#thinking to myself

[darrys-laundry]

Tex (1982)

[y2kplaysthetics]

Even though I’m being totally grounded and realistic about it, I do believe my music will take me places.

Now, I sure as shit don’t see myself selling out stadiums or arenas though. That’s completely out of reach for a person like me. However, I definitely think I can get myself to the point of selling out large clubs, theater type venues, and maybe even the odd convention center sized building if I’m lucky enough to get booked alongside some other acts.

I don’t see why not. Sure, future funk and an oddly specific sub-genre of house music (Capcom or SNK fighter OSTs from the 2000s) is pretty niche, but there’s definitely an audience. If nothing else, I can play to the nostalgia crowd. That shit is more addictive than crack or the shit your therapist prescribes, don’t ya know?

Lofty goals for sure, but not unattainably so. Striving for mediocrity is half the battle because most people that strive for greatness just end up being mediocre anyway. I’m keeping my standards low so I’ll never be disappointed. It’s called strategy. Don’t aim for the head, aim for the torso. Better chance at hitting.

It’s going to be work. Being a content creator and all that other nonsense. I don’t really want to make videos about my music. I’d rather not let everyone know that most of the time I fall ass backwards into a decent track. I’m not a trained musician. I’m more lucky than good. I have to work harder than talented people and chase what they can walk to.

Just don’t let me chase this for too long. Pull me aside when it starts to get sad. I’d like to keep at least some of my dignity haha

[entity56]

because of my intersexuality I feel like a man, but when I'm femme I feel like a trans woman, or sometimes a man dressing up feminine depending on the day... I have the curves of a woman but the shoulders/neck/jawline/facial hair of a man (also the fact that my ring fingers are much longer than my index fingers which makes people assume I MUST be a trans woman irl) so like what does that make me

[call-me-copycat]

Isn't it weird... I used to be able to stay up all night and be sleepy in the day time, but now it's slowly shifted where, no matter how much energy I have, I begin to get sleepy as soon as it hits 10pm. This is new to me

Is it like that 36 hour internal clock thing, instead of having a 24 hour one? That's honestly what it feels like

[sinking-in-stars]

this summertime of pondering is slowly killing me (i feel like a different person and it’s weird)

[cvbin-fever]

i love loving things

[spoonylu]

Thinking deeply about how like 4 years ago, thoughts of my OCs just dominated my mind, but nowadays, that’s not really a thing? 

I’m just thinking to myself, y’know? Why isn’t that a thing anymore? And I think the answer is just. I stopped thinking of my characters as OCs and more as just characters in a self-contained universe. While the Mixed Feelings characters are technically my OCs, their purpose in my brain is to play their part in THAT STORY, so they don’t really go. Outside of that story for me. At least that often.

Now if FANS of Mixed Feelings think of funny little situations and AUs and stuff, that’s awesome. I just don’t look at my own content through the lens of like. Fandom-brain anymore. And I think, for me personally, that’s helped my content?

[thagawdfawthrr]

What’s stopping me from being and accomplishing everything I want?!