#thingsmycatdoes

[tattingcat]

Use my face as a pillow. #Thingsmycatdoes. #howdoisleepnow #catsofbirmingham #catsofinstagram

[bekahfett]

She's been so bad at being a cat lately, then I turn around and see this. #socomfy #thingsmycatdoes

[fenvincible]

For the last twenty minutes my kitten, Artimus, has subjected me to multiple bites (on my nose and fingers). As well as his ass being rubbed on my face because he wants to sit on my chest.

[okayame-blog]

The scene: me and a couple of friends hanging out, playing games and having fun being nerdy. Cat watches from various high points around the room.

Me: *Gets up to go to the bathroom, tickling a friend on the way*

Cat: *Thinks 'The injustice! I shall avenge you, person I have hissed at and terrified before!' Proceeds to attack the fuck out of my leg*

Everyone in the room: "Omfg, cat, what is wrong with you?!"

Cat: *Smug, satisfied licking of paw. 'Mission accomplished.'*

[okayame-blog]

Me: *Walks across living room*

Cat: *Attacks leg*

Me: "No!" *Taps his butt*

Cat: *slinks away*

Me: *Walks across living room again*

Cat: *attacks leg*

Me: *In a fit of frustration, pins cat and lays on him*

Cat: *Unhappy noises and whipping of tail*

Me: *Lets cat up, walks to couch and sits*

Cat: *Sneaks up (not stealthy, I knew you were there) curls up in my lap. Begins purring*

Me: *Looks down at cat. Pets him* "Fucking cat."

Cat: *Purrrrrr*

[no-this-is-patrick-blog]

My friends...

Me: *to friends as they leave for church* Have fun with Jesus!

Amanda: No! Have fun with God!

Emily: No, God and Jesus. THEY'RE THE SAME PERSON.

Amanda: No they aren't! Are you, your mom, and your sisters the same person?

Emily: NO, BUT WE'RE NOT GOD!!!! I WENT TO CATHOLIC SCHOOL!!!! IN KNOW THESE THINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[skillzyo]

Omg you reblogged questions like an hour ago. 2, 29, & 34 gogogogogogo.

2. What color underwear/boxers are you wearing?

loooool black. XDDD

29. What books are you reading?

Ugh, too many! Moominpappa and the Sea, His Dark Materials, The Botany of Desire. Just finished An American Childhood by Annie Dillard

34. Butter, plain, or salted popcorn?

Butter and salt is heaven. Or, if I can have kettle corn... mmmm

[skillzyo]

thingsmycatdoes replied to your post: thingsmycatdoes replied to your post: You...

Omg bee charmer. I wish I could do that. But I would probs die. Just the thought of all of those bees…..noicant. And don’t worry I’ll keep your secret shh.

Haha when she tries to be all smooth. "Just tell her it's the bee charmer." "Ruuuth! Some be person is here to see you!"

shh thanks! then again, I posted that publicly so... hahaha