luggage into the penthouse suite. Dan immediately noticed there was only one bed and leapt onto it without hesitation.
“Cuddle me!” Dan demanded.
Phil laughed, and climbed into bed, gently encircling his arms around Dan’s shoulders and resting his head on Dan’s neck.
“I’ve missed this,” whispered Phil.
“Mhmm. Me too,” said Dan.
Dan reached back and stroked Phil’s straight black hair. Phil closed his eyes and smiled, slowly caressing Dan’s calf with his foot. Their breathing slowed and became in sync.
“Dan?”
“Hmm?”
“I love you.”
Dan turned slightly towards his back and looked into Phil’s eyes. “You do?” he asked, hesitantly, for he was afraid he may have misheard as this could not possibly be true.
“Yes, Dan. I love you.”
“No one has ever said that to me before”
“I know, sweetheart. I know.”
Dan’s eyes filled with tears. He turned to his left side and faced Phil, burying his face into his chest. As he wept, Phil kissed his hair and caressed his back.
“Shhh. It’s okay, Danny. It’s okay,” Phil repeated softly, holding Dan gently in his arms and rocking him until he finally fell into a deep sleep.
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The next morning, they awoke in each other’s arms. Dan’s eyes were puffy from crying, but Phil saw nothing but beauty when he looked into his face. He gently kissed Dan and to his surprise, Dan held him when he began to pull away.
They held the kiss for what seemed like an eternity, until finally, Dan broke it and looked into Phil’s eyes.
“Phil? I love you, too.”
Phil smiled, his eyes warm and beaming with happiness.
Foreheads pressed together, they gazed deeply into each other’s eyes, breaths slowly synchronizing. They said no more words, for they needed none. The silence between them was one of comfort and trust, safety and home.
Phil reached up and brushed a hair away from Dan’s eye. He let his hand rest on the younger boy’s hair and brought his other one up to cradle his head.
“Dan,” began Phil, softly, “I feel a closeness to you that I’ve never felt with anyone. It’s strange actually–I feel so close to you that all I want to do is get even closer. Does that make sense?”
“Yes”, Dan answered, his breath quickening.
“I don’t want you to feel pressure, though, Dan. I’m happy just to hold you. We don’t have to do anything more if you–”
Dan leaned in and kissed Phil greedily on the lips. He let his hands drop from around Phil’s shoulders and to his waist, where he pulled the older boy closer to his hips. Phil’s hands moved down also and began to gently caress Dan’s back and buttocks. Sweet, passionate kisses continued as they innocently explored each other’s bodies, finding joys and pleasures they had never experienced before.
An hour later, Phil was above Dan, holding his face in his hands as Dan’s neck tilted backwards, his mouth agape in silent ecstasy. As his body rocked in waves of pleasure and a single tear rolled down his face, Phil whispered to him, “I love you, I love you, I love you” over and over and over again.
—————————————————————————————————————————-
Dan scratches away in his notebook, his latest existential crisis bringing him sadness and pain, when suddenly a wave of peace washes over him. He pauses a moment, then turns to a clean page and jots this down:
At the end of the day, I have you by my side
And the worries and cares of the world slip aside
I can take a deep breath with your hand in mine,
And the future seems bright as our two lives align
He tears the page from his notebook and leaves it on Phil’s pillow.
Phil reads the poem from Dan and smiles. Not quite the poet that Dan is, he sits down and works hard on his reply for about an hour, then tears the sheet of paper out of his notebook and leaves it for Dan on his piano.
You break down my walls
As no one else can
It’s so hard to believe
You were once just a fan
For now you’re my everything
My day and my night
I look at your smile
And the world seems so bright
For you’re my protector
My guardian knight
Within your safe arms
My imagination takes flight
So play me a song
Love me best you can
For you are my angel
You are my Dan
The creak of the piano bench awakens Phil from a fitful sleep. The soft notes of the classical piece gently played for him from the next room send him back off to sleep, this time to dream of his soulmate, his friend, his lover, his Dan.
EPILOGUE
Dan Howell’s songs are typically the most popular ones on LesterBloom’s concert setlists, topped only by the songs from “Heart Bleed”. He and Phil share a flat in London where they have a small dog named Linus Van Pelt and a hamster named Timothy. Their daughter, Kara, is in Grade 2.
THE END
Notes: Raining Inside is taken from the song “Raining on the Inside” by Amy Grant Gill and Kathy Troccolli.
thedoctorscompanion replied to your post: lmao i’m going to need to do somethin...
I don’t know you that well, but my favorite experiences involve road trips where we stop and explore every scenic route, run around the woods, watch rapids and waterfall, then go skinny dipping.
oh god not my thing (also i live in suburban california and can't drive) but thanks.
if any of u little shits have a quotev you should go on there and follow me because i'm 103% more rad on there then I am on here B)
http://www.quotev.com/TheDoctorsCompanion
and if you don't have a quotev make one because you'll be like 103% more rad B)
hella rad
