@thelegendofjenna This may warrant a separate post because there's been a development. A possibly good development.
So I wrote in my long ass post that after I bitched to my dad about how I wish there were another adult living here (with him sitting 1.5m next to me), he actually cleaned stuff up, which led to me thinking "okay.... kinda pathetic that this is the best version of you, but maybe this will work" and then it [Les Mis melody] it alllll went wrong.
But he's still doing stuff, out of himself?????
Yesterday he cleaned up the dog toys, he cleaned the dishes, he cleaned his trash in the living room, he closed the curtains and put the cushions back on the couch, he cleaned up my ironing equipment, he walked the dog twice, he brought the clean laundry upstairs, he cleaned the GFT bin, he vacuumed and mopped, he cleaned the gaming stuff, HE CLEANED HIS OVERFILLED ASH TRAY!
Like... I sat outside in the sun, reading, because I expected to have to do all of that stuff and I suddenly didn't have to anymore. I suddenly had time.
My sister was able to relax and do her nails yesterday. She didn't have to take an extended break in bed for the first day since I have gotten here. She made soup and that was basically the only task she did and she wanted to do it, and she was able to!
Look, I am still not getting my hopes up because we all know what happened before.
I don't know if my sister gave him a stern talking while I was in bed for 18 hours in a row with migraine. Or maybe he is trying to impress me. My parents know that he sometimes offers help while they are home, whereas he doesn't do crap when it's just him and my sister. They actually asked me to keep an eye on whether he'd offer to do stuff for me as well. I hope this will keep up while I am here and I truly hope it will keep up when I am gone.
But yeah, he has been living here for months and he's just... gotten away with it. Everyone's been mad about it for all those months, but as I said, Jenna, people just keep making excuses not necessarily for him but for why they don't have to say anything. Everyone says my sister has to say it and he doesn't listen to her, which leads to everyone going "well, let it go, this is how it is."
And I come in with an attitude of "not on my fucking watch" and NOT ON MY FUCKING WATCH. I flip out on him twice and suddenly he contributes. Ever since he started doing shit, the mood in the house is so much better because woah, the source of my anger is slowly going away, and therefore my anger slowly goes away. What a concept. And as a result, I am more lenient. Now when I see his empty bottle, I don't think "he can't even do that" but instead think ".... maybe he will clean this later" which according to everyone seems to be a wild thought!
Gosh, maybe we shouldn't have let him off the hook for all this time. Maybe we should've fucking kicked his arse the moment it became clear he's a 31 year old adult man who doesn't even know where to take out the trash of the house he's been living in for months.
I told my friend about this and they were also saying about this is just another social construction that has been integrated into society up to the point where people don't question it, but then someone does question it, and things change. Even on a small scale like in one household. (Bro, imagine I alone could stop sexism in the world.)
Again, I am not immediately gonna jump on the bandwagon and claim I "fixed" him. As I said in that post, I am also not under the impression I can do that. This is why I said I also won't be surprised he only does it for me.
But who knows, amirite?
