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Relationship fact: communication per se isn’t the most important thing in a relationship: taking responsibility is.
You can be the most analytical, empathetic, communicative person in the world, but if you can’t accept your portion of responsibility and keep on shifting the blame, the relationship will suffer.
Relationship fact: romanticizing pain and waiting for someone to save you from it puts you into victim mentality. No one can do the work but you. Only you are responsible for your own healing process.
Expecting someone to be your SO and therapist at the same time is unfair to them and will make either one or both of you unhappy in the end.
Relationship fact: replying to your SO's every text the minute they send it isn't a sign of true, healthy love and dedication: it's a sign of an unhealthy relationship built on obsession and the inability to separate from your partner.
You partner shouldn't be the most important part of your life: you should. And stopping something abruptly, be it time spent with friends or practicing a hobby just so they wouldn't wait for a bit is unhealthy.
Relationship fact: You don't need a better half. You need to love and accept yourself unconditionally before entering a relationship. Otherwise, there'll be a lot of dependance and it simply can't be healthy.
Work on yourself and understand that you're enough and that your SO should come as a bonus, not a necessity
Relationship fact: control is the opposite of trust. You can't say you trust someone if you need to constantly be convinced of their faithfulness by going through their messages.
Trust comes from not knowing, but believing, and if you want trust in your relationship, you either need to let go of control, or find a more trustworthy partner.
Relationship tip #4: Don't try desperately to "win someone back" right after the breakup. If your issues were such that you couldn't help but break up, it won't be a healthy relationship.
After you've both worked on yourselves and changed, it might work out, but it won't happen right away. It will only keep you stuck and unhappy.
Relationship tip #1: when you're fighting, focus on yourself and how you feel. Say "I feel hurt when you talk to me that way", rather than "you're hurting me".
This helps the conversation move from being a blame game to a healthy, open discussion. So instead of getting defensive, your partner can understand you and where you're coming from.
Relationship fact: Affirmations won’t save your relationship.
Repeating a bunch of positive mumbo-jumbo to yourself without putting any real work into the relationship will do nothing for you. Relationships are hard af and unless you put in the actual effort, talk about your issues and try to overcome them together, no amount of affirming will solve them for you.
